You Must Remember This

Chapter 20 - The thing about theories

Wakanda, 2016

"Shuri, how's your brother?"

The princess of Wakanda looked up when Steve entered Bucky's room.

"Just one cracked rib, thank Bast. He'll be feeling that for some time. Okoye is out for at least a week, though. She hit her head pretty badly. We're keeping her sedated for now."

Steve glanced over to his friend, afraid to learn how he was doing. He looked terrible. His face was swollen, his lip was split, and his right eye was beyond black. There was still some blood in his hair, and there was a very thin cut where Nemesis' knife nicked the skin at his throat. Just a little deeper, and Bucky would have been a goner for sure. Steve shuddered at the thought.

"Do not worry for Sergeant Barnes." Shuri followed his gaze. "He already looks better than when we got him out of the lab. That serum truly is miraculous."

"HYDRA gave him their own variant of the Erskine-serum since they couldn't replicate what I was given. I heal faster, but Bucky can endure a lot more. He was always the strongest of us two. He was... is a fighter, through and through."

He lowered his head when he recalled all the times Bucky saved his ass from the neighborhood bullies and when he won nearly every boxing match they put him down for. Steve had been so jealous of him then. He'd felt ashamed for being so puny and weak. Now he was the one left standing, and Bucky was the one beaten to a bloody pulp.

Evy should see you now. She would probably sit right there in that chair until you woke up, just so that she could be the first person to reprimand you for being an idiot and smack you on the head for good measure.

His eyes searched for Evelyn's journal, finding it on the nightstand beside the bed. He picked it up. The journal felt light and heavy at the same time.

I don't care what you say, Buck. Evy cared about you more than you could possibly imagine. And I know you cared about her too. I saw the stolen glances between you two, the intense looks when you argued or worked together. It was plain as day for anyone. God, why can't you just admit it?

"Will you read it?"

The sudden sound of Shuri's voice shook Steve awake.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"The journal." Shuri pointed to the book in his hands. "Will you read it aloud to him? The words and the sound of a familiar voice may trigger him to wake up."

Steve pressed his lips together. He could start at the beginning. Bucky only told him of a couple of things, and this way, he would also learn what Evelyn had been doing to get his best friend back. He would be able to tell for sure what her motives had been; if it had been all in memory of Steve and just to get his friend back... or if she wanted Bucky back too.

"No. No, Evy wrote this for Bucky. Me reading it wouldn't be right."

"But that is only because you were written up as presumed KIA. Had Evelyn known for sure you were still alive, she would have written this for you, no?"

"I think she did know. That I was still alive and out there somewhere, I mean. When I woke up from the ice, I knew she was gone. I didn't feel her anymore. I know that doesn't make sense, but Evy and I always knew what we felt. We felt each other's emotions like they were our own. It's hard to explain, and probably a cliché to say, but it really is...'

"A twin thing," finished Shuri.

Steve nodded. He knew that wasn't a proven theory, but he didn't care about theories and tests. He and Evelyn had shared everything from the very moment they were conceived. They each were one half of the same heart, the same soul. And to not have his other half with him now, nor ever again... Steve died a little more each day.