I had never needed an audience to make a spectacle out of myself.
The soldiers were as they always were, boring. But I knew better than to blame it on them.
I danced around them, pulling the strangest faces I could and making wild gestures with my hands although there was no reaction. My long and heavy red gown was slowing me down from my usual swiftness but I managed to fool around in front of everyone before the King and Queen entered the room.
''For all Saints, Sapphire, will you put on your shoes and stop messing with these poor guards?''
I turned to my older brother Taz breathlessly. He was standing right behind our parents, tall and serious with all the duties resting upon his shoulders. He was the oldest and soon turning twenty-five which meant my father would pass down his crown and become his advisor. With his long brown hair tamed in an elegant coiffe and a majestic blue tailcoat making his eyes stand out, it was hard to believe he had found no match yet. But here we were today, having another ball for him to find a wife from the various Ladies of our court.
''Relax Taz, it's not like they will talk about it once they're off duty.'' My older sister Esmee chastised him with her arms behind her back. She was poised as always, respectfully dressed in a dark blue army uniform but a sly smirk tugged at her lips as she watched me put on my high heels. I knew what she was thinking: high heels will make your feet hurt before the end of the night, they will slow you down in an eventual attack. They're useless in my humble opinion. I liked to think they made me tougher to pain.
My tall and beautiful sister was mistaken for my brother's twin most of the time, yet she was two years younger. She did look older for her age and her traits were scarily alike Taz'.
I had inherited my great grandmother's blond almost white hair and scary grey eyes, which got me the nickname of the Royal ghost at court, one of the reasons I had decided I wouldn't wear light colors anymore. But the damage had already been done and the nickname stuck.
Both my parents stared at me with small smiles. Being the youngest with two older siblings who made my parents proud already meant they had fewer expectations for me. I didn't have to become a perfect heir or a humble lieutenant, I could do what I wished and had barely a displeased sigh sent my way.
I took both my parents in, their hair turning grey and lines multiplying on their faces, it had shaken me a few months ago how they had seemed to age so suddenly. Was it my brother becoming King in the next few months or my sister falling in love? I couldn't pinpoint the exact moment, the exact situation that made them seem older. They were both in our country's color, deep blue like the oceans they controlled, my father's tailcoat very much the same as my brother's whilst my mother had a simple gown of silk that trailed on the floor, her bodice made of intricate laces over the silk.
She had convinced me to put on a more impressive dress made of satin and silk with tulles making the skirt wider. It went to the floor in waves of dark crimson red, the bodice made of silk and laces as well but where my mother's lace spread to the arms, mine stopped short to leave it strapless. More so, for it to hold up, my lungs had traded some useful space and my crushed ribs were now fighting the dress with every breath I took.
I used to complain whenever my mother would try to put me in something not fitting my siblings, making me even more of the black sheep of the family. But she once told me that red made me look fierce and untouchable and that was all I needed to be able to confront the many stares at the ball.
''You look regal darling.'' My mother couldn't help herself to comment on her wonderful work. ''But please stop running around, I don't want you to start sweating if it's not during a dance.''
''No one else would deserve my sweat,'' I said as I joined them, placing myself next to my sister, right behind my brother. I believed I was the best partner I could ever get.
The room became silent and we could hear the chatter beyond the doors leading to the ballroom, our people already here and awaiting our arrival. For the past month, we had thrown four balls so my brother could find his fiancé and our future Queen but so far he couldn't even name one Lady that was a possible choice. He was picky and although he danced all night long with countless Ladies, he never seemed to be talking much. But that wasn't a surprise, my brother had been raised to converse politics with grown men and taught war strategies in the training room.
''Alina has bought her wedding dress,'' Esmee whispered to me. Although my sister was gone most of the time with grown men, battling against the enemy and talking strategy, she had come out to our family last year when she'd met Alina, her soon-to-be bride. Unlike our brother, Esmee knew how to talk about something other than Royal stuff. Maybe I had taught her how to.
''And have you found yours? You know I've been dying to go shopping with you, it's getting closer.''
''I'm supposed to leave in two days, I don't see how we could fit the trip.''
Before I could respond, we were interrupted. ''Now, Sapphire, please don't be...'' My brother trailed off.
''What? Myself?'' I crossed my arms but he barely spared me one glance.
''That's one way to put it. Just don't mess around.''
''Taz.'' My mother scolded, ''Your sister doesn't mess around.''
''That's right, I fool around,'' I said sweetly, and before my mother could reprimand me this time, the doors were opened by guards to let us in the ballroom as Sir Patrick announced our family to our people. As always, Patrick didn't look at me because he knew I would make him laugh against his will. Maybe old, Sir Patrick was still very childish and I had a malicious pleasure to show it off.
The room was packed as always, with all the nobles and their families attending the celebration. The court was all there, from the kids to the elderly, making a path for us to go through. A fountain was stationed at the center and once we got nearer, my mother let go of my father's arm and they moved in synchronism, making water move on each side of them. In a swift movement, they threw it behind them and continued their way as my brother caught it.
He spread the water around the room like a dome which got exclamations from everyone. Most of our people were able to move the water around as well, but our family was known as the most powerful which had earned the throne to our ancestors.
With another swipe of his hands, he passed the control to my sister and offered me his arm like the gentleman he had been taught to be.
We both walked towards the throne, walking up the stairs to our seats as my sister created droplets from the dome and played with the lanterns spread around the room to amplify the light and make mirror effects. The room glowed in our country's colors, blue and black. It was magnificent as always.
When she dropped the water back into the fountain, the court applauded and she saluted them before coming our way.
