𝒍𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒊𝒏 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅𝒔, ˢᵗᵘʳⁿⁱᵒˡᵒ ᵗʳⁱᵖˡᵉᵗˢ

✦Love me [Chris]✦

❖･｡:˚ *✿—————✦—————✿* ˚:｡･❖

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My brothers and I are lounging on the couch when I start to feel like the couch is growing bigger, the gap between us widening. They feel so far away that I suddenly feel exposed. I feel so far away from them and feel myself grow clingy. I stand to get a blanket to pause my restless emotions and go back to the couch. I start to feel needy, like I need to touch or hug someone, needing confirmation that I am loved.

I suddenly feel like I am not loved, like I am not enough to the people around me. I feel like I'm not the person they want to be and they want me to change.

I shift myself closer to Nick, brushing up against his body as I peer over his shoulder. I can feel the warmth radiating off his body and lean into him slightly. The low lights illuminate the room as it seems like a halo is surrounding us, giving us warmth.

"Dude, what are you doing? Back off," Nick says, annoyance dancing at the back of his throat. He angles his phone away from me and slightly moves away from me. I whine slightly and grab the blanket around me in my fists, clawing my short nails into the fibers of the blanket. I feel even more clingy from the distance and move closer to him, needing reassurance that he still loves me.

"Can we watch a movie together?" I ask, hope trapped within my eyes.

"Dude, can you not right now," Nick replies in a harsh grunt, shaking me off. The hope within my eyes diminish and wash away. I notice how he doesn't look up from his phone, doesn't look at me, ignoring my whole existence. A tear gathers in my eye and I just want a hug, is that too much to ask for? Am I really not that much to him? Does he really care about me?

"Please," I whine, wishing I could feel his warmth again. I just want affection so much that it starts to hurt my heart. Come on, look at me, let me know you care.

"Come on bro. Stop bothering me," he mutters, barely able to flick his eyes up to mine.

A tense atmosphere settles over the room, everyone seemingly able to feel it. Frustration seems to pour off of Nick's attitude and loneliness is cascading out of Chris's eyes. Chris mumbles something to himself that no one cares to hear, not that he wanted anyone to hear in the first place.

Chris gives up his efforts and throws off his blanket, only to rush to his room before anyone can see his struggles. Soft sniffles can be heard down the hallway as Chris curls into himself on his bed. He snatches a blanket from the side of his bed and cries into it. His thoughts turn to mush as his eyes grow a tainted red as his cheeks turn a splotchy purple.

He rocks himself back and forth on the foot of his bed as he whispers to himself. His head is held between his knees as the back of his hands wipe the tears away. Please. Please. Please, show me love. Chris thinks as he rocks himself back and forth to an unheard melody.

Matt soon becomes aware of Chris's tears once he hears his sobs echo through the hall. Matt takes out his AirPods and trudges over to Chris's room, making a very prominent sound as his thick shoes hit the hardwood floors. Chris panics at the hollow sounds and wipes away his tears quickly.

"Chris? Are you alright?" Matt says cautiously as he cracks open his bedroom door and takes a step inside the darkened room.

"Matt...I-I don't feel good," Chris barely whispers in a puff of air, finally giving into the hollow feeling. He didn't want his brothers to give him sympathy for crying or being lonely but now that's all he wants now. He wants to be loved.

"Aw, sweetheart, come here," Matt walks over to Chris' bed and folds him within his hold, hugging him like the world is about to end. Matt rocks them back and forth like Chris did to himself and their breaths calm to a soft rhythm. They sit in silence, unsaid words traversing between them.

"It's okay Chrissy. We love you so much," Matt whispers into Chris's ear and his hot breath leaves a tingling feeling to Chriss neck. Matt backs away from the hug and looks at the younger. He cups Chris's soft cheeks between his hands and rubs his thumb over his cheek. Chris leans into his touch and they hug a final time. Matt brushes away Chris's newly shed tears and pushes his fallen hair out of his face.

"I love you too Matt," Chris utters out. 

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❖･｡:˚ *✿—————✦—————✿* ˚:｡･❖

Hey

I feel like I made Nick the villain or something :(

Hope ya'll have a good day!

- love eve