Those Ocean Eyes and That Charming Smile

185

I nod again and give him permission and he ever so gently, lifts up my hand like my bones are made out of silk as he uncaps the syringe to move to the IV sight and hooks it up to the second tube that has probably been used for my medication as he squeezes down the plunger and I feel instant relief.

"Hmm." I sigh at the relief but soon, tears flood my eyes and my chest coughs out deeps breaths that I probably haven't taken in a while

"My love." Bucky frowns. "What is hurting you so I can make it better for my doll?" He asks in the most sweetest but concerned voice 

"I'm scared." I swallow and look all around me. "I-I'm scared because all I can see and feel are tubes coming out of every part of my fucking body and I don't know what to do." I explain and he nods in understanding. "It hurts... everywhere. I hurt everywhere, Bucky." I say

"Sweetheart, it's alright." He sits on the edge of the bed near my hip and leans down to give me the softest hug when I ask for one after needing the comfort of his arms that hold me to his chest and his lips that gently kiss my cheek. "Babydoll, I have to ask you a question." He says after a moment of me calming down and sits back in his chair while grabbing my hand to hold in both of his. "If you are feeling okay?" He makes sure

"I'm in some pain but, I am up for talking." I smile a little and feel now what I know is a feeding tube pulling against my nose

"Good." He sighs and looks down at my hand clasped between the both of his that he brings up to his lips to kiss. "D-do you remember everything?" He asks hesitantly

"About being stabbed?" I ask back in confusion and he shrugs where I feel the breath of his emotions roll over my fingers

"About..." He clears his throat and closes his eyes for a moment. "About your life. Where you grew up, your parents, your relationships, your past, and where you are now with the people around you." He clarifies and I blink in deeper confusion

"Is this a joke, Bucky?" I scoff a laugh that drops my amusement the second my stomach spasmed the laugh. "Of course, I remember everything. I just need you to fill me in on why you think I don't." I try to take a deep breath and tip my head back to focus on my breathing from what he said

"Wh-when you died." He swallows the last word as emotions burn in his throat and needs to clear it again. "You were dead for over an hour with no brain activity... I thought I was gonna have to bury my doll but when Steve was on the phone with T'Challa after we talked to them about the copycat shields, he said that he will help and sent Shuri, Okoye, and some of the Dora Milaje to use advanced technology on you." He starts

"Sounds wicked." I speak my first thought and he chuckles with a few tears rolling down his cheeks and it makes me instantly feel bad. "I'm sorry... It's okay, my love." I whisper and squeeze his hand that he returns with a kiss on my fingers. "Take your time." I say and he nods when he takes a moment

"Shuri fused your organs back together but, without the power of the vibranium in Wakanda, she couldn't do much so she fused your major organs like your intestines while Okoye and T'Challa stitched others like your uterus and liver." He sniffles and moves his head to wipe his nose on the thick strap of his tank top

"My uterus is cut?" I question

"Almost every organ in your stomach was sliced or nicked." He nods and groans a little when his emotions get the best of him and he drops his head to cry for a moment that makes me want to get up and hug his sorrow away. "The only ones that stayed untouched was your heart and spleen." He whispers

"Jesus Christ." I mutter and look up at the ceiling for a moment to gather my thoughts and questions. "C-can I still have children, Buck?" I roll my head to look at him when tears flood my eyes at one of my biggest fears