EPILOGUE 3
Xydon Zeus S. Montevinski
"Congratulations, Engineer Montevinski!"
Kinamayan ako ng direktor ng may-ari ng tower. He's a singaporean businessman, and known as a powerful billionaire. Inayos ko ang aking coat matapos ang kamayan at humakbang ng isang beses paatras.
"Thank you for trusting my team, Mr. Chua. Congratulations on your new branch here in Singapore."
It's not my first tower project. I already had a lot of finished projects internationally. Ito ang huli munang malaking proyekto ko dahil kailangan ko nang ilaan ang oras ko sa M Prime.
Mr. Chua excused himself. I remained standing in front of my latest project, a 910ft tower. My team was happy behind me. Ako ay nakatayo lamang habang nakapamulsa. I'm happy with this big achievement, but something is missing.
Kung tutuusin, marami na akong proyektong nagawa pero hindi ko pa nasubukan na maging masaya nang matagal. My happiness for my finished projects are all fleeting, mabilis din na maglaho.
Maybe we can't really be happy with our success when we feel that something is really missing. The moment I lost Uoiea, I never felt a long-lived happiness since then. Kung naging masaya man ako ay hindi rin nagtatagal. It's like... my happiness was robbed from me.
Maybe all of my successes will make me happy if I already have her in my arms again. Pero, kailan kaya ulit?
I had a lot of dreams. To build high towers around the world. To give everything to Uoiea with all that I have. To make her proud of me, and to see her joy whenever I accomplish something this big. Pero hindi lahat natupad dahil sa sarili kong katangahan. Even my main dream I failed to secure. I lost her...
I was scared to lose her, and I thought that the decisions I chose would really help me to keep her, but I was wrong. Mas lalo ko siyang nasaktan, mas lalo lang siyang nawala sa akin. My lies, my cowardice, and myself are to be blamed. And I don't know when I could forgive myself after that extreme fallacy.
If only I had the courage to tell her everything, I know we won't end up like that. If only I was brave to listen to her explanations, I know she wouldn't feel greatly impaired. It was my entire fault. All she did was understand me, and support me... And I failed to return the things she did for me.
She trusted me. Ilang beses na akong nagtago sa kan'ya, pero lagi niya pa ring hinihintay ang eksplenasyon ko. She's always willing to listen to me, and wait for my words. Pero siya, unang beses pa lang, hindi ko na napakinggan.Tinalikuran ko kaagad siya. I was really self-centered back then... All I thought was my past and pain. I was a fucking asshole.
All I've wanted was the best for her, but everything turned out otherwise.
When she slipped in my arms, I didn't know what to do next. I was stuck in the middle of nowhere. Hindi alam ang gagawin, hindi sigurado kung magpapatuloy pa ba... She's my treasure. She's like a sun to me. She gives me energy to keep on living, and now that she's gone, I really didn't know how I could cope with the pain.
I was miserable. I know she was, too. I know she loved me as much as she could, kaya alam ko na nasaktan din siya nang sobra. Hindi lang ako...
But I know it's not yet too late. I said to myself, if I lost her because of who I was before, then maybe I really should change so I wouldn't lose her anymore once she's back to me. Mahirap makakuha ng tsansa, pero sisikapin ko...
"Why do you want his company down?" Zoren asked.
Naka-uwi na ako ng Pilipinas. I'm busy with the M Prime, but when I saw Vier's downgrading company, I momentarily got a plan in my head.
"I want him down," sabi ko habang nilalaro ang aking swivel chair.
He smirked. "I'm in," malamig nitong sabi.
I will never forget how she used my girl. How Uoiea became the talk of the town because of him. I'd never forget about it. I'm already done with the Salvadors, siya naman ang sunod ko...
"Mooze will surely help you with this," mas lalong lumawak ang ngisi niya. "I need to go now. I'm a busy man."
At ako, hindi? Siya ang pumunta rito matapos matunugan na may plano ako sa kompanya ni Vier. He's in favor of my plan. His girl is under that company...
Pumarada ang sasakyan ko sa harap ng medical school ni Uoiea. I waited there until she went out with her friends. Every time my eyes land on her, I always have this feeling that something heavy is always bugging her. She's not the Uoiea I met before... She barely smiles, laughs and talks now. And I know... I was part of her change.
