Levi
He kissed me out of nowhere.
And it wasn't a simple kiss to me, it was my first kiss. He had stolen it and I was glad it was him, it was Erwin.
No one was at school and we were in the restroom, the one that I was supposed to be cleaning. But instead, I was moaning his name while he began to take off my clothes. I soon felt his strong hands unzip my pants and take out my penis. Erwin's hand covered it all and began to massage it.
This felt completely different to me. Because although I had masturbated before, no one has ever done it for me
And as I got lost in his beautiful sky blue eyes, I knew I was going to lose my virginity right there.
Because I had never been with a man before, much less a woman.
Erwin asked me if it was ok, and I said yes.
At that time, I didn't tell him that I was a virgin. Even now, I think that he still doesn't know that I gave my virginity to him, maybe he suspects it, I don't know.
I thought I would enjoy it and I did ... But why did I feel so empty after we finished?
Was it because I lost my virginity at a restroom? Is it because after we finished, Erwin just left?
I don't know ... but even now, even today ...
I still feel dirty.
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"Are you alright Levi?"
Your voice made Levi snap out of his thoughts. He didn't know why he was thinking about that right now, especially since he was with you.
Today, the two of you decided to go on a 'date' Levi didn't want to go but he still felt that he was deeply in your debt.
But it was strange too, you two weren't the best of friends. Just co-workers and you hoped that date could break down a few walls in between you two.
"Yeah, sorry I was just spacing out," he says. "But tell me ... Why did you bring me to this place?"
You didn't want to be obvious, much less rude to Levi. But even he should know that you brought him to this place for obvious reasons.
"Hey, the perfect date is therapy!" you say as you smile. You look around the waiting room, this was a place that you knew very well. You had been here a couple of times before. "Talking to someone is always good."
"I don't need therapy," Levi looks at you and he knew that his response wasn't the best. It wasn't that he didn't need therapy, there was a reason why he didn't want to come but he was very embarrassed to say so.
"... I am sorry, I can't afford a therapist."
He looks away as he didn't want to see you, but you could try and bring him some comfort. Sitting next to him, you gave him a small path on his back and slowly caressed it.
"There's nothing to worry about, everything is paid for!"
"What?" Levi looks back at you in surprise and the moment you meet his ocean eyes, you felt heat going to your cheeks. "...Are you paying this for me too? I don't need you to do that!"
You remember the night you took Levi to the hospital, the day he tried to commit suicide. It was a night you didn't want to remember nor make Levi remember. "Don't worry about it, my friend is a therapist and she won't charge you ... She is really nice, so you will be in good hands."
"Mr. Levi Ackerman?"
Levi and you heard the receptionist call Levi's name. At that, the two of you stand up, and almost with a plea, Levi's eyes said it all. It was as if he was begging for you to come with him as if he was scared of being left alone.
But even you knew that this was something he needed to face by himself.
"You will be fine, I promise," you say as you try to reassure him. "I'll be back to pick you up in an hour."
"Where are you going?"
"I'll go visit Nicholas at his bakery, I'll bring you some cupcakes from there."
Levi stood quiet for a moment as if there was something he wanted to tell you but couldn't find the words. He seemed hesitant and even annoyed but he only sighed and looked away.
"Fine."
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Erwin.
I have to admit that when I looked at them being so close, I felt terrified.
And I thought of declaring my love for Levi right there, just to make it clear.
That no one should ever have him but me.
Why do I even feel jealous? When I know that my relationship with Levi is nothing more but just a relationship based on lust.
Because there's this woman ... Who I deeply love.
I met her last year at the annual teacher conference. Every year, teachers from kindergarten to high school meet since we are all under the same district. It's not only Titan high school, there is Titan Jr. High and Titan Elementary School.
And I met her there, she is a kindergarten professor. Her name is Marie. I never believed in love at first sight, but the moment my eyes met hers, I just knew.
I knew that I was blessed because the universe allowed me to live in the same time period as her.
And as I talked to her more, the more I would fall for her. And everything I've done, it's for her. I made myself the promise that the moment I become principal of Titan Highschool, I will court her.
Because right now, a mere teacher is not worthy of her. Being a principal won't change much either, but at least it will allow me to offer her more stability, maybe I can impress her.
And I know I am being cruel.
Cruel towards Levi because I am making him do all these things. I wanted Levi to date a woman, not because I couldn't do it, But because I didn't want Marie knowing I was seeing someone else.
But to be honest ... I don't even know at this point either.
Because I am enjoying too much the relationship I have with Levi.
Maybe too much.
Maybe ... Just maybe ... I love him too.
