Worthless (Matt Espinosa Fanf...

By mostlymatt

229K 4.8K 1.6K

'I've fallen in love with a girl who's broken. I plan to fix her' More

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
Chapter 47
Chapter 48
Chapter 49
Chapter 50
Chapter 51
Chapter 52
Chapter 53
Chapter 54
10k READS?!
Chapter 55
Chapter 56
I MET MATT
Chapter 57
Chapter 58
This is me
Chapter 59
Chapter 60
Chapter 61
Chapter 62

Chapter 28

3.5K 71 45
By mostlymatt

"don't leave me!" I yelled.

Everything was a blur. I was sitting in the hospital. I was crying and had my head in my hands.

What am I going to do? If she leaves me it will never be the same.

These thoughts never left my mind. I cried and cried. This is awful.

She's not going to leave me, but in that moment she left.

I woke up crying.

I had a nightmare.

The night of when I lost Laura. Every single detail that happened that night was in my dream.

I hate life.

I just want to be gone. No not just because Avery, but also because I just don't have the desire to be here.

I'm sick and tired of people treating me like im nothing. Oh you think being famous at school is great?

Girls drooling over you, guys wanting to hang out just to say they know me, getting treated special.

It's not always that great.

Yes I'm grateful for my fans and family and friends, but I just I don't know.

"You're up.." A frail voice trailed off.

I turned around to see Avery beside me.

"Avery" I said then looked around.

I was in an actual hospital room just like the one in my dream.

Why was I here? How could I not notice.

I looked at Avery.

"Why am I here?" I whispered.

A tear fell down her face and I turned to my side so I was laying in front of her. I took my thumb and wiped the tear away.

She closed her eyes and a small grin grew on her face. Her expression completely changed when she was about to speak.

"You tried to commit suicide Matthew" her soft voice said.

She began to tear up.

"Promise me that if I don't leave you, you won't leave me" she said while holding up her pinky.

I raised mine up to hers and locked them together.

"I promise Avery" I smiled.

She nodded with satisfaction. She looked at me in the eyes and she began to smile. I looked into her eyes then looked at her lips.

"kiss me already" she whispered.

I leaned in and kissed her. It felt so right.

It's the feeling I missed so much. It was passionate and sweet. I pulled away and looked at her.

"This isn't where or how I was planning to tell you, but I miss you Matt and I'm sorry for what I did. I love you." She said.

Happiness. This is my cure.

Avery's POV

I ran to my room. I couldn't handle being without Matt being there. This is awful.

Life without Matthew by my side is hard.

I miss him.

I began to cry.

I don't know why I just need Matt. I decided I should go knock on his door to see if we could talk. I wanted to give him a second chance.

I knocked on his door, but there was no answer. I put my ear against the door and tried to hear something.

I heard crying.

Matthew crying.

I freaked out and ran down stairs instead of taking the elevator which wasn't the best decision I would say.

I stopped at the tenth floor and ran down the hall to the elevator.

I waited for it to open, but it seemed like forever. It finally dinged and I ran inside. I pressed the lobby button and went down.

I ran into the lobby looking for the guys. I found them all sitting down in the lobby, a few meeting fans, and drinking Starbucks. I ran to Carter and almost yelled at him to give me his key.

"Why?" He asked confused.

"Because I said so now give it" I demanded.

Some of the fans gave me dirty looks and I just rolled my eyes. They don't know what's going on and if they did they would feel the same as me. He saw the worry in my eyes and handed me the key, but got up.

"It's matt" I whispered.

He nodded and we both ran to the elevator. We finally arrived at our floor and ran down to their room. Carter struggled getting the door open, but we finally got it.

I ran into the room searching for Matt looking everywhere.

"Avery..." Carters voice was quiet and seemed like he was shocked.

"Yeah?" I asked running where he was standing in front of the bathroom door.

There lay Matt on the floor. His hair and shorts he had on were wet. There were pills scattered everywhere.

I broke down.

"Call 911!" I yelled at Carter as I ran towards Matt. "Matthew" I cried.