I saw how Jasro's arm covered her shoulders. Humigpit ang hawak ko sa manibela, pero wala naman akong magawa. Umiling lang si Uoiea sa kung anong sinabi ng lalaki. I calmed down a bit upon seeing that Uoiea wasn't affected. Kaibigan lang sila... And I failed to comprehend that years ago.
I always watch updates about Uoiea. Madalas kasi itong nahahagip sa mga videos. Sometimes they do Tiktok videos as well, pero hindi gaanong nakikisali si Uoiea. She always looks... sad. And one time, there was this content of Jaya. If I could still remember it right, truth or dare and challenge. There were questions about Uoiea and Jasro. Jasro liked my girl, and I knew she didn't like him back. Sigurado na ako roon... Sana noon ko pa napagtanto.
Pero 'pagdating ng panahon at mahulog siya sa kaibigan niya, siguro ayos na 'yon sa akin. She's been through a lot in my care, and for her to find genuine happiness in someone else... It'll really be a big deal to me. Magiging masaya na lang din ako para sa kan'ya. Mamahalin ko na lang siya mula sa malayo... Ayos na siguro ako roon.
I won't step into her life knowing she's really serious about achieving her dreams. Siguro kung maayos na ang lahat, kung doctor na siya... siguro ay pwede na akong sumubok ulit. For now, I'm content with staring and stalking her from afar. Just like before...
We're back to zero.
Ganito naman kami nagsimula... Kaso mas mahirap talaga ngayon dahil may bakas na ng sakit ang nakaraan namin.
I've become very busy with M Prime. Ang lupa na pinuntahan namin noon ni Uoiea ay unti-unti nang napupuno ng mga buildings... It looks different now compared to before. At sa tuwing nakikita ko ang malaking pagbabago, I can't help but feel a throbbing in my heart.
We were supposed to be getting our dreams together. Masaya sana kami sa achievements ng bawat isa... Masaya sana ako sa lahat ng mga proyekto ko kung nasa tabi ko siya bawat hakbang ko sa tagumpay.
Gano'n din kaya ang naiisip niya? But I think she doesn't like me anymore. She doesn't love me anymore, kaya wala na siyang pakialam. Hindi niya na ako iniisip... But it's not unfair. It was my choice to keep on loving her. It's not her responsibility to give it back.
Mooze's ex girlfriend acquired a lot in M Prime. Nang nalaman ni Mooze, grabe ang pangingialam niya kahit sa mga meeting naming dalawa.
"This is an exclusive meeting, Mr. Zeus Montevinski," striktong sabi ng kan'yang ex na mukhang irritado.
My lips rose. I know this is an exclusive meeting because we're gonna talk about the plan for her mansion inside my estate. Pero wala naman akong magawa sa pinsan ko...
"Mooze knows a lot of things, Miss."
Wala akong ibang masabi. Clearly, Mooze doesn't know anything about my field. He's managing hotels and resorts, not building structures, etc. Kaya lang naman siya nakikisawsaw ay dahil sa ex n'yang hapon.
Madalas mangialam si Mooze sa aming meeting. His ex-girlfriend is already a friend of our family. In fact, I'm in partnership with her tech company headquartered in Tokyo, Japan. M Prime's houses are modern and techy, and her company is the top provider of good services and products. That's why some of my mansion projects are really advanced because of her influence.
My residential estate became known in the industry. High profile people chose to reside in my company because of the quality and security my place gives them. The triplets are also helping me so everything is easier.
Pinarada ko ang itim kong sports car sa basement ng M condominium. Pagpasok ko sa condo ni Zoren, marami nang tao. Sinalubong ako ni Rhione. Maingay na sila dahil kanina pa nga nagsimula. May meeting akong dinaluhan kaya nahuli...
Sa condo muna ang celebration dahil ongoing ang construction ng mansion nila sa M Prime. I'm really busy with their mansions, while I don't know when I am going to build our own. Saka na. Hindi pa naman mahalaga 'yon sa akin. Walang saysay 'yon kung wala siya...
"Nagsisimula ulit 'yon. Vier Escovar?" ang kaibigan ni Zoren, boyfriend yata ng kaibigan ni Uoiea. I can't remember fully...
I'm seriously listening. Napatingin pa sa akin ang ilang pinsan ko dahil sa pangalan na nabanggit.
"He was my boss. Mabait naman..." kunot noong pahayag ni Kesian. "Pero siyempre, mas mabait ang boss ko ngayon."
The crowd laughed because Zoren is her new boss. Hindi lang ako makasabay dahil bothered sa pangalan na 'yon.
