Silence Is Golden **WATTYS 2018 LONGLISTED!** The Mancini Connection Book1

23: Lies

Mario waited as I mulled everything over. The simple truth was I'm as barren as a toxic, waste dump. I would never experience pregnancy as he looked at the phone screen. I phrased what I needed to express differently. If you knew you weren't able to have children, would you marry?

I could felt his eyes bore into the side of my face as while considered my question. He typed the answer slowly while glancing at me periodically as he typed. I don't know? If I did, I'd have to be a hundred per cent sure that the other person was ok with it. Not having them, it's a lot to give up, but if you love someone. Then I guess it doesn't matter.

My brother still had a heart as I smiled at what he wrote. This life hadn't taken that from him, at least. I whispered as my voice shook, "I'm the booby prize."

Mario's grip on me tightened. "No, your not! Why on earth, would you think that?"

So many lies.

Mario's hand runs rhythmically through my short hair while my body trembled. Ma sprouted shit about me again, and he believed it. I was saddened as Ma ignored anything linked to my past. Mario would be the first person I'd told, not even Franny, knew.

I type the first four words but didn't stop there. I let it all out.

I had a hysterectomy. I don't think Ma told anyone. So frustrated, I needed one person to listen to me. To believe me! The contract is bullshit! I can't have kids! He has a kid on the way, and I guess I'm ok with that now. Everything is in Nona's name. Papa doesn't own anything. It's been like that since our great grandfather it's a failsafe. To protect the families interests, and if they ever, went to prison?

"We'd never go without," Mario mumbled as I elbowed him in the gut, and I shook my head. When I placed the phone in front of his face letting him read it. Yes

He took the phone. You own everything?"

I nod as I snatched it back and deleted it all from notes so nothing would be there.

Mario, let out a long low whistle I stayed silent as he processed my biggest secrets. Our mother refused to acknowledge or disclose my medical information. For whatever reason, I had stopped caring about what she wanted. Because I was buried underneath the lies and half-truths, suffocating.

It was my life, and it had spun out of control, I couldn't run indefinitely. Nor would I roll over, and play good little wifey. The urge was too great. I longed to carve out my path. Along with the realisation, nobody seemed to be aware that I was the sacrificial lamb. Even after all the lies and deaths over the years, they were still playing games. My life was not a fucking game! I kissed my brother goodnight and wished for a peaceful slumber.

With the worst case of cottonmouth and a killer headache, I rolled over groaning. I hid my head, under the pillow, although It still didn't stop the noise as Sasha sat on the end of the bed. She was playing with her shirt as she whispered, "Your Ma, wants you downstairs now."

"About what?" I croaked as Sasha pointed to the floor as I heard shouts and crying.

Sasha stood. "Don't be, long she's mad, and Mario I've never seen him like this your Ma. She hit him."

That had me out of bed while I swayed as my head spun, and my brain thumped. That was the last time I was drinking as Sasha helped, steady me.

"You're a fucking lightweight, Eva."

I winced at the airy laugh, as it hammered through my head.

"Coffee?" Sasha left as I held my head in one hand, and made my way downstairs to the kitchen. I leaned against the doorway as Sasha placed a coffee in my hands. I then hummed, after the first mouthful as I struggled to ignore the glare that I sent my way.