Sinister [Jason McCann]

Thirty-Four

 

Yes, I could have easily said “I love you too” but I...couldn’t. And as farcical as it may appear to be, I don’t understand what held me back.

 

Sighing, I sat up and ran a hand through the disastrous mess of hair on my head. The clock was zeroing in on six o’clock and it was a dysfunctional saturday evening. I took a drag of the cigarette and turned my head slightly, eyeing the medication on my dresser and my phone directly beside it. I reached out lazily and grabbed a hold of my phone, smoke finding it’s exit through my nostrils.

 

Three days after that episode, Ace sparked up the conversation of Lea. Coming from Lana, it was said that Lea and I were no longer together, according to what Lea thinks since there was no other way of putting it. Since then, I have yet to stop thinking about whether she still feels animosity towards my mistakes. I knew Lea, she was forgiving. Probably as forgiving as Jesus Christ himself.

 

Yet, you can pretend the ink never touched the paper, but you’ll always know exactly where the mistake was made.

 

Sucking my tooth, I look through the contacts on my phone. Girls, girls and just a never ending list of girls with names ranging from A to Z. All of whom, I ignored completely no matter how spellbinding their bodies or voices were. Now that I was single, I was open to seeing at least one girl, or two if I were really in the mood to fuck around. I haven’t had a good fuck in longer than a few months when, before meeting Lea, the longest period of time it’d take for me to get another chick would be three to five days.

 

My finger scrolls upwards and I try to recall the faces of most of these girls as I’m reading their names. Ultimately, I fall upon a girl named Christina and come to a quick decision. To prevent myself from initiating a feeling of remorse or guilt, I wasn’t planning on having full out sex with this girl. Instead, I’d just get my dick sucked, what better way to ease my nerves? And if anyone were to be offended by my unanimous decision, they can drop to their knees and suck my dick too.

 

Lea’s POV --

 

That sweet smell of roast beef was invading my entire house.

 

I had been asleep, prior to smelling the delicious cuisine my mother was in the middle of making. Remaining asleep was nearly impossible and once my stomach began to cry for some well needed attention, I knew my long rest was over. I sat in the kitchen, eyes fixed on the dresses displayed on my phone. I scrolled passed each one, my eyes widening with every new design that engulfed my vision. My father was in the living room, as usual, catching up on a few boxing matches he missed the passed weekends and preparing himself for a brand new match at ten o’clock.

 

Mother was humming a song I knew completely by heart, since it was her favorite and she’s played it since I was very young. The song was “Listen to Your Heart” and normally, I’d join in on the humming because I, too, had a deep infatuation for that song. Under these circumstances, I wouldn’t be singing along because the lyrics were ironically connected to my situation.

 

“Lea, you know Lana will be here soon.” My mother saved me from sinking into my depressing thoughts, “And she’s bringing a guest so why don’t you go take a shower and fix your hair? Look presentable.”