"Hindi 'yon mabait, Kelly. He had an assault case years ago. Kaibigan nina Demi, nina Weya..." napatingin siya sa akin.
Kumunot ang noo ko. Suddenly, my heart raced while waiting for the continuation.
"Assault?" tanong ni Madz.
Tumango si Daryl. "It was Jasro. He assaulted Jasro so Weya will come and see him. Buti na lang humingi sila ng tulong sa amin kaya hindi na lumala," at saka ito uminom ng shot niya.
I don't know about it. Hindi ko alam kung kailan kaya naguguluhan ako. May umiikot na na ideya sa utak ko pero hindi ko mapatunayan...
"The night you went home..."
Sinundan ako ni Rhione sa kusina. Nakahawak ang dalawang kamay ko sa sink habang may malalim na iniisip.
"What about it?"
"The night you went home. Doon nangyari ang assault. He helped Jasro... iyong childhood friend niya."
When I saw her with him, it was the night it happened? Gano'n ba 'yon? So, she was just helping him? She was just there as a friend? Mas lalong dumiin ang hawak ko sa sink.
"How did you know?" malamig ang boses ko, hindi siya nililingon.
I could already hear her sobs. "She texted me... She texted me about the assault. Sasama sana siya sa Tagaytay, pero nangyari ang assault kaya---"
"Why didn't you tell me?!" my voice thundered and dominated the place. Natahimik ang mga tao sa living room.
Doon ko siya hinarap. She was crying and I could see guilt in her eyes.
"Because I was mad at her... Nanguna ang galit sa akin dahil akala ko rin ay niloko ka niya," she said with her breaking voice. Dinaluhan siya ni Maddizon at nasa kusina na rin ang mga pinsan namin.
"You could still tell me! You even pushed me to get her back! Hindi ka ba nag-iisip, Rhi?!" nanatili ang tila kulog kong boses dahil sa galit.
"Zeus, tama na! It's been years. O, c'mon, move on!" sigaw ni Maddizon. "Rhione is your sister---"
"She did something wrong, Maddizon! If only she told me... " I groaned. "You just made me feel so fucked up, Rhi! Dapat sinabi mo! Alam mong may problema kami! At dapat kayo ang nandoon, e! What if something happened to her that time?!"
Inaawat na ako ng mga pinsan namin pero umaapaw ang galit ko. It's already in the past, I know, pero posibleng maayos kaagad kung sinabi niya sa akin! Sobrang laki ng naging parte ng ginawa niya sa amin ni Uoiea!
"I didn't see the message quickly..." She was trembling. "And I was mad... Akala ko nagloko talaga siya, pero hindi..."
Nagmura ako at sinipa ang cabinet sa ibaba ng countertop.
"Hayaan mo na siya, Zeus! She's not even affected by the breakup! She's already happy with Jasro!" pangingialam na naman ni Madz.
"Maddizon!" sigaw sa kan'ya ni Zoren.
"Madz, stop, please?" iyak ni Rhione sa nakahawak sa kan'ya na si Maddizon. "She was affected. I was mistaken about her. We all are... She didn't cheat. And I'm sorry, Kuya, dahil natakot akong sabihin sa'yo... I'm really sorry..."
Umalis ako roon. Habang nagmamaneho, tumutulo ang luha ko. I should've listened to her... She's innocent, yet I broke her heart. I couldn't imagine how miserable she was. Nakaparada lang ako malayo sa bahay nila. Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras akong nandoon...
I won't blame her for keeping a long-lasting rage against me. I deserve the wrath, I deserve the pain, I deserve everything. Ngayon rumehistro sa akin kung gaano siya nasira dahil sa akin. I was too toxic and selfish. I love her. I love her so much, pero tang ina, bakit hindi ko siya inisip? Inintindi? Pinakinggan?
I can't stop thinking of how incompetent I was in loving her. Alam ko na mahal na mahal ko siya, pero dumating ako sa punto na kinuwestyon ko kung tama ba ang pagmamahal na 'yon....
Fr: Rhi
Someone will talk to you. I'm really sorry, Zeus...
Hindi ko alam kung sino. Ilang minuto pa ay may pumasok na sa opisina ko. I was curious upon seeing Jasro with his all white uniform. Umayos ako sa aking pagkakaupo nang umupo siya sa harap ng aking lamesa.
