If it kills me, then so be it.

I didn't go to the bar for five days straight

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I didn't go to the bar for five days straight. I had a lot of studying to do and I prefer to do it in the library when I have everything I need available at the reach of my hand. I don't usually have to learn a lot before tests since I have a good memory and I remember a lot from just listening in class, but I still like to read more on topics that I find interesting and just go an extra mile. Not for the grade, but for myself.

I never cared much about being the best student. I mean, my behaviour is anything but good. I'm a no-bullshit person. I don't tolerate disrespect. If anyone has to say something about me, I make them say to my face. And they quickly think twice about saying their thoughts about me.

I don't care what they talk behind my back. I care what they say to my face. Pussies don't interest me.

Five days after not going to the bar, I finally go back. I have to say I kind of missed it. This became one of my habits, too.

Harper gives me a smile when she sees me. We haven't seen each other much these past days, either, but we talked over the phone.

Josh, the security guy, greets me with, "And we thought you forgot about us already!"

I grin. "Not going to happen," I tell him. I love how welcomed I feel here. Like many other people, but each for different reasons.

It's one of the rare nights I didn't bring any books or notebooks with me as well because I'm planning on leaving early. I agreed to come to work early tonight because we're hosting a special event and it's going to be crowded. Even more crowded than usual. That's why it's one of the rare nights I just sit at the bar and enjoy being where I am.

I don't look around the bar. I don't care who's here.

"Hey, Kadie. Finished with studying already?" Harper asks me.

I give her a knowing smile. "The day I'll stop learning new things is the day I die, Harper, dear."

Harper chuckles. "Dear God, I wish I had your motivation and hunger for learning."

I put my chin on my hand under my chin to support it. "I just like knowing things, Harp. That's it." And that really is it. I just like knowing stuff. "I'm going home earlier tonight," I say.

Harper's face becomes serious. "Home or my place?" Harper asks.

"Home," I lie. I can't really tell her where I'm going and if I said anything else, it'd be suspicious.

"Alright, then," Harper says. Harper got used to me staying at her place most of the time. She didn't ask me many questions as to why I don't like staying at home. She just thinks I don't get along with my parents. And that's the truth, but she doesn't know the real reasons behind it.

I get off the stool. "Are you going already?" Harper asks.

"No, I'm just going out for a cigarette," I say.

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