I sat there looking at him. Was I the cause of this? What if he doesn't make it.

If He doesn't make it, I won't make it.

I shook him and called out his name. Tears ran down my cheeks and I was torn.

"Thank you" I heard Carter say.

He came into the bathroom and put his arm around me. I cried and I couldn't stop. I'm going to loose him.

"Sh ah it's okay" Carter said rapping his arm around me tighter.

We heard beating at the door and Carter and I both stood up. He ran to the door and the medical people came in. They got Matt and took him down to the Ambulance.

We went down with them and I held on to Matt's hand the whole time. They put him in and we ran back to lobby. The guys stood there and some fans were freaking out.

"Guys lets go now!" I yelled as we all ran towards the cars.

We got in them and different people rode with each driver. I was with Sammy, Jack, and Jack. I cried and Sammy put his arm around me.

"He's going to be okay I promise." He cooed.

"No he's not" I cried harder.

He hugged me tight and didn't let go. I felt something wet the top of my head. I looked up to see Sammy crying. He hugged me even tighter. We got out of the car right when we arrived and ran into the building.

"I need to see Matthew Espinosa now!" I demanded.

"Okay miss hold on" the lady at the desk said.

She directed up to a seating area and I couldn't keep still. Sammy gave me a water to keep me hydrated and by this point we were all crying and worried.

The doctor stepped out and came towards us. I stood up and so did Lucy and the boys.

"Okay Matthew tried to commit suicide as some of you know. He tried to do a drug overdose, but you caught him just in time. We had ran some test on him and we still have to see if there are any other problems." The doctor spoke. "but as for right now it's not visiting time, just family members can see him. Any family members?"

"I'm his girlfriend." I spoke up.

Sammy looked at me and I nodded.

"Very well. Follow me." He said.

I walked with him into a room where Matt lay on a hospital bed. He looked so frail and pale.

I sighed as I looked at him.

"Now he made it and he's very lucky. He's going to need help with his depression issue and it seems he's struggling from the loss of a loved one maybe." The doctor whispered. "but you may stay in here if you like. He should be waking up soon"

I nodded and he left the room. I sat down on his bed and looked at him. I'm so lucky he didn't go. I looked at him wishing none of this would've ever happened. This is all my fault.

I laid down beside Matt and rapped my arms around him not caring if I was supposed too. I waited a long time just thinking. A loss of a loved one? Who could that be. I decided to let Matt tell me instead of me asking.

I felt him shift over a little. I waited till I knew he was awake.

"You're up.." I said.

Matt looked around and saw me.

"Avery" he said.

He turned to lay down beside me. I felt as if I was going to cry.

"Why am I here?" He asked.

A tear slipped from my eyes. He took his thumb and wiped it.

"You tried to commit suicide Matthew." I said.

He looked at me with hurt in his eyes.

"Promise me that if I don't leave you, you wont leave me." I said holding up my pinky finger.

"I promise Avery" he smiled.

He locked his pinky into mine and I let go. He looked at me in the eyes and I looked at him. He kept looking at my lips and I knew what he wanted.

"Kiss me already" I whispered.

He smiled and leaned in. He kissed me passionately and it was the feeling I missed so much. I pulled away and looked at him.

"This isn't where or how I was planning to tell you, but I miss you Matt. I love you" I said as he grabbed my hand. "I'm going to give you another chance"

He smiled at my words.

"I love you so much. I'm sorry. What I did was horrible. I want to say thank you for not leaving my side." He said

He kissed me again and looked at me.

"I'm lucky" he said

"I know" I started "you could have-"

"To have such a strong person in my life. Thank you for staying by me even though I put you through all of this. I'm a terrible person and I'm sorry. I made you go through this" he spoke softly.

"I did it because I need you. Thank you Matthew" I smiled.

He laughed and turned on his back. He grabbed my hands.

"Let's get out of here" he said while sitting up.

"'Matthew Lee lay back down now" I demanded.

"Feisty" he laughed while wiggling his eyebrows.

He laid beside me and smiled.

He kissed my nose.

I really missed this.

__________________________

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