One night. Just one night did Katsuki fall asleep peacefully and that was on the twenty second of December when Izuku had given him the teddy bear.
It's been four months and within those four months Katsuki didn't try to make a single effort if anything it got worse. His grades had fallen from being a A+ student to becoming a C- or on occasion a D student. His training on the other hand got way more aggressive destroying his hands, his knuckles would be covered with blood by training off school campus, he would dunk his hands in hot water and make the biggest explosions he could possibly do and even then he wasn't satisfied. As for his eating habits he no longer ate with his classmates he ate by himself in his room. Some days he wouldn't even eat at all however occasionally on those days he would eat one apple and drink one water bottle, but other than that nothing.
It was now April and it was Katsuki's birthday. Izuku remembered Katsuki's birthday since he marked it on his All Might themed calendar. That morning he got dressed for school and headed downstairs to be meet with all his classmates minus Katsuki which in his opinion was great.
"Hey guys it's Bakugo's birthday today. Let's throw him a party. What do you say?" Everyone looked at each other and Mina spoke. "I think Bakugo might go home and spend his birthday with his family. So it probably won't give us enough time to spend it with him."
"I guess you are right, but we can still try don't you guys care about him?" Izuku said as he grabbed an apple to eat as his breakfast. "Look Midoriya it's not like we don't want to throw him a party I just think it won't be a great idea if he is going home and spending it with his family." Kirishima said. "If you say so." With that Midoriya left and headed to school.
***
As Izuku sat in his chair he put his full focus on the ash blonde hair that was in front of him. Izuku thought of what Katsuki liked, but really couldn't come up with anything since he didn't know him at all.
Kinda sucks that our classmates don't want to do anything for him. Well it doesn't matter because I will end up doing something for him. I will go to the grocery store after school and buy some ingredients to make him a small meal and buy him a cupcake. Yeah that would be great! But I don't know his favorite food. Oh well I will just make katsudon it's the only thing I know how to make that comes out great. Yeah I will do that! Izuku thought to himself.
***
Once school was over Izuku shoved all his belongings into his backpack and ran out the door heading to the grocery store.
When Izuku arrived to the store he grabbed a cart and walked through the aisles of the grocery store grabbing the ingredients to make the katsudon. He stopped in front of the pastry place he looked thought the selection of cupcakes and found a All Might theme cupcake and grabbed it. "This is gonna be great!"
***
While Izuku was planning on surprising Katsuki, Katsuki sat in his dorm room his lights off and his curtains blocking the afternoon sunlight. Katsuki sat in the dark completely shattered.
"Why can't I feel anything?" Katsuki said out loud. Without realizing tears ran down his face as all he could hear were the same voices and the thoughts that crossed his mind.
Katsuki started laughing quietly so no one would come in. Katsuki was suffering and yet nobody dared helped him. They all thought he just isolated himself, which was true, but nobody could truly see the pain that was overwhelming him.
Katsuki was screaming for help in a way nobody noticed. He wanted someone to be there for him. To make the monsters that were in his mind die. To shut them up. Yet no one saw. No one dared to try.
"No one comes. And no one will ever come." He said through the tears that fell.
***
Izuku, who was almost finishing the katsudon he was making to surprise his classmate, had grabbed a tray and two plates a small one and a big one. He pulled out the All Might theme cupcake he had bought and placed it on the small plate while he severed the katsudon that was now done on the big one. He also grabbed a water bottle as well as a soda and placed them on the tray.
Midoriya was happy to see that all his hard work had a perfect outcome. He removed the apron he was wearing washed his hands and grabbed the tray. As he walked through the living room heading upstairs Kirishima had noticed him.
"Hey Midoriya where are you going with that tray?" He asked. Midoriya stopped in his tracks and looked at Kirishima. "I made Bakugo a small birthday meal since you guys didn't want to throw him a party."
Everyone looked at Kirishima for him to do something so that Izuku wouldn't go upstairs. "Well how about I go give it to him. I mean what if he is taking a nap and you end up waking him up and he hits you. Nobody would want to see you get hurt. So just give me the tray and I will go." Izuku stuck out his tongue like a small child. "No. You just want all the credit for my hard work. I'm leaving now before the food I made gets cold. Bye." With that Izuku left the common area.
