chapter 22- silent

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he clicked his tongue at the girl on her couch, he walked over and slapped her ass. efficiently waking her up she screamed at the unfamiliar face standing over her.

"go ahead and leave for me, honey.", after she closed the door he turned around with a stern look. throwing dagger at billie who stiffly shuffled in her spot, tiny feet not knowing what to do.

he glanced at her skin and a disturbance fell upon his condescending expression.

"you know i thought you've been doing just fine in here, the casual smell of heavy weed just constantly here. turns out, you're a fucking pig, lookin' like a pig, living like a pig.", he picked up multitudes of bottles, clanking then together as he dragged over her vomit bin.

"you could get liver cancer, kidney failure, heart problems. does that not scare you, billie? the fact you could die at any time?! you had us thinking you were doing just fine without that girl! without all this! without destroying yourself the worst way possible.", he threw the unopened pill bottle at her head.

"i don't have that, stokes. calm your man titties.", he scoffed at her when she waved a hand at him and his words.

"i've been working out actually, you should probably think about the same.", she growled at him and sat back down heavily. the couch moved back with her weight.

"i'm doing just fine on my own.", she grumbled, he walked over and slapped her head. he grabbed her arm and dragged her up to her feet.

"get the fuck in the shower. i'm making you food and i'm going to watch as you eat every single bit of it until you're stuffed with actual protein than this shit.", she grunted as stokeley pushed her to the hall.

sighing as she picked up a liquor bottle she planned on laying on her bed and drinking the rest of it, only to have it snatched out of her grasp.

"what the fuck?!", she shouted, her alcoholic tendencies caused an unknown anger rise from her.

"don't fucking yell at me. we might be in your house but you have no right to disrespect me when you've put yourself at the lowest pedestal. i've had multiple people walk up to me, your fans, come up to my face and ask if you were okay. you know what i had to say? i had to lie and say you were doing just fine.", his voice cracked when he looked to her attire, counting each stain on her clothing.

"i'm sorry..", she whispered, walking towards her bedroom. she heard him sniffle and sigh before walk away.

she hated to see her friends hearts breaking over her.

___

when she enters her bathroom, the harsh light burned her eyes, making her squint. she peeled off her clothes she hadn't changed in weeks, it reeked of alcohol and marijuana.

her nose inspected her scent, causing her to gag. she was definitely a little more than ripe. she didn't look at herself in the mirror, too ashamed to see how her actions affected her physical appearance.

ignoring how scorching hot the water was, she stood under the fall, letting it wash away the first layer of dirt and sweat. she leaned her head against the wall, sobbing before covering her chapped mouth. she could hardly hold herself up on her own.

all she's done is sit on the couch, stare at a wall blankly and drink like the bottle was full of water. her bank didn't get a dent in it, cash constantly flowing in, she could buy as many cases or bottles as she desired. painfully, she abandoned finneas, who left her voicemails crying about he couldn't do it on his own. that he missed her and she hoped he reached out to him, he was probably the most worried.

          

like a tidal wave, all her problems and pain from the past hit her since she didn't have a distraction to take it all away. she wasn't in control of anything about her life anymore.

squirting a large amount of shampoo in her hand she reveled in the smell of vanilla and coconut. the lovely smell finally breaching her clogged nose. being in this state, it brought lots of disgusting and disturbing things.

thoroughly washing her body, she scrubbed off the dead skin and scabs with the small amount of power she held in her hands.

assuming stokeley was knocking on her door, she waited until he spoke to answer whatever he wanted.

"i made food for you, i'm gonna be staring at you the entire time. i know you hate that shit, but it's necessary.", she grimaced at the thought of being stared at while eating.

"that's creepy and annoying. you're creepy and annoying.", he snorted.

"i care about you, i'm not creepy.", for the first time in a long while her lips cracked into a small smile.

"you're still creepy.", she received no answer, probably because he walked away.

she finished up, the whole shower she blindly ran the scrubber down her body. she felt how her body changed, how it contorted into mush and flab. stepping out of the glass shower she stared at the mirror finally, covering her mouth in a cry. her skin was borderline yellow and gray, no longer pale and healthy.

everything was jaundice and discolored, nothing about her looked the same. if anything got better is that her dick got bigger but that was about it. she could still pride herself about something.

she carelessly threw her damp towel onto the back of a chair, hoping it would dry out in the position it was in. she took out a white tank top and black sweatpants, not caring about a bra, stokeley didn't care. it was like he was her brother.

as she was walking out the smell of a buffet entered her nose, making it twitch. she saw her friend standing at the stove, an apron around his waist and singing barbie girl.

"you look like you're having fun.", he jumped, throwing the spatula into the air. she saw he was making a fifth omelette.

"fuckin' scared the shit out of me. sit down and eat, bud.", he pointed at the island counter with the metal spatula he picked back up.

"this is a lot, stokes. who are you feeding besides us? i'm gonna get fat.", she smiled lightly, her teeth were still sparkling white. the second thing she hated the most was terrible breath. drinking excessively caused her to brush it more, which resulted in blinding pearls she liked to call teeth.

"bro, put your flashlight mouth away, stupid. it's for you, and you're already fat. you need to work out, you lost your muscles bro", he sat down across from her, leaning his elbows on the table. doing exactly what he said earlier he stared directly at her, then down to her plate, then back up at her.

she looked at her flabby arms, poking her stomach discreetly to make sure it was real. she almost nearly fit her old baggy clothes from years ago, no longer fitting loosely.

"yeah i know i'm getting fat..", she mumbled as she took a large bite of her food.

"your jawline used to cut diamonds themselves, vro. what happened?", she narrowed her eyes and cupped her face, insecurity rising.

"your cheeks are full of flesh, where's your cheekbones? shit used to be poppin'. your thighs jiggle, it even makes me embarrassed to look at them.", her face grew hot, she was probably a tomato in the face as well.

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