"I need to clean Ishi... Weya's name," seryoso niyang anas. "We didn't have a thing. She was faithful to you. Gusto ko siya, pero hindi niya ako gusto noon... Vier used me for Weya. Pumunta siya dahil kaibigan niya ako... at dahil na rin siguro sa nangyari noon."
He was straightforward. Wala na yatang plano pang magtagal dito sa opisina ko. Seryoso ang mga mata, at iritado.
"I saved Weya before... at bilang kaibigan, alam kong ginawa niya 'yon para iligtas din ako. She thinks she owes me her life, that's why she's there. And Vier forced her to go that night because of me... She was just there as a friend. Tumulong siya, Montevinski, pero gano'n na ang ginawa mo..." umiling siya, dismayado at galit.
I was just silent, pero marami nang naglalakbay sa isip ko na mga ideya.
"Stop your cousin from spreading fake news on social media. She didn't cheat... She's affected, Montevinski. Halos araw-araw namin 'yong kasama... Sabihin mo sa pinsan mo, 'wag siyang feeling mas magaling sa amin. We know Weya better than you all know her. 'Yon lang... Sana tumigil na kayo. Busy kami sa internship namin."
Walang lumabas na salita sa aking bibig. Mabagal ang naging paglapat ng balikat ko pabalik sa backrest ng aking swivel. Tumingala ako dahil sa panibagong nalaman. It was all my fault, no doubt. Kasalanan ko talaga ang lahat... Hindi ko tuloy alam kung deserve ko pa ba siya... Kung kailangan ko na ba siyang ipaubaya sa iba... kung saan hindi siya masasaktan gaya noong nasa akin siya.
But I'm changing for her... Sana kung natama ko na ang mga mali sa akin, sana pwede pa.
Hindi na ako bumalik pa sa Dubai. I spent my time enhancing M Prime. Dumami ang mga nag-acquire for lots. Lahat ng mga bumibili ng lupa ay rekta nang gagawan ng bahay. Nasa kanila kung kailan isasagawa ang proseso.
My residential estate became notorious to elite people who are dreaming of a secure and precise quality of property. We're not really into money, we're more into providing the demands of our clients. If people are looking for more economical properties, there are lots around. May mga offers ang mga pinsan ko. They also have estates for middle class people and for low class ones.
The reason we're not allowing people with questionable identities to enter M Prime is to maintain a tough and guaranteed security for our future families. We have talked that Montevinskis and their future families are going to reside in M Prime. I didn't push them with the idea, it came from them.
I couldn't explain how happy I was to hear that my girl topped the board. To be honest, pakiramdam ko ako ang nagpaaral sa kan'ya kahit hindi naman... I'm more proud than ever because she achieved it even without me. I'm so proud, because given all the hardships she has faced, and the past circumstances, she was still able to reach the top. To reach the top without me...
I am beyond happy, but there's still a slight pang in my heart. Hindi ko makakalimutan na ilang beses ko siyang pinangakuan na sa lahat ng matatamo niya ay nasa tabi niya ako. Again, I failed to provide. But my happiness is really dominating. I was really proud of her, I just couldn't act it for her to know. I don't want to destroy her smooth performances.
I'm never gonna ruin her again, and her dreams. Basta narito lang ako...
"Rios, you don't need cash. Bata ka pa..."
Natatawa ako habang nasa sahig kami ng living room nina Rhione. Rios snatched my wallet and he's now busy rummaging my personal things inside.
Lumapit siya sa 'kin. "Who's this? Who's this, Tito Zeus?" excited na tanong niya habang pinapakita sa akin ang wallet size picture ni Uoiea na galing sa aking wallet.
I smiled a bit. "That's mine," sabay hablot ko no'n sa kan'ya dahil baka mapunit pa. Bata pa kasi si Rios...
"Whos' that girl?" pagpupumilit niya habang tinititigan ko ang litrato.
It's Uoiea with her breathtaking laugh. Her mouth was open and her eyes were slightly closed. Anniv namin 'to noon. I surprised her with a large bouquet of roses and a bunch of paper bags with lavish things inside. She deserves all of it so I provided it all...
"Why are you smiling?!" galit na tanong ni Rios.
I chuckled and fixed my wallet.
Why am I smiling? Because she's the love of my life, and through the years, it never changed. That's why I'm smiling. Because I'm crazy... Still crazy over that girl. That girl who's talkative, the best in archery, the prettiest, the one who topped the board, the most understanding girlfriend, the cutest... and the most lovely in my eyes.
