Rejects | | a.u

.03

  I pick up a book with a black and white cover on it and I start to read the back. I feel Luke’s eyes glued to me. I flick through the pages and try my hardest to ignore him. He keeps moving so he’s in my view. I sigh loudly and slam the book on the shelf.

  “If you take a picture it might last longer.” I say a little louder than I should have. A devious smirk plays across his lips. I narrow my eyes at him. He slowly walks towards me; I turn my back to him. I don’t understand how he ends up wherever I go.  

  He reminded me of this kid named Colton who used to hang around me every living moment of the day. Colton and I used to have this kind of on and off thing going on. It all stopped when he moved to Florida with his mother and step-father because apparently I was like a walking suicide note and he ‘needed a little bit of sunshine in his life’. I have to admit, I was kind of in love with Colton. He was the first one I actually started to believe in until he left me because apparently he couldn’t deal with me being unhappy and all this shit.

  I pick up another book, pretending to read the back of it. I look over my shoulder and I see Luke standing in back of the book shelf behind me, resting his elbows on it, staring at me still. I turn around fully and lean against the shelf.

  “What are you doing in a library? Let alone on a Saturday morning.” He smirks, tugging on his lip ring.

  “I could ask you the same thing, Sawyer.” I roll my eyes at him.

  “How do you know my last time?”

  “Number one: I sit beside you in history. Number two: you always write your full name when I don’t write my name at all.”

  “That’s a bad habit, Hemmings.”

  Luke looks really strange standing in a library. His all black attire and messy hair hidden by a burgundy snapback make him look like some douche whose natural habitat would be in some random girl’s bedroom on a Saturday night, let alone in a library on a Saturday morning.  He looks really out of place and anxious.

  “Why do you look so nervous?” I ask him. He takes his book bag off his shoulder and sets it on top of the shelf. He pulls out a binder and a history text book. Luke doesn’t say anything; he just flips the book open to the chapter we started reading in history the other day and pushes it towards me.

  “Number six.” He says, pointing to the question. He almost looks embarrassed to be asking for help. I look at him confused; I narrow my eyes at him. He rubs the back of his neck.

  “In Shakespeare’s will, what was the one thing he mentioned about his wife? Support your answer with details from the passage.” I read out loud to myself, hoping Luke was paying attention. And he was. “I thought you would have just copied everything off me yesterday.” I say a little too sarcastic. Luke rolls his eyes.

  “I wanted to do it myself.” I can’t help but laugh. “You know what? Fuck you. If you’re not gonna help then I’m leaving.”  He jams everything back into his book bag and slings it over his shoulder.

  “I give unto my wife my second best bed with the furniture”. I say loud enough for him to hear. He instantly turns around, he flashes me his legendary smirk.

  “How the hell do you know that?”

  “Because I wrote it down five minutes ago you asshole.”

  “Actually,” he points his finger at me for dramatic effect. “Five minutes ago you were staring at me. The sexual tension was just soooo much to handle.” I make gagging noises as he walks away. This little incident reminds me of Colton and I. This is something we used to do. It still fucking hurt.

 

-

  I slave over my laptop some more when there’s a knock on my bedroom door. I groan and shut my laptop. I run my hands through my hair, attempting to make myself presentable because one day I am still praying it’ll be a cute boy coming to my rescue with all however many Bring It On movies and a big bowl of popcorn.

  “Come innnnn.”

  Asami opens the door, looking like a mess. She slumps down on my bed, her hair all tangled and she looks out of it. I quickly shut the door and take off her muddy boots before she gets mud anywhere. She was normally like this if she got a hold of alcohol. She’s never actually found out her limits. She just drinks until she’s done then shows up at my place.

  “Asami, what happened?”

  “Nothing.” She smiles sadly. I sigh and sit beside her. She lays her head on my shoulder.

  “Seriously, what happened?”

  “Found a couple drinks in the fridge. I had a couple drinks. Michael came over. He left as soon as he saw me drinking.”  I she lays her head in my lap, I play with her hair. This was a normal thing for us. One of us would go to each other’s houses whenever we needed someone to lean on. Janet had even given Asami and key to the house to watch over me when she goes on her monthly business trips to the children’s hospitals in New York. Cassie would have done it but she’s in the works of moving into an apartment with Ashton.

  “How many drinks are a couple?”

  “Six.” I let out a deep sigh and grab the Advil off my side table and the water bottle out of my book bag.  I motion for her to sit up and she leans against the pillow. I hand her the two pills and the bottle of water.  I throw a pair of pajama pants at her and climb into the top bunk. Thank god Janet had a genius idea of bunk beds or else I’d be sleeping on the floor, due to the simple fact that Asami does not like to share beds at all – awake or not.

  I lay awake staring at the lame little glow in the dark stars that have been up on my ceiling for the last six years, somehow they were still glowing. Stars remind me of people in a way. I’d rather become a star in the sky and watch over someone than go to heaven; they seem like the same place. I like to think my parents and brother became stars. It seems a lot more peaceful and I know where they are in the sky.  

  I feel my eyes finally start to get heavy and I feel myself doze off.

 

 I’m in the car again, driving.  It’s dark and foggy all over again.  I can hardly see the road. I keep my hands on the wheel, gripping it tightly. It’s like there are four roads in front of me instead of one. Everything feels the same as the dream I had a few days ago. Maybe this is just a dream.

   My vision is messed up and I feel dizzy and like I could pass out any second. It feels like my head is spinning. I taste the bitter taste of alcohol on my lips all over again. The funny thing is, I’ve still never had it.

  A bright light makes an appearance from around the corner. I continue tightening my grip on the wheel. From the corner of my eye I see a tall boy standing in the middle of the road. My vision isn’t even messed up when I look at him. I swerve into the next lane. Out of nowhere a car comes around the corner, smashing into the front of me. I feel my head hit off the window and the air bags explode into my face. I struggle to breathe.

  My head pounds as I try to sit up a little bit. I’m aching all over. It feels like a thousand pounds of bricks have been dropped on my body all at once. I see a boy like in my last dream sitting in a chair, chewing on a straw. Luke. I study him. He has a few bruises and a couple scratches but he looks fine.

  “What happened?” I ask and his face suddenly drops. He leans forward in his chair. He takes a deep breath as I prepare for the worst. I manage to sit up a little and he hands me a cup of water. 

 “You saved me.”

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  I'm honestly not too sure why this is rated R? I mean whatever but it's a lil weird. Whatever thoougghh, thank you for reading! - Gillian