As he left the whole class looked at each other worried for what may end up happening. Iida being the class rep took lead. "Look guys everything will be fine. Have faith in Midoriya." Momo butt in as well. "Yeah Midoriya can take care of himself."
***
As Izuku got off the elevator and headed towards his destination he could just imagine a small smile on Bakugo's face.
When he stood in front of Bakugo's door he knocked twice, but there was no answer. Starting to feel slightly sad when Bakugo didn't answer he decided to try and open the door hoping it was unlocked.
When Izuku turned the door knob and it opened the sadness he felt quickly left. However as he opened the door and stepped into the room all his hard work went down the drain when he dropped the tray at what he saw.
Bakugo's room was a mess. His desk filled with papers, books stacked up, pens pencils and highlighters scattered all throughout the desk. Bakugo's laundry hamper filled with dirty clothes and a small trash bin filled with crumbled up papers along with bags of chips and empty water bottles.
This filled Izuku with sadness, but when his emerald green eyes landed on the ash blonde that was when his heart had broke. To see Bakugo, one of his classmates, suffering with so much pain hurt him.
Izuku closed the bed room door and slowly walked up to Katsuki and sat down next to him. When Izuku was close to him the atmosphere that surrounded Katsuki hit Izuku like a bus. He could feel the pain the suffering that surrounded Katsuki. It overwhelmed Izuku so much that he felt as if he was drowning in extremely cold water unable to breath.
"What's wrong? What happened?" Izuku asked but got no reply. Izuku looked at Katsuki's eyes even though his eyes were red not a single ounce of red was visible all he could see was grey, a deep dark shade of grey.
Izuku grabbed both of Katsuki's hands and this caused Katsuki to react. This small action caused Katsuki to come back to reality the reality he was trying to leave to escape.
Katsuki looked at Izuku he thought that Izuku had been a very realistic imagination that his brain had created for him.
"Why?" Katsuki subconsciously said. Katsuki said that simple question not as an actual answer to Izuku, but more like he was thinking out loud and not in his head.
Due to this Izuku didn't know how to answer Katsuki. He was confused and yet instead of saying, 'What do you mean by, why?' Izuku stayed silent guessing that deep down Katsuki was going to say more.
"Why? Why are you here? Why is it always you?" Katsuki spoke once more. Izuku could easily tell that Katsuki was thinking out loud that Katsuki was speaking without him knowing so.
Silence.
Silence filled the room as neither one of them spoke. That silence had felt like days had gone by, but in reality it was only for a few minutes.
Soon Katsuki had averted his eyes from Izuku's and Katsuki looked down. Izuku had taken note of Katsuki's action and looked down wondering if something was on his shirt or if it was for a completely different reason.
Katsuki slipped his right hand from Izuku's left hand and picked Izuku's head up. Katsuki's forefinger and thumb holding Izuku's head up by his chin. Izuku was startled by Katsuki's sudden action, but when Izuku had noticed that Katsuki's eyes weren't locked with his he had come to the realization as he now knew what Katsuki was staring at.
His lips.
Izuku now knowing this had felt panic slowly start to rise within his chest slowly spreading all throughout his body. His heartbeat increasing by the millisecond.
Is he going to kiss me?! I mean in every romantic movie, book and some manga this type or very similar situation ends up happening. Izuku thought.
Izuku's heart was now pounding against his chest. His breathing slowly, very slowly, starting to become uneven. Izuku wanted to turn his head to the side, but was unable to since Katsuki had a hold of him.
The atmosphere within the room now felt heavy and Izuku was starting to feel very very overwhelmed with it. This overwhelming feeling had increased when he had heard Katsuki speak once again, "I want you."
Izuku couldn't believe the sentence, three simple words, that came out of Katsuki's mouth. "W-wah? ... y-you ... you w-want me?!" Izuku stuttered out.