If one day she'll be back in my arms. I swear to heaven I will never waste that chance again. I'll give my everything. Right this time. Right this time...
I knew Aya wasn't her daughter. I knew every bit of her features and none of it can be seen on the kid's visage. There was no resemblance at all.
"Paano kung sa ama nakuha lahat? Kagaya na lang ni Rios na halos lahat ay nakuha sa Daddy niya?"
Umiling ako. Kabisado ko na ang mukha ni Rios, at kahit halos lahat ay nakuha niya sa Daddy niya, alam ko pa rin na anak siya ni Rhi. Dahil pamilyar ako sa mukha niya, sa bawat detalye at ganoon din kay Uoiea...
Wala akong ibang magawa kaya dumiretso ako sa bahay nina Rhione. When I saw a familiar that was parked in their garage, naramdaman ko na ang pagwawala sa loob ko. Rios told me he met the girl in my wallet, hindi ko alam na totoo nga... at nasa bahay pa nina Rhi?
"Manang... uh, sino ang nasa loob?" kabado ang boses ko at parang nagtaka pa si manang.
"Kaibigan yata ng kapatid mo. Magandang babae..."
Ngumisi ako. Siya nga.
"Tito Zeus?!"
Kasabay no'n ay ang tunog ng basong nabasag. Nag-panic ako dahil baka nataranta rin siya... I saw her picking up the shattered pieces from the glass. Hindi ako makapaniwala na nasa harap ko siya sa mga oras na 'yon. Pero kahit sobrang lapit niya na.... Parang ang layo layo pa rin.
"I'm sorry," I whispered while staring at her so deep.
I'm sorry ngayon lang ulit tayo nagkita. I'm sorry for my past mistakes. I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for not being there when you needed me the most. I wanted to tell her all of those but I know it's not the right time to say it. She's uncomfortable, and I don't want to worsen what's in between us.
Pero hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili ko. When she was near me, I felt how much I long for her. I really missed her to death. I was just controlling myself... Gustong gusto ko siyang hawakan, yakapin, halikan gaya ng dati, pero hindi pa pwede...
To be close to her after so many years filled a big hole in my heart.
"Bakit naman gano'n ang approach mo sa kan'ya, Kuya?!" Sigaw ni Rhione na tila kulog nang maka-alis na ang sasakyan ni Uoiea. Gusto ko sanang ihatid...
"I just missed her expressions..."
But I know I was wrong. I saw pain in her eyes earlier. I know... she's not yet fine. She's still stuck in the shadow of pain I've made.
Nakarating kay Mommy na aksidente kaming nagkasama ni Uoiea sa bahay nina Rhione. Madalas siya sa opisina ko para magtanong ng paulit-ulit na tanong...
"When are you going to marry? Nagkausap na ba kayo ni Uoiea? Walang naging iba 'yon, anak. Kagaya mo..."
She always tells me I look so lonely. Na baka raw naiinggit na ako sa pamilya ng mga kapatid ko at pinsan. Pero ni minsan ay hindi siya nag suhestyon ng ibang babae sa akin. She knows who I only love, and the one I love is the only daughter in law she'd accept from me. We're both in favor of one girl...
"You two are not getting any younger... Also, I want a grandchild from you. I want a cute Weya
"I'm not rushing, Mom. I won't rush her again this time..."
I will never rush again, because from the past's lessons, the more you rush, the more things don't last. This time, I want us to last until our last breath decides when. For now, I'm going to enjoy the new chapter of our story. No rushing this time...
When I saw how she was eager to save a young girl, the first thought that came in my mind was that she really loves kids for her to react that way. Compared to other doctors, she looked more eager. Pero hindi lang pala 'yon ang dahilan...
"I fucking chased him!" Uoiea's voice thundered that night. She exploded after being patient for a long time.
I know she was bottling up her emotions... everything.
"I fucking chased him but he wouldn't want to listen! I texted him a hundred times! I called him a lot! And to tell you all the truth, I even went to Dubai! Alone! Just to explain, Maddizon! Just t-to clear my name from all of your assumptions!" her words muttered because of her sobs.
That was like a knife that minced my heart into tiny bits. She's not the type to cry. She's not the type to publicize her emotions. And now that she did it, alam kong sobra na 'yong sakit. I know she's already full of all the shits happening in her life. Kasalanan ko lahat, pero parang siya ang sumasalo sa lahat ng sakit.
