One with Maan | On Pause

3.3 | If 1995 was Different

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August 1997,

Anuj and Anupama have officially lived together for six months. The plan initially was for them to go back to India at this point and meet the lawyer, but Anupama could not get leave, and Anuj had started writing up his dissertation.

This was the first time Anupama saw Anuj stressed, anxious and intensely nervous. She had always seen him smiling and being a happy-go-lucky guy. Now, she was seeing him express negative emotions. She often had to be there for him emotionally and tell him everything would be fine.

He would write an excellent dissertation and get a first-class degree. His business with Meenakshi was also going through a tough time. In all of this, she saw that the essence of him didn't change.

He was still a kind and caring man who worried about her and wanted to know about her day. If he were at home, he would make them lunch to eat. She liked that he didn't change even if his situations and circumstances changed.

"My love, I promise you, what you are writing makes sense. I think you are on the right path," Anupama says. "Of course you would say that because we are married," Anuj says. "I am a doctor, so I am smarter than your professor. If I tell you something is right, it is," She says.

"You have a point there. I will stop stressing. Thank you," He says. She gets up to continue folding the clothes. "Did you call me my love?" Anuj asks. "When?" Anupama asks. "I heard you say it," Anuj says. "You must be mistaken," Anupama says. She walked away and bit her tongue. She remembered using that term of endearment on him.

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September 1997,

"I got a letter from our divorce lawyer. She has asked for us to send a written statement stating whether we want to go through with the divorce or postpone the meeting with her to discuss it," Anuj says.

"Oh, that's good. Let's send her a letter," Anupama says. "What are you going to say in the letter? I am writing my exams right now; don't tell me you want to leave me heartbroken now," Anuj says.

"What do you mean?" Anupama asks. "If we get divorced now, I am going to be heartbroken and will mess up my dissertation. I know you want a divorce, but wait a few months," Anuj says.

"I mean, you should know just that people who get broken up with before their exams tank the exams," Anuj says. He was getting hyper. He walked out of the room. "But I don't want to get divorced," She said; it was a whisper so silent.

When she realised what she had said, she held her mouth close. "When did you start thinking this?" Anupama asks herself.

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Later in the day,

Anupama had arrived from her long stroll. She had taken some time to be with herself and her thoughts. She was sure that getting a divorce was not something she wanted anymore. She also knew why she didn't like it anymore, but she kept making excuses in her brain that it was just because she didn't want to disappoint her mother.

Life was difficult for a divorced woman; she liked her parents-in-law too much to lose them, and she didn't want Anuj to become Devdas.

"Where did you go?" Anuj asks. "I wanted some time to myself," Anupama says. "I am sorry for earlier. I was being selfish. I have written a letter stating that we want to proceed with the divorce. You have to sign it," Anuj says.

"I won't," Anupama says. "Why?" Anuj asks. "I don't want a divorce," She says. "You what?" He asks again. "I don't want to divorce you," She says. He was smiling so hard. He coughed. "Is it because of my dissertation?" He asks, the smile going down.