Weak

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"Ethan,You should forget about him.Instead of crying your eyes out like this,You should just let him be happy."

I hate to admit it,but my bestfriend's right.What can i say,after loving him for three years,he left me to marry a girl.His parents liked her better,she's pretty,she's humble,she's not like me who just gets drunk after being dumped.I fucking hate myself right now.

"Listen to me,He's gone.He's not coming back,it has been a year already."

"i-it still...pains me.."

"Forget about that jerk Ethan,Tyler is gone."

"h-he is the first person i trusted Sam"

"Then stop hurting yourself more he broke your trust already!You even went to their wedding a year ago so why don't you knock your senses and just accept the fact that he never loved you!"

I looked at Sam and cried.She just hugged me and said...

"I'm sorry Ethan,but i had to say it.He would never leave you if he truly loved you.You are my best friend,i care about you."

All i felt was pain,it was a mixture of numbness and anger.I wanted to push her for telling me those words,but she's right.I wasn't able to move for quite a while and she was just calming me down,her small hands patting my back and our height difference wasn't a problem for her.I felt how much my bestfriend cared for me and how she wants me to end all the pain,i have been cold to everyone for a year and i just want to feel better.

"Listen to me.Starting tomorrow i don't want to see you sobbing like this or even being cold to everyone you meet.I want to see the old you,the person who smiles a lot,unproblematic,joyful and the real you Ethan.Can you try to move on for all of us?"

"B-But i-"

"You have to do it,you can't live like this forever."

I looked deep into her eyes and she was dead serious.I don't know what to say,i'm speechless.My body was stiff and i am all numb,but all i did was nod and eventually just stopped crying.

I'm Ethan Presley,22 years old.I am in third year college.I am still trying to move on from my ex boyfriend but...it's not that easy.I have a really weak heart physically and emotionally so i am trying my best not to stress myself too much.I also get asthma attacks from crying too much so i am trying to do it less.

I am walking on our Uni while fixing myself to look more presentable and neat.I hate showing up all messy,i would look awful.Our Uni is huge,i often get tired from walking so i always bring my mini fan and some tissue paoer to wipe my sweat but it's irritating to see tons of people going to school just to see their....boyfriends.

"Babyy!!"

"Honey!!"

"I love you so much Bae!"

"Let's go on a date love!"

Argh!!This is a fucking University not a dating site.I hate seeing people flirting on the road,I hate seeing people with their so called FAEN(Thai word for partner,boyfriend/girlfriend)
You are not gonna last long you idiots,You are gonna be just like me.You are also gonna be hating all the holidays,especially....Valentines day.It's a fictional character so why are you celebrating it?!People are really stupid.Love isn't meant to last,it is just meant to be experienced.You shouldn't trust too much,or you'll be just like......me.


                    To be continued...

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