I didn't know about it. Hindi ko alam na... pinuntahan niya ako roon. And she was alone? Just fuck it.
"I didn't cheat! And I-I will never cheat... I have loved Xydon so much! Na kahit hindi niya sabihin sa akin na palagi niyang kasama si Chantal, binibigyan ko pa rin siya ng chance na sabihin sa akin!"
Doon ko natanto na sobrang tanga ko sa lahat ng naging desisyon ko. And she was perfect... but I still broke her fragile heart despite the goodness she gave me.
How did I do that to her? I made her crazy thinking when would I tell her the truth. I know the feeling of being lied to... pero bakit nagawa ko pa rin sa kan'ya? Why did I make her feel it myself?
"I am not a cheater... He is a cheater. I went to Dubai... I went to Dubai only to see him... kissing another girl!" She was crying like a river and that's making me weak. "And it was my stepsister... He cheated with my step sister... Can y-you imagine how painful it is... to watch it live?!"
Sunod-sunod nang tumulo ang aking mga luha. To realize how pained she was makes me insane... Sobrang gago ko. Sobrang tanga ko!
I thought I already reached the limit of pain a person could feel, pero nang marinig ko sa kan'ya ang pinaka masakit na salita...
"I... I lost a baby!"
I couldn't believe it at first. I was stunned for a few seconds. I couldn't digest the words...
"I lost a baby... I lost my baby with him right after I went home... We had a baby... I lost it... I lost it!"
I felt like my heart was continuously being clenched by someone else. Halo-halo ang sakit na nararamdaman ko. Uoiea that was crying in front of us all, and the news that collapsed my system.
I cried while feeling the massive despair inside me. I punched Tiago multiple times on the arms. It was my fault. It was my fault why we lost our baby. We had one and we lost it... I've wanted a family with her, and it was me who ruined it. It was me who killed... the baby. Kasalanan ko ang lahat....
I groaned while crying. Naka-alis na ang sasakyan nila at naiwan kami roon.
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry, I didn't know anything." Hagulgol din ni Maddizon ang naririnig sa lugar. "I am really sorry."
I covered my face with my two hands. Panay ang pagmumura ko habang patuloy ang daloy ng mga luha. Pinagsisipa ko ang sasakyan doon. Hindi ko matanggap. We lost a baby... and she kept all the pain all by herself. How could I... let her battle everything alone?! Napaka walang kwenta ko.
Thoughts bombarded me again. Things could've been different by a single right choice. Pero lahat ng naging desisyon ko ay mali, the reasons everything falls dejected. I dwelled on it for a long time. I deserve the blow... I deserve being unstable again.
I didn't just fail as a fiance, but I also failed as a father.
And that answered why she couldn't accept me with ease in her heart. Sa dami ng pagkakamali ko, baka nga hindi niya na ako tanggapin pa. I've questioned myself so many times. Do I really deserve her? Should I still try to get her back? I was scared... that I might serve her the same pain again. Kahit sabihin na nagbago na ako... paano kung magkamali ulit ako?
But I wanted to prove myself. I wanted to give her the right love she deserves. If I'll choose to stop, that will mean I really don't deserve her. Gusto kong bumawi sa ikalawang pagkakataon. The past might hurt us whenever we see each other, but nothing would be as painful as seeing each other being taken care of and loved by someone else. Magiging masaya ako na masaya siya, pero 'yong sakit alam kong mananatili sa puso ko.
Gusto ko na ako ang mag-aalaga sa kan'ya. Sa ikalawang pagkakataon, sisiguraduhin kong tama na... tamang pagmamahal, tamang desisyon, tamang paraan para panatilihin siya sa 'kin.
I was watching her while she was playing with Rios and the kids. We went to Hawaii for a vacation. Sumunod ang ilang pamilya namin para makapagpahinga.
Looking at her, I know I already have the reason to call myself the luckiest man beneath this earth. Nasaktan ko siya nang ilang beses, pero mas pinili niya pa rin na mahalin ako muli. I know she's been in a situation where she literally gave up on me. Where she stopped loving me because of the obstacles I and life gave her. But despite all of it, she still returned. She loves me one more time... She swallowed all the pain just to give me another chance.
Giving up, heartbreak and unloving are part of loving. You know it's true love when you still chose to stay and love again after everything that made you realize it's not worth it anymore. You will always find reasons to make it seem worth trying again.