Force of habit, I caught the whispers behind heavily jeweled hands and curious eyes coming my way. The question on their tongues was simple and redundant: why the youngest hasn't shown her gift as well? And the answer was simple as well, yet they could only speculate and spread rumors. I was a late bloomer, I had no powers for now and I was getting scared I would never have any. But I tried not to think about it and usually, it made me feel better. For a while, that is.
My eyes caught the necklace glinting around the soldier's neck and I shivered. People without powers were meant to serve the Royal family, they were meant to put on those magical necklaces and give up emotions whenever they were on duty. At the end of the day, they could take them off and emotions would come back to them. But otherwise, feelings make you weak and can control your actions. They had to escape fear, desire, and their most profound needs to make the right - dutyful -sacrifices. That's what our ancestors passed down to us.
My father walked forward as soldiers stood on each side of our throne, ''My dearest subjects, what an honor it is to live those life-changing days with you. But as much as we love reuniting weekly for my son to pick a wife, it is getting urgent that we move on with the celebration. As you all know, Bràstark is more resistant than ever and our ranks will need all the help they can get if we want to keep our families safe. This is why tonight is our last ball and my son, Prince Taz, will make his choice. Now, please make the most of your dance with him because this might as well be the last night you have a chance to become a Princess.'' Applause spread around and I wanted to huff. Being a Princess wasn't all that fun and I wanted to erase all those looks of envy as Taz chose his first dance.
Being a Princess meant sitting on a throne until the next gentleman, nobleman, or old disgusting pig asked you for a dance. It was forbidden to say no, which meant my consent was as much valued as horse sh-
''May I?'' A man in his early twenties asked me and I mustered the most perfect smile I could before taking his hand.
He was a dark blond - definitely bleached - with light freckles on his nose, and dark blue eyes constantly gazing down my chest as he started throwing me in circles clumsily. Of course, he would, he wasn't looking where he was going. ''I am the son of Lord Lanson, Dimitry. We have a cottage near the Western part of the country, right beside the Low tide seas. May I add how beautiful you look tonight? Oh, and I must tell you, we were well reputed on our trades at sea with the Air folks in Strasebirgh. And-''
This went on for the whole waltz, and then it continued with the next son of whoever for most of the night. My feet were killing me, but I never let it show as I swayed and acted on my best behavior on my brother's demand. I tried not to yawn as another talked repeatedly about his good seeds and how he could provide us with a boy to put on the throne later.
When the music stopped, I slightly curtsied and left the dance floor before another one could ask me to dance, fleeing as fast as I could towards a darkened corner. I found myself hiding beside a red curtain, which was the best hideout I could come up with and I found a guard there. He didn't look my way even when I huffed loudly.
''If you allow me.'' I mocked and without elegance, I used him as a pillar to get my shoes off. I groaned as I saw the blisters forming on my feet, ''Pray all Saints valiant soldier, I may have to amputate my feet. Oh, but what a tragedy,'' I leaned against the wall with my arm over my forehead dramatically, ''how will I be able to run from those pigs they call gentlemen? I may as well sign my death wish and choose the same side as my sister. Women seem to be of better manners.'' I sighed as I peeked around the curtain to watch my sister dance with Alina. She had been laughing all night long while I had to endure those men looking at me like I was a prize.
Even before coming out, Esmee never had to endure the same faith as me, she was often excused from balls for training reasons or strategizing, and when she was not excused, men went to her to talk about the war and our armies. It was more political than anything.
The soldier next to me nudged my arm which almost made me cry out in shock before I looked down at the flask he was offering, ''You might need it more than I.''
Stunned, I looked up to see his dark green eyes watching the room, yet there was a glint in them as if he was laughing. He didn't have a helmet - none of our guards did - but there was something I hadn't realized before. A black scarf hid his traits from nose to neck, the necklace usually at our soldiers' neck missing. I squinted my eyes at him, but still took the flask offered to me.
''Could have told me you were listening before, I'd stopped my rant.'' I gulped down a long sip and couldn't help but swear. Father wouldn't be proud.
''And miss those important words of a Princess? And I thought your kind of folks liked balls and dances.'' He teased and I took him in again. His eyes didn't ring a bell, but they all looked the same to me. Would I notice one wearing a scarf? Obviously not.
''It's hard to enjoy a ball or even a dance when your partner's attention is down your cleavage,'' I commented and watched from the shadows what people were doing. Most were dancing, others were simply gossiping or watching my brother dance with another Lady but still not uttering a single word. I snickered and took another sip of the burning liquid before handing it back to the soldier. ''How did you come on duty without your necklace?''
His eyes were searching the crowd, analyzing it, ''You'd think people would notice it instantly if one soldier wasn't wearing the right uniform or talked with the Princess. But commoners are all the same to your people.''
''Is it now that you kidnap me and ask for a ransom?'' I mocked although I started to feel uneasy, and saw the slightest change in him as if he wasn't expecting that.
''In another life, this would have been a very interesting meeting.'' He said before starting to walk away, keeping close to the wall. I frowned and followed him although I knew this was stupid - as much as drinking from a stranger's flask.
Once we passed the doors, he took off the scarf and took long strides toward the back door of the 'waiting room'. ''Hey wait,'' I said as I grabbed my dress and jogged behind him. My dress was making it impossible to breathe right but I continued. ''Who are you?''
His hand was on the doorknob when he looked back, a smirk etched on his face, eyes mischievous. There was the shadow of a beard on his sharp jaw, a wicked burn scar etching from the right angle of it to behind his ear. He couldn't be much older than Esmee, but his being vibrated with knowledge and experience to this life, the kind I never had. ''A simple commoner who doesn't belong in your court, Princess.''
He left with that and I simply didn't have enough air in my lungs to follow again. I was about to go back to the ball when dizziness took over and made me fall unconscious.