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Levi began to feel a little bit anxious when ten minutes have passed and you haven't shown up to pick him up yet. The therapy session had gone well, Maria's friend, Leah, seemed like a reliable person. Levi was glad that Leah didn't ask too many personal questions at the beginning, after all, Levi wasn't one to open up to people too fast and the therapist had seemed to pick up on that.
And now that he was done for today, he slightly felt better, if it wasn't because you were making him wait.
"I am here!"
Levi turns to look at you coming towards him. You looked agitated, your clothes looked wrinkled and loose, your hair a bit of a mess and you were out of breath.
"Sorry, I am late, how did everything go?"
But Levi didn't answer your question as he stood up from his chair and began to look at you, up and down. You had to admit that you felt nervous at his act but just followed along.
Levi inspected every single little thing about you. Your skirt that was crooked, the blouse that had a couple of buttons popped out, you agitated respiration.
A damn hickey that was on your neck.
"It went fine," Levi says as he walks past you.
He wasn't stupid, he knew very well what you were doing an hour ago and with who.
And he didn't know why ... But it made him angry.
"Well, that's good to hear," you say as you followed him closely. He looked angry and you didn't even know why. Walking past the exit door, and finally getting some fresh air, you tried your best to catch up to him, he was a fast walker. Either that or he was just plain angry.
"Are you sure everything went fine? You seemed a bit angry."
"Yes, it went fine,"
Levi kept talking on the side of the street as he passed a few restaurants and cafes. He had nowhere in particular to go, he was just walking for the sake of it.
"Ah good, well then, I was thinking ... Do you want to go to the carnival?"
At your question Levi stops walking, he turns around to look at you, and although you seemed more relaxed, the scene still bothered him.
"I shouldn't care, she can sleep with whoever she wants ... but why does it bother me?"
"No," Levi says.
"Why not?"
"Why don't you invite Nicholas instead? I am sure he would love to go with you."
It went quiet. And the only thing that could be heard was the wind, a few tweets of birds, and the chatter of the people in the nearby cafes.
You were wondering if it was that obvious that you were intimate with Nicholas just an hour ago. Maybe it was the clothes or that because you were out of breath ... Or maybe because you reeked of his cologne.
"... But I want to go with you."
For fucks sake.
Now Levi felt guilty and angry. Guilty because he didn't want to make you feel sad nor embarrassed, after all, there was literally nothing attaching you to him. And he felt angry because he didn't know why the fuck he was feeling that way. Why was he angry that you had a hickey? It was just a hickey, come on.
Levi began to take off his black jacket and with one movement he threw it at you. Now you had it in your hands and you looked at him with wonder.
"Wear that and I go with you, don't take it off."
You didn't know why but you still decided to accept the offer. Levi on the other hand thought that as long as he doesn't see the hickey, he will be able to make it through the night.
"Let's get this over with."
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The carnival was only in the city once a month for two days, on the weekends only. It was organized by the city and it was a great opportunity for high school students to volunteer so they could enhance their university applications.
"I hate selling tickets! Couldn't we be assigned to another stand?" Eren says as he looks over to Armin who had just handle out some tickets to some customers. "Mikasa got to manage the hunted house, why couldn't we be with her?"
"Because if you hadn't taken up so long to finish the science test, we could have gotten to the billboard and signed for a better boot," Armin replied with a little bit of sarcasm.
"It's not my fault that Ms. Hange is making her test more difficult!" Eren replied.
"They are not difficult, it's you that you don't study-"
"Hi! Can we have two entrance tickets-" you stopped mid-sentence as you recognized the two boys selling the tickets. They were two of your students. "Eren, Armin! What are you two doing here?"
"Ms.y/l! It's nice to see you here, we are volunteering!" Eren smiles at you, you were one of his favorite teachers, if not the favorite.
"Ah, college applications, right?"
"Yeah, they can be a pain in the butt,"
"Eren! Show some respect," Armin says as he elbows his best friend, Armin looks back at you and smile. "Sorry for that Ms. y/l."
"Don't worry, as long as we are off school ground it should be fine," you smiled back at them. They were an inseparable duo, well trio but Mikasa wasn't here at the moment.
"Well, let me get you two tickets for you and-" Armin expected to see someone else, someone he didn't know. Maybe a boyfriend or a husband but instead it was the janitor. "For you and ... Mr. Ackerman."
"Ah, yes, Mr. Ackerman is my date for the night-"
"What about Mr. Smith-"
Eren stopped mid-sentence as he felt Armin's strong gaze on him. The blond boy had told Eren about the accident a few days ago in the library. Armin had you and Erwin in a rather compromising situation and although nothing had happened, to the eyes of the blond boy, it wasn't' like that.