Our eyes locked and she smiled at me. Nanatiling seryoso ang mga mata ko dahil sa lalim nang sinisid ng isip ko dahil sa kan'ya. She could only make me do things out of my character.
No one could ever question why she was the one I only ever loved.
"I've been there, bro..." natawa si Zage sa aking tabi. I looked at him and his deep eyes were focused on his girl as well. "Where you will realize everything you could just by looking at her... It felt like all of the answers could be seen in her."
Napangisi ako. Good to know I wasn't the only one who could feel it. I thought I was the only one who got crazy because of love. True love it is.
Umalis si Zage at pinuntahan ang mag-ina niya. Uoiea went to me with her hair being swayed by the soft gust of wind from the ocean. Kinuha ko kaagad ang mga kamay niya para ilagay sa leeg ko. I slightly carried her and kissed her neck.
"Let's have a walk," I whispered and we started walking on the shore.
Bumaba ang mga mata ko sa malambot niyang mga kamay kung saan naroon ang singsing na matagal ko nang gustong isuot sa kan'ya.
I know I was the man who rushed everything. I wanted to raise a family with her in my dream age. I wanted her hand in marriage as quickly as possible for security. I felt like there was a race between me and time. Between us and time. I felt like there was a competition and our opponent was time. Na kung mahuli ako, kami, ay kahaharapin namin ang pagkatalo. Dahil ang oras ay nauubos, at hindi na maibabalik pa.
I believed that allotted time wasn't enough for us to enjoy our lives, that's why I wanted us to treasure every second and always be early in everything. Para masulit namin ang panahon namin sa ibabaw. Pero dahil sa pag-iisip na 'yon, mas lalo ko lang nasayang ang mga pagkakataon at ang oras mismo. Mas lalo ko lang nilapit ang sarili ko sa kinatatakutan ko: ang mawala siya sa akin, at masayang ang oras para sa aming dalawa.
But my love for her saved me. It taught me to be patient, to be content, and to enjoy the moment we have at present.
You will know it's true love when you're willing to change for you to deserve someone. You will accept the change because you know it's for the betterment of yourself and your future.
"Ang sabi ko dati, hindi na kita babalikan dahil ayaw ko nang maulit pa ang sakit na naranasan ko... Because it was traumatizing. But look at me now... Accepting you again because I know I couldn't love again if it's not you..."
Hinalikan ko ang gilid ng noo niya matapos niyang sabihin 'yon. It's both hurting and flattering at the same time.
"I stopped loving you. I turned my back at you. Sabi ko, siguro nga hindi talaga tayo 'yong para sa isa't isa... That maybe cupid flinched when aiming us both."
Natawa siya at ganoon din ako. I hugged her from behind while we were enjoying the view. We were watching the waves leave and come back. I will never make the same mistake again. A mistake that was repeated is already a choice and an intention.
"Pero tayo naman ang pipili kung sino talaga ang para sa atin. Sa dami ng lalaki, mas pinili kong bumalik sa'yo..." she said seriously.
I will never get tired of hearing her voice. I will never get tired of listening to her. Sabi ko nga, I could listen to her all day long.
"I love you so much," I whispered. I was too overwhelmed by the sequence of good events.
She chuckled. "Your I Love You will be unquestionable now. I've questioned it so many times." Hinarap niya ako at niyakap ng mahigpit. "I love you so much, too. I am so happy with you now..."
Right now, in front of the beautiful girl and the ocean, I received the most exceptional achievement I have ever had in my whole existence. And that is... Uoiea happy in my arms again...
We may reach the places we are currently in right now without each other, but it's not yet too late. There's more to life. There's more to achieve along the way. We could still continue our promises... We can make it alive again.
Dwieya, thank you for taking care of your Mom the times I couldn't. Thank you for being with her on the journey where I was supposed to be with her but I couldn't. Thank you, and I'm sorry that you didn't have the chance to live as you deserved. I love you. Mommy and Daddy will always love you. We own you.
"From this day on, we will enjoy the movement of time, Xydon..." she whispered.
Sinakop ko ang bibig niya habang hawak ang kan'yang likuran. She clung onto my neck and we savored the time as we should. Unbothered of time and what ifs this time.
"Together," she whispered.
I smiled and nodded. Things stop, but we could always continue if we want to. With the right person, there's no such thing as late. You will never be late. Every second of time is a perfect time.
"Together," I whispered back and secured her in my arms fully.