13.....Degrading over time

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[Your pov]

    “W-we can run away,” he says. Your heart dropped at the thought of running away. Jin was always one to be unrealistic, but this…..You look up at him in disbelief. You were shocked, how would that help our situation?

    “J-jin! We can't! That would dig the hole we’re in even deeper,” you argue.

“Y/n, listen. I-I have friends in America. We can run away there. No one would ever know. W-we can change our names and start over again. We can heal all the scars in our lives and start over!” he put his hand on my cheek, “we only need each other…”

    I look down and take a deep quiet breath. You open your mouth to say something but nothing comes out of it. You put your hand over his. You stay like that for a minute and when you two make eye contact he looks so desperate. Almost like a child. 

    “Jin… don't be silly,” you say with a voice of honey.

“Y/n, please. I-if i lose you,” he starts to panic, “if..if I lose you, I don't know what I would do. I don't want you to be sent away! I don't want to be alone! You can't..please Y/n.. Don't leave me alone” he says frantically and desperately. You feel your heart in your throat and your eyes begin to tear up, at seeing your best friend, the one who is always so strong in front of you, being so vulnerable. 

    “Jin. stop talking,” you whisper. You pull him closer and put your arms around his shoulders, getting up on your tiptoes because he was so tall compared to you.

    “Y/n?,” he whimpers out.

“Yes?” you hum. He lets go of you and pulls away. 

    “I don't want to lose you to that red-head.” he says in a flat tone. You were a bit taken back, and giggle nervously. You rub the back of your neck.

    “Jin….” you smile, “I told you to stop being silly. You're my brother,”  go up on my tiptoes agan and give him a small peck on the cheek. He blushes like crazy. His face was practically the color of the tomatoes you were cooking…...cooking….WAIT!!! You whip your head toward the stove.

    “JIN THE VEGGIES!!!” you yell. He quickly realized and turned around to see that the veggies that were already cooking, were now burning.

    You scramble over to the stove, and turn it off. “Shit,” you grimace, “Jiin~” you wine, “can we just order grubhub or something?”

    He giggles and get his phone out, “Yeah, you want taco bell right?” he asks with a knowing smile. You practically jump in joy and nod your head.

    “Can I have th-” you start but he finishes for you.

“The nacho fry bell grande with extra cheese, meat and sour cream and no tomatoes.” he looks over at you and smirks. (btw this is literally the only thing I get from taco besides)

    “You suck!” you laugh hitting his arm. He laughs and goes over to the couch and sits down and grabs his bong (the thing that is used to smoke the devils lettuce). 

    You go over and sit down next to him. He finishes ordering the food, and grabs his lighter. You wait your turn as he lifts it to his mouth, and lights the ‘lettuce’ and sucks air in. He then takes out the little corck letting the smoke fill his lungs. He passes it to you and you do the same thing. Both of you let it sit in your lungs for a moment before blowing it out, feeling the relief of a withdrawal. You take turns passing it back and forth. 

    “Jiin~… when's the food going to be here,” you whine. 

 Then the doorbell rings. You turn your head so fast that your hair almost whips Jin in the face. You smile happily and practically jump off the couch with excitement. 

    “JIN IT’S THE FOOD!!!” you squeal. He points to the counter at his wallet, and you grab it, nearly tripping on your way to the door. The poor delivery man was hit with a horrid smell of pot, and you didn't do anything but give him the money, a tip, and snatched the food from his hands and slam the door in his face.

    “Did you give him a tip?” Jin asks. You nod and sit down next to him. You hand him his tocas and you open up your beautiful nacho-fry bellgrande box. You were hit with the amazing smell of the food. You take the plastic spork out of the wrapping and dig in. as you stuff your face you can hear Jin chuckle. You flip him off and shove fries in his mouth with your spork.

    “Mmhp!” he instantly tries to catch the extra food that missed his mouth, with his hand. He quickly begins to chew and when he swallows he just glares at you. You laugh at him with tears in your eyes. It normally wouldn't be that funny but you were both high as fuck and out of it. You giggle and he pushes you a bit. You smile and before you know it you start getting really close to him.

    You put your hand on his cheek. Why have you never realized how beautiful he is? His eyes were glassy and bloodshot. 

    “Y-y/n...what are you-” he stutters out. You lean in even closer and whisper his name. You close your eyes and slowly lean in. your mind is fuzzy and your eyes burn with pleasure. You brush your lips against his, just barely touching him. It would even count as a kiss.

    “Y-y/n stop!” Jin spits out, grabbing you shoulders and pulling you away. You open your eyes with confusion and look at him. Only then you start to process what you were doing. You slap your hands over your mouth.

    “O-Oh my god! I-i’m so sorry! I didn’t… we… you and…” you couldn't even talk, “I’m so sorry! I didn't mean to! I-i wasn't thinking,” you spit out. You look over at him and he looks terribly disappointed. It looks like he had just gotten his heart broken.

    He weakly smiles, “I-it’s ok Y/n. we’re both a little out of it right now...”

You glance over to him and see the pain in his eyes. What you just tried to do wasn't ok. That probably made everything so much more complicated… 

    “Fuck…” you put your elbows your knees and lean into your hands, covering your face, “JIn… I’m sorry. I-I didn't mean it.” 

    “It's fine.” he says again in a more stern tone. You look down and shut up. You put your food down, and stand up and walk toward the bathroom. You lock the door behind you and walk over to the sink. You put your hands on the sink to support yourself as you take deep breaths in and release them as sighs. Your head hangs low as your head pounds and throbs.

    You shake your head and look up into the mirror to face your reflection. You look awful. Your face is still trying to heal from the damage your mother had inflicted on you. You turn on the faucet and splash cold water on your face. It feels nice. It brings you back down to your thoughts as is knocks your somewhat back into the cruel reality you had been out of just moments ago. 

    “Shit…” you sigh. You splash your face a few more times and look back up to see your reflection. But it wasn't just you in the mirror. She was there too.

Word count: 1302

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