The True Story of Michael Myers

A kid I went to high school with...

They still talk about what happened that night on October 31rst years ago in the small farming town of Springville, Michigan. True story. I went to school with a kid named Michael Myers. He was well liked but not like class president or anything. He liked to party but kept his grades up and fared decently on the track team. Also held down a part time job at a hardware store in town.

Well, one Halloween night, he put on a set of mechanic's coveralls and that mask. And I think you know the one I mean. Since those movies became so popular that blank white William Shatner mask was not hard to come by. So there he was, our very own Michael Myers, on Halloween night, dressed up as the very spitting image of his homicidal namesake from the movies. And then, do you know what he did? All that Halloween night he hung out at his parents' house with his girlfriend giving out candy to trick-or-treaters. Then afterward, when the kids stopped coming by for their Halloween candy, he and his girlfriend, Chrissy, smoked a little weed and drank a few beers and then they made love. After that they turned in.

"Is that it?! What else happened?!"

Well, lets see.... After graduating, he did 4 years in the Air Force, which helped pay his way through business school. Last I knew he owns a chain of grocery stores, he and Chrissy happily married with 2 kids. And every year, old Michael Myers, well, he puts on that creepy mask and coveralls and still gives out candy to the kids, on Halloween.