Katsuki ran his thumb across Izuku's soft lips. The lips Katsuki yearned for not only for a kiss, but for the words and laughs that would come out of them. But what Katsuki mostly yearned for was one word. One word that made him go crazy in ways he himself couldn't explain. The name Izuku had made for him, the name that only Izuku was able to say.
"I want you to torment me the only way you can do." Katsuki said as he once again ran his thumb across Izuku's lips.
"T-torment? ... H-how?" Izuku stuttered once more. Izuku's brain couldn't take anything anymore. All Izuku felt was pure and utter nervousness and panic. He didn't understand what Katsuki meant.
"I want you to torment me with your words. I want you to torment me with your laughs and giggles. With your smiles. With the way you look at me. Torment me with your actions. Torment me with your lips against mine." Katsuki paused for a second and that simple second caused fear to rise within Izuku. "But most importantly, I want you to torment me with one simple word, with my name." Katsuki finally finished.
That last sentence caused Izuku to give Katsuki a questionable look. Izuku didn't know what Katsuki meant by, 'I want you to torment me with one simple word, with my name.'
Katsuki read Izuku like an open book and so he had answered Izuku's question. "Kacchan. I want you to say Kacchan."
When Izuku heard Katsuki say 'Kacchan.' He wanted to burst out in a fit of giggles. The nickname sounded funny, but very cute at the same time. However for some reason those giggles never left his lips.
Izuku had felt Katsuki's thumb once again run against his lips and this time it had felt different, different in a good way.
"Say it." Katsuki said as he kept his full attention on Izuku's lips. Hoping Izuku would said the name he hated and loved at the same time.
For a few seconds Izuku thought about the consequences that could easily lead up to if he ended up saying, 'Kacchan.' and those consequences scared him. And before he knew it he had felt Katsuki's lips against his own.
At that moment he had come to realize that he had said, "Kacchan." subconsciously.
Izuku had come back to reality when he had felt Katsuki's arms wrapped around him and Katsuki had deepened the kiss.
The kiss wasn't rough instead it was gentle. So gentle that Izuku could easily think it was a dream.
Instead of pushing Katsuki away like he knew he needed too. He didn't dare do anything. Deep within Izuku a feeling had ran through his body. A feeling that felt completely good in every way. He couldn't put his finger on the feeling, but when Katsuki pulled him closer to his chest and his hold on him tighten he knew what that feeling was.
Safety.
That was it. Izuku had felt absolutely safe within Katsuki's hold. He had felt a pure, safe and comforting warmth cover his body.
As if Izuku's body had a mind of its own, his arms wrapped around Katsuki and was now kissing Katsuki back with such a gentle yet deep kiss.
To Izuku, this kiss, had felt weirdly familiar. As if he somehow had kissed someone just like this before.
Both of them pulled away to breath their foreheads against one an other as they both were still in each other's arms.
Finally the voices and thoughts within Katsuki had died. All he could feel at the moment was peacefulness. He had felt as if he was whole again.
"Stay with me tonight." Katsuki said. He wouldn't be able to bare of thinking of what had happened was just an illusion or a dream. Katsuki needed Izuku near him because he knew that if it was just an illusion or dream he would break again and the voices and thoughts would come back to haunt him.
Izuku didn't dare think twice about his answer to Katsuki's request. Izuku had never felt such safety with one person that alone made him say the right answer. "Yes."
When Katsuki had heard that simple word come from Izuku's mouth he had come to a realization that what had happened was all real, that it wasn't an illusion or a dream.
Katsuki pulled Izuku onto his lap and once Izuku was on his lap he dropped his head in the crook of Izuku's neck and he had finally felt as if he had come back home from a very stressful day. He buried his head deeper into Izuku's neck and had tightened his hold on Izuku.
Katsuki was home. Sure he wasn't with the Izuku he wanted back, but he was with the Izuku that had killed the voices and the horrifying thoughts that haunted him day and night. He was safe and sound in the place were he belonged with the person he yearned for.
Katsuki was in the arms of the one he loves.
***
Hope you liked it! 🧡💚