Heat Of The Moment (Waycest)

Nothing Gets Grossed Out

"Mikes!" Gerard yelled, shaking Mikey's shoulder, backing away as to not be hit as Mikey took a large breath in and bolted upright.

The taste of the cold lips he longed for felt so real....so close. Mikey was becoming obsessed. It wasn't fair. Frank got this sexy beast all to himself and he was stuck in the brotherzone. *Sigh*

Mikey's lips still buzzed with what he thought was a real kiss... it felt as much. He wanted it to be as much. Mikey, shivering and forgetting Gerard was there, took off his gross sweat covered shirt, revealing toned muscles as he hobbled over to his dresser sleepily for a different shirt. Gerard's faded Nirvana shirt it was.

"Holy shit!" Mikey yelled when he heard Gerard's chuckle from across the room.

"Sorry, Mikey, I thought I threw that out."

"Nope." Mikey grinned, hoping back into bed. Gerard sat down next to him, wiping sweat soaked hair off Mikey's forehead.

"Night, Mikes." Gerard whispered as he watched his brother doze off, forgetting why he woke him up in the first place. Probably another nightmare. Gerard's lips softly pressed to Mikey's forehead as soon as he was sure Mikey was sleeping.

"Sweet dreams, brother." Gerard whispered.

What Gerard didn't know, however, was that Mikey could hear him. Could feel his lips softly pressing to his. It was a real kiss.

"I'll miss you, brother." Gerard whispered against Mikey's unmoving lips. Mikey felt himself being dragged under the waves of sleep and confusion as the floorboards squeaked.

...

"Where's Gerard?" Mikey asked through a yawn, sleepily rubbing his eyes as he went straight to the coffee mug, noticing his brothers absence.

"He's gone." Donna Way sniffled.

"What?" Mikey asked, mortified as the coffee cup flattered to the floor, spilling coffee all over himself and the floor. "What do you mean-"

Mikey's mother gave him a note spotted with coffee and tears and scrawled in Gerard's messy handwriting.

"Mikey,

I'm sorry. I'll miss you, I really will. You're the only person I really can call my friend...don't try to find me, please.

Momma,

I love you. Please take care of Mikey. Make sure he goes to school. Don't let him turn out like I did. I'm happy now, promise.

-Your one and only Geebear."

The note brought tears to Mikey's eyes. Gee was...gone? Forever? No. Mikey refused to accept it, slamming the paper down in the table and making his mother flinch. He slipped on his dirty converse, throwing on a coat and marching out of the house.

He will find Gerard. He will. No matter what.

"Gerard!" Mikey yelled, spotting his brother sitting by a bridge, staring at the water. Gerard comes here when he needs to clear his head, needed inspiration, needed peace. Was confused.

"Mikey!" Gerard chirped, running to his brother before abruptly stopping four feet away from him. "I told you not to try and find me." Gerard stated.

"But I couldn't just-"

"You can." Gerard took a deep breath. "And you will."

"Gerard-"

"Don't say it." Gerard clenched his teeth together.

"You're not dad, Gerard!" Mikey yelled.

"I'm not dad, don't you dare-"

"You're sure as Hell acting like it!" Mikey snapped. He was now in control of this conversation. "You are leaving mom and I all alone again! But this time we are missing a certain some one who's happiness gave us both strength!"

"Mikey, I-"

"Don't, Gerard." Mikey hissed.

"Mikey, I love you!" Gerard begged.

"Is that why you're skipping out on me?!" Mikey shouted.

"No, I just-"

"Bye, Gerard." Mikey whispered, turning on his heel and walking away, leaving Gerard in the dust as both of their eyes clouded with tears.

Gerard didn't know what to do. He could chase after Mikey, but maybe this is what he needed. Maybe now Mikey wouldn't come after him. Gerard sighed, staring into the water as if it would unlock life's mysteries to him. He knew the way he felt about his brother was wrong...unhealthy. He knew it would hurt Mikey in the long run and that was something Gerard was determined not to do.

Then again, what had he just done?

Life is such a painful thing. What was wrong with him? What would he do without his little Mikey?

Mikey didn't understand why his feet kept taking him further away from Gerard when all he wanted to do was wrap his brother in his arms. He also didn't understand why Gerard wanted him gone. It hurt, really it did.

Mikey was fucking in love with him, no matter how sick it was, and he just wanted to be with his brother all the time. This, of course, wasn't helping the case at all.

Mikey's breathing hitched in his throat as tears poured down his face in waves, his shoulders violently shaking with sobs he was trying to suppress. What if Gerard found out? What if Gerard hates him now?

"Did you find him, M-"

"No." Mikey snapped, stomping past his mother and into his bedroom, tears drying on his face as new ones poured down.

"Fucking Gerard!" Mikey yelled, blasting The Smashing Pumpkins, desperately trying to suppress the painful memories the action caused as he kicked a hole in the wall.

Mikey sunk down to his knees, burying his transposed face in his knees as he sobbed, reaching around his bedroom blindly for a neglected case if beer. He hardly ever drank.

Right now, however, Mikey craved the burning sensation in the back of his throat as he gulped down the alcohol. He carved the bitter taste that reminded him of Gerard. He carved feeling numb. He carved forgetting.

He wanted to forget the empty feeling in his heart, he wanted it to stop. He wanted everything to stop.

He felt his breathing speed up as he clutched his stomach.

He couldn't get enough air into his lungs, he was going to die.

He was having a panic attack.

He needed Gerard.

Gerard was the only thing that calmed him down and made these things better, made everything seem okay.

"Mikey?" Said man could faintly hear his name being called. "Mikes?" The voice got louder as Mikey felt a hand on his shoulder, shaking him.

"Stand up, Mikey!" A strong voice commanded and Mikey did as he was told, eyes screwed shut.

"Deep breaths, come on Mikey." The voice was panicked but desperately trying to stay strong. "Come on, Mikes, you're okay."

Mikey started breathing normally, opening his swollen eyes.

"Gerard?" He whimpered. "Gerard!" Mikey shouted, throwing himself into Gerard's arms, soaking Gerard's shirt in his tears as they cried together, relief consuming them both. Mikey almost died. Gerard saved him. Gerard cared.

"I could never leave my little Mikey." Gerard whispered, his hand cupping Mikey's face in his big hands. "I love you, Mikes." Gerard whispered, gently pressing his loos to Mikey's. It was soft and sweet, mixed with tears and agony. Want and pain.

It was a kiss desperate for answers and a kiss that made them both realize they needed the other.