“Mr. Net Siraphop Manithikhun,” my father replied.
The elderly woman suddenly froze and put her tea cup down, visibly shocked.
“What do you need from him?” she asked, sounding a bit sad. Hearing her response gave me hope that she knew my husband, so I spoke up.
“I am his wife,” I said nervously and smiled. The elderly woman looked at me and started to cry.
“Why? Do you know him? Where is he?” I asked urgently, my questions pouring out. I didn’t know if my questions were wrong because I was desperate since it was clear she knew him.
She nodded and said, “I know him. He’s my son.”
“Where is he? I want to see him,” I said.
“He’s been dead for a long time. Today is the 20th anniversary of his death,” she said sadly.
I almost lost my strength upon hearing that, feeling so weak like I couldn’t breathe. My father and others came to help me as I cried in front of his mother and inside their home.
The people in the house helped calm me down, and my parents thanked them for their help and hospitality.
When they saw that I was feeling better, the elderly woman began to tell her story.
“Net was our only child. He was a very good and obedient son, which is why many people liked him because, besides having a good character, he was also handsome. As he grew older, we asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up, and he said he wanted to work for a big company in our country. His father joked, asking why he would dream of that when he could dream of owning his own company since we knew him to be talented and hardworking. He said it was okay, at least it was possible, and if he succeeded, then he would dream of having his own company. We were delighted by his fighting spirit, so we made sure he finished college successfully and got a good job. We were so happy when he achieved that and provided us with everything we needed. He also helped his cousins. We couldn’t ask for more in life but for the continued progress and health of our son,” the elderly woman explained.
She paused before continuing.
“But in life, we face big challenges, and even when everything seems perfect, it’s not enough. His father got sick, and most of his savings went towards hospital expenses until his father passed away. He continued to support us emotionally, even though he was shattered inside. Before my husband died, he advised our son to find a partner in life, but our son said it wasn’t necessary because if he did, I wouldn’t have anyone to be with. So, he never looked for a partner until he also passed away,” she said while wiping her tears.
Despite this, I asked, “Why didn’t he get married?”
“Because he said he already had a wife,” she said, smiling.
“Who was it? Could he have introduced her?” I asked again.
"He never introduced any girlfriend to us. But when he was 25 years old, after his father died, strange things started happening in his life. He stopped working at the company and chose to stay and work here on the farm. One morning, he told us about a dream. He said he met a man and fell deeply in love with him. The man loved him back and fought against his family for their relationship. They lived together and got married. They even went to another country for their honeymoon, where was it again? Ah, yes, it was Bali, Indonesia.
When he lost his job, they moved here to the province to start over. They were happy together, living simply and joyfully. Until one day, my husband was rushed to the hospital due to a heart attack. He was transferred to another hospital, and luckily, his wife(James) had a doctor friend who owned the hospital where he was taken. So, we were very grateful. However, they were separated because of his wife's father, which hurt him deeply. He couldn’t sleep, didn't go to work, and just brooded all the time.
One day, he went back to work, and when he came home, he received a call. It was his wife. They talked and realized they both fell into his wife's father's trap, which led to their separation. When his wife was on his way back here, he didn't show up, and eventually, he(net) passed away," the old woman said.
I started to cry and asked her why.
"Because I had the exact same dream. Because I was his wife," I explained, crying.
She then said, "Did you know he used to ask me if I would accept it if he loved a man? I told him that no matter who he loved, as long as they loved each other, I would accept them wholeheartedly."
"After that night, when I couldn’t come, what happened?"
"He waited for a long time, but his husband never came. He became depressed because he felt let down and that his promise was not fulfilled. That was according to his dream.
In reality, after he told me his story, he tried to dream of it again, to be with and see the person he loved because even in dreams, he felt he loved him and wanted no one else. One day, he didn’t wake up. We tried to wake him, but he was already gone," she said.
I cried even more and told her, "In my dream, that night when I was on my way home to return to him, I lost control of my car because of the heavy rain, and I collided with an oncoming vehicle. And that's why I couldn't come back to him. Because in reality, my dream happened recently, while I was in a coma," I explained.
"Is that so? There's nothing we can do anymore. He’s gone now. He told me he had a sibling there(in the dream )and my husband in his dream survived and got better. But in real life, they both left me, just like his father," she explained, her eyes tearing up.
I couldn’t speak anymore because of the pain he went through. I was happy at first that he wasn’t just a figment of my imagination but a real person. But it hurt to know that our dreams were true, and we existed in different times.
I approached his mother and knelt before her.
"I loved your son very much, even though we never met. But we can't deny our feelings for each other," I said, crying.
She hugged me and said, "Don't cry. I know he wouldn’t want to see tears in your eyes. Just think of it as real, that at least in dreams, you were together," she explained.
Her niece accompanied us to her son's grave. When we arrived, I was so weak and cried, almost embracing and digging up the ground. "I’m here now, my love... I’m here. I’m sorry," I cried and cried.
My parents came and hugged me. They were also crying over my situation. We stayed there for a while as I talked to his grave, laughing, crying, acting like a mad person.
"It hurts so much that we never met... Why did it have to be like this..." I cried again.
Before I knew it, they were helping me up because it was getting dark. I said my goodbyes to him and also to his mother, hugging her tightly before leaving.
We went back to Bangkok, and in my room, I cried so hard, unable to explain my feelings. Was I happy because I knew it was real, that he existed, and loved me even in dreams? But I felt deep sorrow because it was just a dream, and we never met.
I wished we had been together, even for a few years. It hurts so much to know the truth, that " I was ghosted by a ghost."
THE END.....
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Song title: That's Why You Go Away by Michael Learns To Rock.
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THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!
Only reminds me of you (Part 4)
Start from the beginning