"Mr. Smith left us homework! I forgot to do it!" Eren quickly came up with an excuse and although Levi was listening to everything, he was still a bit suspicious about the boy's sudden change of attitude.
You also decided to let it go, you were too excited and wanted to eat as much sugar as your heart pleases. You didn't want to admit it but although this wasn't actually a date, it was nice to spend this time with someone.
"Don't worry, I'll help you finish it!" Armin says as he hands out the two tickets. "Have fun Ms. y/l and Mr. Ackerman!"
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This wasn't Levi's favorite place, actually, it was all the contrary. For a moment he felt like just disappearing on you. But the moment he took a look at your face, your eyes that shone beautifully, your smile, and how excited you look, he knew that he just couldn't leave.
If his company, as gloomy as it was, made you happy then he can survive the night.
If he was being completely honest, he doesn't' have the fondest of memories. Levi remembers coming to a carnival once with his mother before she passed away. He had a routine to come whenever it opened, just as a way to honor his mother.
But in his freshman year of high school, kids would just be cruel. One of Levi's bullies locked him inside a darkroom in the haunted house and it took for the carnival to close for someone to be able to find him.
He was there for two days, in the dark. Maybe that's why he is scared of the dark and of small spaces.
Levi learned one important thing that day ... That absolutely no one cared about him.
"So, what do you want to do first?" You ask as you smiled at the short man. "We ride a roller coaster, or go to the house of mirrors! Oh, I also want to go to the ferry wheel!"
However, Levi seemed to not be paying attention at all. He was looking away at another carnival stand. An arm wrestle contest was happening and there were a lot of people around.
"Come joins now! Whoever gets to beat our champion, big James, gets to take home this antique teacup evaluated over more than a thousand dollars!"
"Oh, this should be interesting."
You grab Levi by the hand, almost dragging him to the stand. "Let's participate and win that teacup!"
"Are you crazy? There's no way we are going to win against that guy," Levi takes a quick look at the man sitting on a table. He was buff, very strong and Levi was sure that if he wanted, he could break someone's bone. "Let's just go somewhere else-"
"I'll participate!" you say out loud as the presenter and the crowd looks at you. Funny faces and weird looks, no one believed in you and even Levi was a bit embarrassed about the whole situation. Why even participate when there was no way, you would win?
"Well, we have a brave young lady!" the presenter says as he lets out a small laugh. "Very well, if you win, you will take this teacup with you."
You sat at the table where 'Big James' sat in front of you. He also had a mocking face. "Don't worry little girl, I'll make this quick for you, the humiliation won't be for long."
"I say the same thing to you," you smiled as you grabbed his strong hand. You stared at him in the eyes, confident about your strength. "I'll try not to hurt you too much."
"You have guts, I'll give you that!"
"Alright, in one ... two ... three and," the presenter takes a pause. "Go!"
Everyone expected this to be over quickly but everyone was surprised the moment that Big James tried to move his hand and he couldn't. His hand trembles against yours and you only looked at him with a smile.
"You can use both of your hands if you want, I don't mind," you say as James tried with all of his force to make your hand bend, but nothing was happening and you weren't even sweating. "Well, let's make this fast."
And with one movement, big Jame's hand landed on the table, breaking it. You had used a great force as the big guy ended up on the ground. And if everything was quiet before, now it was completely silent.
Even Levi was in shock, he remembers you telling him that you were strong. But he never imagined for you to be this strong.
You walked over to the presenter who had his mouth open and very fast you took the beautiful teacup out of his hands and walked away from him.
Walking back towards Levi, you were a bit pleased that you had left him speechless.
"Here, for you darling," you say as you hand out Levi the teacup and he delicately accepted it. "Let's get some funnel cakes now!"
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"And the way you flipped him over and broke the table was incredible!" Levi rambles. "Everyone was left speechless!"
Now you two were on the ferries wheel, the night about to end. It was an enjoyable night, even for Levi. After getting in multiple rides and eating like crazy, he had to admit that this was the most fun he has ever had.
Especially since he got a teacup.
"What matters is that I got you that teacup!" you say as you enjoyed the soft movement of the ferries wheel going up. "You seem to have a like for teacups and tea ... Last time I was at your apartment, that's what I noticed the most."
"She noticed?"
"You should start a teacup collection!" you say. "That' should take your mind off things from time to time."
"...Maybe," Levi says as he looks down at the white teacup in his hands. He held it delicately, it was simple, yet beautiful. The white porcelain was beautiful, Levi had never seen anything like it. As he inspected the teacup more and more he found out that there were golden letters engraved on the cup's handle.
"To Levi, enjoy every day as if it was your one last time."
