I lost my fear of falling (way brothers)

I lost my fear of falling

"Gerardddd let me see your book", I whinned trying to snatch the book from my brother's hands.

"No Mikey! There's private stuff in here", he said bringing it high above his head far from my reach.

"Gimme!"

"No, Mikey! Respect my privacy bro, I respect yours!"

"Fine! I just don't get why we have secrets from each other, we're brothers, I wish you'd open up more to me...", I muttered and walked out the room shutting the door behind me.

The next morning I was getting ready for my usual morning walk. I took walks all the time. I was looking around for my phone when I walked past Gerard's bedroom, my eyes landed on the navy-blue sketch book on his desk. My eyes travelled across the room to my brother who was snoring away in deep slumber. I had a sneaky thought on my mind, a smirk crawled its way on my face. I swiftly glided my way into the room and plucked the book from the desk, rushing out the door, closing it carefully behind me. I held the book in front of me in glory as though I'd just found gold. I grabbed my keys and left home for the park so I could indulge in my brother's prized possession in better lighting. Anywhere near home was dark and dingy like Dracula's coffin.

I stood at the side of the nearby river canal resting my elbows on the cool rusted metal railings. I held in my excitement and breathed in and out with quivering breaths. "I got it. I got the book. All these years of dying of curiousity. Finally", I said softly to myself. I flipped open the cover and my jaw dropped. I flipped through the pages of amazing artwork. Vibrant colours filled every corner of every page and I was fucking impressed. Hues of red, green, blue and orange so brilliantly dispatched....No wonder Gerard always slayed art in school. But... something made my eyebrows furrow and my mouth close slowly. His artworks were amazing, but there was so much blood. So much gore, so much explicit content in them. There were drawings of hanging people, gruesome gunfights and murder scenes. What scared me most was the fact that there was blood in almost every page...and it looked real. Red splattered across the paper. It looked so very real. With shaky hands I slowly brought the book to my nose. I breathed in the scent of the paper, praying to smell the poisonous stench of paint. It was the smell of blood, real blood.The metallic scent made my knees quiver and my feet stood rooted to the ground. I was horrified. That's when a fucking huge ass butterfly decided to fly into my face causing me to jump and drop the book into the canal. FUCK. I watched it tumble down into the murky brown water. Without thinking, I leapt in after it. Way to go Mikey Fucking Way. Having a huge fear of water had me panicking nd flailing my arms and legs about.But I had to get the book. It was my brother's closest possession. The current was strong, I was violently trying to keep myself afloat, sucking in the muddy canal water through my nose and mouth.The pain stung my lungs. I grabbed hold onto a solid object before knocking my head against the canal walls, causing me to black out.

Next thing I knew I started opening my eyes to see pure white everywhere.
Oh my god am I dead?! Did that actually kill me?
My vision started becoming clear, I tried turning my head to look around but my head hurt like a mother fucker. I saw a dark figure right in front of my face.
It took about 2 minutes for me to finally realize Gerard was in my face. He kept saying my name worriedly with wide eyes and asking if I could hear him.
I could bloody well hear him just about fine.

"Y-yeah I can hear you, jeez...your voice is making my ears ring", I managed to spit out annoyed.

"Mikey you're okay!", he said clamping his hands over his mouth,looking as though he were about to cry, "I was so worried about you please don't ever do that again"

"Wh-where am I??", I asked determined to find out whether I was dead or just being paranoid.

"You're in the hospital Mikes, apparently you almost drowned in a canal?"