Tones: PINK "The Bravest"

030

Tiningnan niya ako ng galak. Sinubukan ko rin na ngumiti ng malaki kagaya na pero hindi ko talaga magawang maging sincere sa ginagawa ko. Tinitingnan niya ako sa mata na parang ako lang ang nakikita niya pero hindi naman ako ganun ka komportable hindi kagaya noong una ko pang inamin sa sarili ko na gusto ko siya.

Somehow I managed to glance at where Klara was looking at us. Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero parang mas gusto kong siya yung nasa harapan ko ngayon kaysa sa sariling girlfriend ko.

I imagined her in front of me. Finally she's looking at me with that responsibe eyes of her, the only place where I can see how vulnerable she can be. Her eyes that held on to what I can feel about her.

My train of thoughts were cut off with the start of the music and Neisha was once again in front of me. Klara nowhere near me.

Nginitian ko si Neisha tapos nagsimula na kaming sumayaw. I guided her throughout the first parts of our routine tapos maayos lang naman ang mga nangyayari sa sayaw eh, we're doing well kasi ang iba nga naghihiyawan na.

Habang sumasayaw kami at ang iba nagkakanchawan naman hindi ko maiwasan na mapadako ang tingin ko kay Klara.

Kahit anong gawin ko ngayon sa kanya talaga napupunta atensiyon ko.

Klara was also staring at me with her usual blank face yet her eyes held that gleam that I began to grow fond of.

"Baby!" hindi ko na namalayan na ang tagal ko na palang nakatingin kay Klara until mas diniin ni Neisha yung pagkakahawak niya sa balikat ko ng mas mahigpit pa. Unlike the last time that I looked at her, Neisha was silently seething at me for not showing any attention to her.

I couldn't help but to feel slightly guilty at that. Ang girlfriend ko na matagal ko nang hinintay ay nasa harap ko na, kasayaw ko pero nasa iba naman ang atensiyon ko.

That's it, Damien.

You're a real jerk.

"I'm getting mad baby, what are you thinking about?" sabi sakin ni Neisha at ipinaikot ko na muna siya nung napansin kong pinaikot rin ng iba ang mga kapartner nila. Napahinga naman ako ng malalalim dahil muntik na kaming magkamali dahil dun.

"Neisha, it's nothing okay" sabi ko nalang sa kanya. Hindi ko maiwasan na isipin ang tagal naman matapos ng practical exam na ito.

"You keep spacing out. Hindi mo na ako pinapansin. Hindi mo na ako pinakikinggan. You're just like Caldrin now. You're bad like him"

I groaned at that. "Neisha will you stop comparing me to your ex boyfriend" pagalit na saad ko sa kanya. These days kasi kung magkakamali ako sa kanya parati nalang niya dinadagdag si Caldrin sa usapan. Naiinis ako. Ginawa niya ba akong boyfriend para lang may ipamukha kay Caldrin na may nahanap na siyang mas magaling kaysa sa kanya o ano?

"Why would I stop. Kagaya ka lang naman niya eh. I expected much from you when I made you my boyfriend. I thought you'll like me too much to be there for me but I was wrong"

"I was always there for you pero hindi ko magawang maging nandiyan sayo na kasama ang standards mo" hindi ko na namalayan pa na basic step nalang ang pinaggagawa namin ni Neisha kasi nawala ako sa pokus.

Ernest was there looking at us weirdly and questioning but I wasn't going to give him attention, not when Neisha is about to throw a tantrum like this.

I can feel Neisha radiate with anger when the hands she used to hold me were getting tighter and stronger. I am going to stand my ground like this. This time hindi ako bibigay sa inaakala niyang tama.

"My standards are not the problem. Ikaw yung problema kasi hindi ka naman nag e-effort maging ganun para sakin"

"I don't need to change myself for you Neisha. I became your boyfriend to like you the way I know of. Not the way you wanted me to be. Were different"