You Must Remember This

Chapter 16 - Dark secrets of shame

A/N - trigger warning for this chapter; details of a 'back-alley abortion' and discussion about the abortion law (more applicable to the time setting of the story, but it's an ongoing discussion even today). If you know the series Call the Midwife, you know these have also been addressed there, and you know that Trixie, who is my inspiration for Evelyn, is at the very center of said scenes. For those who do not know the series, I highly recommend it as it's inspired by the memories of midwife Jennifer Worth, and invite you to watch the clip on www.the-sun.com/entertainment/tv/2944258 as well as the YT clip I added before reading this particular chapter. Remember, my main OC is a midwife, so yes, I do wish to explore every aspect of it, including this.

Brooklyn, May 22nd, 1941

Rebecca kept quiet the entire evening. She barely ate anything, and she wouldn't look directly at Bucky. She just glanced at him when she believed he wasn't looking. Her gaze was a mixture of contempt and fear but also worry. When their father noticed his daughter's silence, he asked her if something was wrong. Bucky dreaded she would tell him what happened with Evelyn, but much to his surprise, she said she was worried about a friend. George let Rebecca excuse herself from the table to call and see if that friend was okay. Then he turned to Bucky.

"And what's going on with you?"

"Nothin'." Bucky huffed as he watched Rebecca pick up the phone. "Just... tired of being stuck on admin with that stupid Ceylon shipment."

"I know you wanna get out there again, Bucky. But it's a big risk for you, and I don't want you to get hurt again."

"I didn't get hurt, pops."

"You still needed meds, didn't you? It's a good thing Evelyn was there that day. Otherwise, you might never have noticed, and things would've gotten a lot worse for you."

Bucky didn't have the energy to talk back. And now that Evelyn's name had come up, he was much for focussed on hiding his clenched fist underneath the table. After taking a few deep breaths (without letting his father notice, of course), Bucky raised his eyes to Rebecca again, who stood with her back to him. She was undoubtedly calling Evelyn to see if she was okay.
When she put down the phone, she called out that she was going to her room. Bucky thought he saw her put a paper in her skirt pocket, but he could've been mistaken. And he didn't think Rebecca would confide him with anything now, considering the God-awful mess he'd made.

The events of the afternoon played over and over like a movie in Bucky's mind, every scene rolling in slow-motion. Every word spoken was uttered with much more gravitas. And every single emotion that had been on Rebecca and Evelyn's faces cut through Bucky like a knife. He didn't know which was worse; that he had lost control in front of his baby sister or that he had physically harmed and threatened Evelyn.
No matter what she did, he shouldn't have hurt her. Bucky knew that. But they weren't talking about some minor offense or rebellious stage. Abortion was a very serious matter and illegal at that. If anyone found out what Evelyn was doing and turned her in, she could get arrested and sentenced to a life-long prison sentence, depending on how substantial the evidence and how many cases were found against her.
And it wasn't just about her doing the abortions that ticked Bucky off (though that was, of course, a big part of it). Steve would get dragged down as well, just for being her brother. That Evelyn hadn't even thought about him was incomprehensible, not to mention hypocritical. She was always going on about how Steve couldn't get into trouble, and here she was, guilty of an actual criminal offense! Bucky rubbed his eyes as he sat back in his seat. He pressed his lips together and pondered what he should do next.

I gotta talk to Becca. She has to understand why I lost it and why it's better to stay away. I'm only trying to look out for her. She can't blame me for that. And I have to stop her from getting even more involved than she already is.