Sincerely Adeline

Journal Entry #1: Men and Boys

"Yeah, like I said, you'd be dead."

"You wouldn't dare shoot me though, would you, princess?"

I got mad and kicked him in the gut hard enough to make him fall over. Actually, I would have... aimed lower if that had been allowed. I told him that if he wanted to risk his life on that, he was a moron. And that was in front of all the other soldiers. That taught him a lesson. Apparently, not enough though since he's been 'on the prowl' and making cat calls at me. I wish he'd back off.

But I'll get him. I'll get him eventually. When I do, he's gonna hate me for life. Good. And meanwhile, I've decided to make his training miserable. Okay so I make all of the soldiers lives 'miserable', but they're all a bunch of sissies anyway. Well, most of them are. There are a few that are... good. But even then, they're still probably going to barely pass requirements.

Remember Wade? He was like that. He was pretty sweet too. He at least had the manners and the social graces. But things just got worse after a while. He was so full of himself and constantly threw pity parties. My mother this, my brother that. I honestly wondered what was going on at that house.

I never actually met his family, but I'm sure that they couldn't have been all bad. I sometimes thought it was something he had against them, like they didn't mean to do anything wrong, he just didn't like them. It happens. I mean, he was a gentleman, but the way he talked about them... I wondered if he ever complained to his friends about me or something like that. And he was like a weed that kept growing back.

I sometimes feel bad about breaking up with him, when I told him it was over (when I moved here), he was just so bitter. I don't know, I think I was a bit of a step out of his normal life, which I think he hated. I guess that's why I don't like commitment. You feel guilty when you leave the other person and if they leave you, you feel like trash.

At least now that I've moved, he's gone... I hope. Actually, he always complained that he wasn't good enough, yet if he had taken all of the time that he did whining and had used if for making himself better, he probably could have run for president and won. Thank goodness that he didn't... I guess... maybe? Whatever. It doesn't matter.

This is why men are idiots. They're all full of themselves. Hit me if I ever tell you otherwise. Then you should see some of them on a date. I've been on some where they'll rant on and on or sit there as though afraid I'd bite them like a snake. I know I must sound like an Amazonian, but I don't mean to There are women that are slow and make their brains hollow and their faces artificial too.

Now I must sound like a pessimist. I don't mean to. I'm just tired, that's all. But I train boys to become soldiers. My dad was a man. He was one of the best. They can do it. Any of them, boys or girls, could grow up. If they will is up to them.

It's late, really late. I have tomorrow off too. Maybe I'll go drive down to D.C., to the mall. I haven't seen that in a long time. Maybe I'll visit a Smithsonian or two. A couple monuments and memorials maybe... Then again, maybe not. The drive will take everything out of me. Possibly, if someone went with me... I could probably find a Colonel or another captain. I doubt that I'd ask a soldier.

The beginning of next Monday is when the soldiers go through a couple rigorous tests... :-)... Okay, they're practically murderous, but I can't wait to see the results. I hope Walsh gets cocky. He's going to get what's coming to him. I plan to pair him up with Wilson, Slade Wilson. Wilson's one of the better soldiers. Listens to orders, takes the time to work and train. I think he'll pass.

He's really quiet too, almost like he doesn't have a social life. I think he might have joined the army to get away from his home town, but I don't know. I guess there's a fair number of boys who come here because of that. If that's the case though, he's sure sticking to it. I guess he likes it. When I observe the man, I can always see that he takes things head on. I think it's the adrenaline that he likes, the thrill, the challenge. It's good, because if he didn't, he'd be worse off than most of the soldiers.

I already know that if he's paired up with Walsh, Walsh will be in a bad mood from the start. It isn't that Wilson's annoying. I just think Walsh hates being outdone and while Wilson never tries to outdo anyone, Walsh sees it like that. It's funny, I can normally pick out who's going to be worth something by the end of training regime. Sergeant Slade Wilson, I think he's one of them. Slade already was something before, but he's never cocky about it, never takes any pride in it.

Perhaps Wilson is proof that boys can become men. Laughs, yeah, sure. Just because he's a good soldier, it doesn't make him a man. Even Walsh is somewhat of a good soldier, but he's an immature waste of my time and tax money. Maybe by the end of training we'll see if Slade Wilson is or can be a man.

2000 hours. I need to go home. Maybe that Mosaic I ordered came in. Maybe not. It's a new piece of a piano and an art easel resting on top of it. I need to go before I can't keep my eyes on the road.

Sincerely,

Adeline