The Regretevator writing dump / oneshots (regretefic)

Bestest of friends =)

(Again I won't write Dr.Retros meows bc it's tiring so yeah lmao)

"You don't get it Retro! It was lampert! He was the one that murdered the players!"

"(Lampert? You sure your sensors werent tampered with?)"

"No no I swear! I..I SAW him! He was stabbing those players and infected was just...watching him..and then he went on this monologue about how he was going to release kasper or help him or- or-"

"(Proto calm down!! look. There's no way that lampert could even have touched those players, for fudge's sake we're talking about the same person who won't even get near people because he thinks the air around them are contagious!)"

"But-!! I swear-!! I'm-"

"(I wonder if trauma does affect robotic brains..)"

 "But-!"

The door clicking through the air suddenly caught the attention of the two people, it was just an injured player, embarrassingly and awkwardly standing through the door, Dr.Retro had to shoo prototype away for a while to handle the mini-situation, the door closing on prototype's face.

Prototype sighed and felt terrible inside, seeing as not even Dr.Retro believed them, he turned around and felt his metaphorical heart almost jump out of his chest when he saw a sight that scared the daylights out of him.

Lampert.

Staring directly into him.

"Oh- uh...hi lampert!" Prototype falsely cheered. Trying to hide their obvious panic and fear.

"Hey prototype. What brings you here?"

"Uhh...I uh...needed help with my..sensors?"

"..shouldn't you go to mark for that." He inquired with a flash of suspicion rising from his cold tone.

"Mark was uh..busy..so I thought Dr.Retro was the second best- optionnn-?"

Lampert kept gazing at prototype, their eyes, while empty, almost also showed a hint of..anger? Was it that? Or maybe a sense that lampert knew.

"Alright then." He said rather sternly "you better watch out though, I heard there is something coming after people"

Prototype almost felt his brain shut down as he squealed in fear and ran off back to the elevator, making sure to watch his back as well..

...

Infected continued to hide under the mass of the blanket, depressed, unable to do nothing but rot all day in the bed, he didn't wanna face the reality that he had created for himself.

That was until he heard the click of the door opening. At first, infecte assumed it was just, lampert. His typical visitor, so he turned around to be greeted by the walking lamp until he saw a much more familiar face.

Pilby.

Seems like they had time to come, they smiled softly at infected, closing the door behind them and walking slowly towards infected, who just stared at pilby in a slight disbelief but still depressed state.

"H-hey infected.."

"..."

"Golly you really do look like a ghost! Just look at how skinny you are.."

Pilby placed a palm over infecteds cheek. Making infected felt warm on his face and he slowly leaned over to nuzzle their palm for a little, earning a bigger smile from pilby.

"Now aren't you a treat.."

"..mhh...H3y..." infected finally muttered out in a rather raspy voice

"You know I missed you right?"

"I kn0w.." infected said, placing a hand over pilbys hand tenderly "I m1ss yu0 2.."

"So...you feeling any better? Is the medicine doing its trick?"

"K..k1nd4?" Infected said, trying to sit up slightly but collapsing back onto his bed, still rather weak "3Ugh!"

"!! Hey take it easy- Jeepers.."

"1tz wh4t3v3r.." he scoffed, laying down in a position that seemed kind of perfect for infected "4nyw4yz wh4t ab0ut yu0? D..d1d Uhm." Infected pointed at the injury that was placed on pilby from before, pilby immediately reassured infected "oh golly! don't worry about that- it's better now, just a little scratch I promise."

"BUt I 4lm0st.." infected almost geared up thinking about the circumstances, for if he had not restrained himself and ran away, he could've...done so much worse to pilby, to put it in lighter terms.

"Oh c'mon don't be a wet towel! I already forgave you but still..we can work it out." Pilby smiled as they leaned in and gave a slight kiss to infecteds forehead, but infected seemingly rejected it, looking deeply guilty as he remembered..

That dream..

He looked into pilbys eyes, his own welling up with tears, "1t s n0t f1n3.." he said in an audible whisper as he gulped, taking a deep breath as he moved pilbys hand aside.

"Th3r3s s0m3th1ng 1 g0tt4 t3ll yu0...1st 4b0Ut mY dr34m.."

...

Lampert grew impatient. Something he typically never feels. He didn't mind standing still for hours at a time, but for some reason there was an itch. And itch inside him that called out. An itch to see kasper. His real best friend again..

As he was about to peep into the door, it slammed open, almost flattened his poor lampshade, he saw pilby run out and sob, almost in..fear? Yeah, didn't seem like pilby was hurt that much. Just, very very afraid. Lampert shrugged though, it wasn't any of his business, he just entered to see infected in disbelief and depressed, he looked up to see lampert.

"L4mp3rt?"

"Heyo infected"

Lampert seemed...almost cheery? Despite him usually being numb, he exhibited more emotion than usual, giving an off-putting aura for infected as lampert opened the lights and zoomed by to sit next to a strained and agitated infected, shilling his eyes from the lights.

"D1d yu0 h4v3 t0?"

"Yeah. Anyways, how you doing?"

Infected seemed almost annoyed "br4h..d1d yu0 n0t s33?? My f##king b0yfr13nd r4n 4w4y fr0m m3!"

He lowered his head "pr0b4bly bc 1m a m-m0nst3r.."

"I don't think you are."

Infected perked up slightly and looked up at lampert.

"You're still my friend. Monster or not. I'm gonna stick by you all the time." Lampert lied. Giving off false hope as he saw infected smile.

"R..r34lly?"

"Mhm! You don't deserve pilby. Or your dad. Or anyone really if they're all just gonna ignore you or run away from you. You only need me. Your bestest of friends."

Lampert then did something a little surprisingly, he cupped infecteds tear stained cheeks and his disheveled looking hair, and while infected could have commented on the odd behavior, he was too devastated to notice and leaned in to rub his cheek against lamperts familiar hand.

"T..th4nk yu0.."

"No need to thank me. Infected, besides..what are friends for? =)"