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𝟵 - 𝟮𝟱 - 𝟮𝟮
"I'm so glad we're red heads together Nae." Kailee gushed as she wrapped her hand around Janae's shoulder. Janae smiled softly as they walked through the state fair.
The two friends stopped at the fry truck and waited in line. Janae glanced at her Apple Watch. She had to be at Sergio's house in 2 hours for his mom's birthday dinner.
She'd spend one more hour or less with Kailee, then go home and freshen up so she could be at Sergio's house in time.
Janae had gotten his mother, Janitzy a small gift basket since she didn't know her that well. In it had a $25 gift card from Sephora and another one for Chickfila.
A few skin products and face masks, a Hello Kitty robe, Eos Vanilla Cashmere lotion with a vanilla perfume from Victoria Secret.
Janae still felt bad for standing Sergio up. She could still see his face when she called him and how disappointed he looked.
It was eating her up, and she wanted to make it up to him so bad. She wasn't that type of person. She didn't want Sergio to think of that when he thought of her.
"Did your parents notice?" Kailee asked once more as they moved forward in the line.
Janae quickly gave her order for buffalo fries before moving away from the ordering station. "No it ain't that clear in dark lighting. I have to be in the sun."
"Mm. I bleached my hair, I think that's why mine is more noticeable." Kailee asked as she subconsciously raked a hand through her straight red hair.
"Well ion know how long I can get away wit dis. They gon realize soon, and ima get my ass beat." Janae laughed despite the feeling of anxiety that was very unsettling.
Her parents were traditional, strict Haitians. They didn't play when it came to disobedience, and Janae knew she'd been stepping on thin ice lately.
She still didn't know how she practically got away with sneaking out that one time. All she got was a slap on the wrist, compared to what Jenny got. She couldn't believe they didn't realize she was high too.
Janae decided to dye her hair after she had her breakdown. She felt as if she needed a change in her life. As she smoked— like Jenny told her too- the thought of dying her hair red crossed her mind.
It was a 'thing of the moment' decision and while she always wanted to dye her hair, she didn't want a red.
She wanted a dark brown, to go with her skin color. But as she searched through the hair dyes at the Dollar Tree, she realized she wanted a dark red.
She liked the red on her anyway, and she hoped her parents wouldn't get too mad at it. But that was wishful thinking, they basically got mad at everything.
She smoothed the fly sways on her bun, sighing deeply. "Kailee." She called out. Kailee glanced at her with her head tilted. "I gotta question."
"You still thinkin about become sober?" Kailee immediately asked and Janae nodded.
"Yea. I always go to smoking and I had a whole panic attack—"
"Forreal? Damn why didn't you tell me?"
"It was fast and it ain't even matter after I got a lil high. But even though weed makes me feel better, I feel like it's whats makin me worse." Janae explained.
"I always smoke when I'm stressed and stuff so ion know how to deal with my feelings healthily anymore."
Kailee thought for a moment, tapping her chin in thought. "I mean.. It's what you want, it's your life, fuck whoever says it's not. You could always stop and restart. See how life is sober."
Janae nodded. She liked that. "Ima see cause I feel like I won't be able to go sober right na." Janae laughed.
She still liked to smoke and drink, a little partying on the side. But she knew that—after her small panic attack— it needed to be stopped.
Maybe not entirely, but just enough to get her calm again.
"Bitch I been havin heart burn and a hard time breathing." Kailee laughed and Janae nodded slowly.
"You know what? Me too.. Shit we gotta go sober now." Janae laughed and Kailee joined in, interlocking hands with her.
"Maybe you, but me, ima stay high."
❦
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Janae rang the doorbell with one hand as she held the gift basket in another. She shifted from feet to feet in apprehension.
She hoped his family liked her. She already met his dad and had half met his brother, but she was still nervous about meeting them.
She didn't want them to think stereotypically. She didn't want them to think she wasn't respectful, or because she was black she was ghetto and rude.
Of course, not all people thought like that, but those negative thoughts continued to run through her mind. Janae began to take deep breaths in hope she'd calm down.