You were busy looking outside the window and enjoying the scenery. But the moment you noticed that Levi was too quiet, you decided to turn around and check on him.
Sitting next to you, Levi Ackerman was crying.
Completely in tears.
"Levi, are you alright? What's wrong?" You began to panic as you didn't know what had triggered him to cry to this extent.
"I am fine ... it's just that this teacup," Levi tried his best to contain his tears. But his heartfelt was filled with emotions he couldn't describe. "I feel like someone has already given me this cup before."
Levi knew that it didn't make sense, that nothing was making sense at all. But his heart feels like breaking and also as it had finally found the thing he was looking for so long.
"I've been looking for this for so long, on so many occasions before ...I miss her so much," and this time, it was wasn't Levi talking. His mind just spoke whatever it desired and his heart dictated each word. "I miss her so much, she must be worried about me, I need to find her!"
And as more tears came out, Levi held onto the cup dearly as if his whole life depended on it, as if his sole reason for living was to protect the teacup in his hands.
You got closer to him and you tried to make sense of the sentences he was saying.
"She's out there ... waiting for me, Maria is waiting for me."
"Maria? Who is he talking about?" you thought.
Levi's voice breaks and although he didn't know why he was even crying, he wasn't scared. He could almost picture the person he was craving to look for. Pretty dresses and beautiful long hair, a face he couldn't see, beautiful laughter, and the smell of lavender.
All of this time, Levi never really had a reason to live.
But at this moment, at this time, as he held in his hands the gift his past lover gave him ... He couldn't think about dying. Death can go to hell for now.
Death can wait until the moment Levi meets her again
"Thank you ... I finally have something to remember her ... thank you, thank you so much."
As the cart on the ferries wheel gets to the top, Levi embraces you. His body against yours, you could feel the heat radiating off his body. His natural smell filled your nostrils, almost too intoxicating.
It was as if someone else had overtaken Levi's body and although you were a bit scared of his sudden mood change, you didn't mind.
It felt nice to have him like this. His arms around you as if life depended on it as if time had stopped. As if the entire world had stopped working just so the two of you could share this moment.
And as Levi separated from you, your eyes met his. Dark, ocean blue eyes. You had seen many beautiful things before, beautiful sceneries, beautiful paintings.
But as your face began to get closer to his, as your eyes got lost in the depths of his blue eyes ... You knew that no panting, no sculpture, no natural creation could ever compare to Levi's blue eyes.
And for a moment, for the smallest of a fraction.
It wasn't Levi there with you anymore.
And although you never saw his face, although you only dreamt of him once. You just knew that the man in front of you ...
was the same man you saw in your dreams all of those years ago.
And unintentionally, without any control of each other's bodies, the two past lovers knew what was going to happen.
After so many decades of being apart ... after 200 years ...
The lost lovers share a kiss.
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A/N: Not me crying after writing the last scene.
I can just imagine Levi's past lives trying to look for Maria and never being able to find her until this time period and the thought makes me sad.
Also, Levi being reunited with the teacup Maria gave him makes me cry my eyes out. (Because we know what happens to that teacup)
So, if you haven't noticed, this has a lot of parallels to my main story One Last Time.
I think that people who have read that story will definitely find this fanfiction more impactful and way more emotional.
As I've said before, this story is a DRAFT story that I am giving the people who enjoy Levi x Reader stories. In this one, you are playing the role of 'Maria' my OC, and Levi's past lover.
You can say that you are kinda like the 'reincarnation' of her. Or maybe not, I am still debating on that.
I feel like this story will never be able to reach its full potential because a part of me doesn't like Levi x Reader stories. If I was fully invested in this story, I would write 10k word chapters every week just like I did with One Last Time lol.
Hopefully, after I finish writing this story, I can like Levi x Reader stories but for now, I can't find myself doing so.
Anyway, I am not saying this to promote my Levi x OC story, but I wholeheartedly recommend you to read One Last Time (Which it's finished and you can find in my profile) if you want to fully enjoy this story.
There are going to be a lot of references from that story and to understand Levi's feelings, later on, it's better if you read it lol.
I want to thank the people who have ready this story haha, honestly I wasn't expecting any kind of support at all because this is a draft story. There are so many mistakes already but right now I am just writing this for the sake of it and that's kind of fun.
Somehow I feel like this story will be more popular than my OC story one, probably because this is a Levi X Reader and people prefer them over OCs. Honestly, if it does, I'll be disappointed because this is trash compare to One Last Time haha.
But I am always thankful for all the support, kudos, and lovely comments. They always inspired me to keep writing and although these chapters are shorter, I do enjoy writing them, and writing about Levi its always fun!
Anyways, thank you so much, and see you all next week.