KSIMON - a lifetime loving you

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simon and jj have moved out, after so many years of living together. it was definitely very bittersweet filming that video for simon's channel, talking about all the memories that had been formed with the houses they've lived in and also just why they were moving apart. for jide, this felt like a new chapter in his life. he was now moving on to bigger and better things as his music career began to climb and grow more, as well as his new company with logan. he had more important things and was no longer spending most of his time at home playing games in his bedroom like usual.

simon however... he was struggling a little more than he wanted to actually admit.

needless to say, moving out after such a long time was always going to upset him but... there was something deeper rooted that was upsetting him to this extent.

during multiple recordings, the boys had noticed off camera that simon was upset. he was good at putting on a face for sure, because during the videos he made sure to be his usual bubbly and giggly self, but once things stopped rolling; his smile would drop within a beat.

"si? is everything alright mate?" harry asked after noticing the males face, placing his hand onto simon's shoulder as the older winced but then sighed and shrugged.

"yeah, fine."

"you sure, minter? always here for you-"

"i'm fine bog, don't push it." he snapped, startling the youngest of the group who took a step back and then let out a puff of air.

"alright then, sorry." harry mumbled, before turning away and heading over to behz and tobi who were fixated on something. simon bit his lip, realizing what he had done. his emotions were leading him to lash out and push everyone away, even those who care.

he didn't need to be selfish...

he shook it off and headed home once shooting was over, immediately going to his room and avoiding talia who asked worriedly if he was doing okay. he didn't deserve her love, her sympathy, her consideration and care. he deserved none of it at all.

"si? did the shooting go well?" she asked gently while knocking on his door, but he didn't reply to her.

she let out a breath and then left him, knowing when simon was like this he prefered to be alone. she wished she could help him but she knew him all too well. simon was really starting to push everyone away, and for what? this one thing, this one reason that'll never actually happen is making him want nothing more than to have nobody around him and have nobody help him.

maybe he should've just given up a long time ago, but he was too far gone.

today, a few days after the mini incident with harry and talia, the boys decided to head to simon's house for an irl shooting of a random game like charades since talia was out filming and making some new music. jj heard the plan that the others had made in the group chat, and decided he should go a little earlier than everyone else so he could see simon properly and maybe just talk to him.

he hadn't gotten a real chance to talk to him privately in a while, with all the moresidemen filming, sidemen sundays and going to vegas too.

he felt it'd be a perfect chance for them to catch up.

he arrived at the residence, and knocked on the door to a hear a soft, "it's open." come from inside so with that invitation, he opened it and entered. he made his way down the hall and to the living room where simom was setting up the tripods for the camera's that kon and the others were going to bring. the older didn't move his gaze for a while until finally lifting his head when no sound was made, and when he noticed the boy his entire body tensed.

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⏰ Last updated: Apr 10, 2022 ⏰

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