summer school // phan

2

We arrived at Phil's house which was a bit bigger than mine and definitely nicer looking. He unlocked the door and we sat at the dining room table and I started sketching what the volcano could look like. "Well now that we have the design portion done we'll need to make it and make it explode," I said
"Oh yeah..." I wrote down what we would probably need and Phil already had a few things so we went into town to get more supplies. We went into a craft store and I almost died from the amount of colour. We split paying for the stuff half and half and walked back to Phil's house. I won't lie, I wasn't having a terrible time. "Okay! Let's start!" Phil jumped up and down making his jet black, silky hair bounce and his eyes squint of excitement.

It was kind of cute..

Wait. What am I saying.

He stopped being scared of me so it was easier to get things done. Right before we started I got a text.

Text from: Mom
Where are you?

2 missed calls from: Mom

To: Mom
Sorry my phone was off because it's dying and I'm at my lab partner's house

Text from: Mom
Does this friend have a name?

To: Mom
Phil

Text from: Mom
Okay, be back before 8

"Hey Phil? Could I borrow a charger?" I asked and I knew he would have the charger I needed because I noticed we had the same phone.
"Yeah sure" he said as he ran upstairs and soon walked back down and handed me a charger.

---

"Okay!! Now what?" Phil asked after we finished the paper mâché base.
"We have to wait for it to dry"
"Do you want to work on the poem?" He suggests
"Sure"
"I have a computer in my room that we can use"

I nodded and we headed upstairs and he got another chair for me to sit in. Phil opened a Word document to write the poem. "So what should we make it about?" I asked
"Nature?" He suggests looking out the window
"I kind of live in my room"
"Yeah me too"

We both went silent. It wasn't an awkward silence but I didn't know what to say and I don't think Phil did either. My eyes wandered around the room for inspiration. He had a pretty organized room other than a few clothes on the ground. He had posters on his wall. I started reading them. There was a few anime posters, musical artists whom I knew. But then I saw my all time favourite band, Muse. I can't believe he likes Muse! And the rest of the artists like Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance etc and anime's that I recognized too. We actually had a lot in common.

"You like Muse!?" I blurt out, breaking the silence
"Yeah! You too?"
"I love them"
"I actually went to see them in concert about a year ago" he smiled slightly

He had a nice smile.

Stop it Dan. Don't think about it.

"Really? Lucky" I lowered my voice to a normal level
"Hey, I just got an idea! Let's write about music" he turned to me
"Sounds good"

I guess Phil and I weren't as different as I thought but I'm not looking for a friend so it doesn't matter what happens. Phil and I worked on our projects and by the time it was dinner I was about to leave.

"Uh...Dan?" Phil rubbed his arm
"Yeah?"
"D-do you want to e-exchange numbers so I can tell you when the paper mâché is dry and stuff?"
"Sure but don't blow up my phone with messages"
"Got it"

I gave him my phone number and he gave me his.

---

Over the next few days I continued to go over to Phil's house after school to work on our assignments. It was Friday and I was walking to school. Once I got there I saw Phil and he gave a friendly wave to me before someone pulled him off into a different hallway.

---

I sat down in my desk in my English class. Phil was already there and as soon as I sat down he turned around to me.

"Hey I have a question"
"Okay?"
"D-do you want to hang out a-after s-school?"
I wanted to but knew that it was better if we didn't hang out, for Phil's sake, "I can't Phil"
"Maybe another day then?"
"No Phil, I mean you shouldn't hang around people like me" I started standing up
"Dan," he tried speaking but I immediately cut him off
"I CAN'T BE FRIENDS WITH YOU, OKAY?" I asked rhetorically
"I just don't see why"
"It's for the best, just trust me" I plead
"How am I supposed to t-trust you if y-you can't tell me something?"

He turned back around. I actually felt kind of bad. Maybe I was being too harsh; but he needed to stay away from me. He needed to get far away from me. I knew what was happening and last time, everyone got hurt. I dragged everyone down and I didn't want this to happen again with Phil. Why am I such an issue all the time? What's wrong with me. I should just do everyone a favour and leave this world; nobody would miss me anyway.

<Flashback>

"I need to tell you something." I tell my best friend, Pj
"Okay?"
"Ive been thinking about it for a while and...we'll...I-I'm gay"
"Um Dan," he began "I'm not interested in you"
"I didn't say I liked you like that Pj"
He looked up at me with his green eyes burning in my soul, "I can't be friends with you. I'm sorry"

And then he was gone. Just like that.

<end of flashback>

I couldn't let that happen with Phil. That's why I can't be friends with him. I can't let it happen.

I felt myself begin to cry and before any tears were visible, I raised my hand to go to the washroom. I walked into the closest washroom and looked at myself in the mirror. More tears came but I don't myself, 'you're not this weak. don't let think defeat you'. I shouldn't be acting this way because of someone I hardly knew.

A/N

Woah.

Please tell me if I should continue this! I have loads more chapters written!

It'll get better. And you'll understand soon why the book is called 'Summer School'.

Also I just had a thanksgiving dinner a few hours ago and my cousin has a baby and he's the most precious thing. He grabs my glasses (well, tries to) and I don't know it's just really cute

Ok that's all! Hope you liked the chapter!

BYE