It has been more than fifteen hours since he left and it was clear. Even in the halls of his house and bedroom it was clear he wasn't around. Dare I say it the air roamed around freely in the house knowing he wasn't present. It somehow made perfect sense in my head that even the air was scared of him. And I found breathing a lot easier.
I watched the trees pass us by as the car sped through the road. I could feel the excitement bubble up inside of me at the pit of my stomach. I didn't even recognise where we were it didn't seem anything like the route we took with Anele and I don't think I would ever forget that route. I would forever wish I had made different choices the night before that morning.
Not even a single cell in my body thought of trying to escape. I have looked into that man's eyes and I would not test him. Lachlan was far from stupid and I would like to think my emotional decision making phase was over even though I knew deep down it was a different story when I was in front of him. Even if there were to leave me for hours unguarded I wasn't going to pull any stunt. I might as well call him to tell his men to come and get me. I just didn't want him to hurt me.
I looked at the dark blue gloves on my hands holding in a breath as I gracefully folded my hands onto my lap. The doctors could have covered up the scar but he said not too -to serve as a reminder that this was nothing, he would do worse. At least the hole has closed but I don't think I would ever be able to get the image of my hands with holes in them out if my mind, it was forever burned into my brain nor would I forget the pain.
One would never find me without gloves on well from time to time. From the scarring you could tell that there had been a hole there. I was better now because at first, at first sight I would involuntarily sob and I would feel like my lungs were failing me. Trauma. But enough of the negative today was about my peace of mind. Getting some fresh air as much as he said I was no prisoner I didn't know when it would be when I would go out again even though I only trusted his word. Lachlan kept his word it's one thing of everything that had been quiet clear to me. He was a man with a lot of mental issues but one thing I was confident in besides all else was that.
I looked at Annie as the car arrived at the stores she wasn't as happy and excited as myself but then again she wasn't the one who had been locked up so she could come here freely whenever she pleased. None the less I was still very happy, watching the amount of people around me for the first time didn't annoy me I hated crowded places but this time I was just grateful I was even around other people.
The moment I stepped in I fought to rid myself of any negative thoughts, I didn't even want to think about what would happen after this, I just wanted to feel the small taste of freedom that I had ever took so lightly before. Plus now instead of misery and sulking I would replace those words with room for change. It sounded ridiculous but I needed to protect my mental health.
"I didn't know your smile could be that big." Annie said slowly following behind me as I filled the cart up with everything I needed for my skin. Lachlan told me there was no limit when he gave me his card, as much as we were pretty comfortable Serenity was against wasting money and buying useless things as much as we could afford most of it.
At this very moment with his card in my hand if my heart or eyes even lingered on something a little longer I would get it, I knew there was no part of him that would care even though I would do it out of pettiness. I doubt he would even notice. One thing was for sure money was not an issue for the man and he didn't care how much I spent.
I particularly couldn't wait to visit the clothing stores even though I had other motives I was looking forward to it because there were somethings I actually needed and I was excited to get them, I asked him if I could get a few other things and he said I could get whatever I desired. I needed more comfortable clothes all the clothes in my closet were either fancy or fancy- even casual was not casual enough for me and a girl had grown tired of wearing his t-shirts.
I was planning on buying myself a lot of baggy clothes and more comfy clothes I doubt the Viking man would be too happy about it but I will just act clueless because he only seemed to like me in his big t-shirts or shirts only if I would wear nothing else by nothing else -not even panties. I didn't mind the big shirts and t-shirts but I could not continue going commando with just them on.
"I can't even remember the last time I was outside those walls, that's how long it feels like I have been there." I said watching the men who came with us the body guards assigned to us who have perfectly blended in keeping a distance. If I didn't know any better I would have thought nothing of them. There were not in their usual black suits parading around or standing in their posts.
"You know this could happen more often. He is a reasonable man.- in his way." She said adding the last part after seeing my reaction. I highly doubted that. As much as I have decided to play house I couldn't let my guard down and I wouldn't forget the fact that Lachlan was a very sick man. I just decided to not comment for my own sake.
My eyes skimmed over the products not finding my products I didn't like trying anything new on my skin. I had been using the same thing since my teen years and it treated me very well. I didn't like experimenting and that's one thing Anele and I would never agree on if she sees an amazing review she was willing to try it. I didn't trust anything plus I didn't want to use different things on my face.
"Tell me more about- them." I said as she helped me look for the specific products I had named. I needed to at least try and prepare myself. I made a list so I wouldn't forget what I needed when it came to what was almost depleted. I was the type of person who went to shopping for specific things and when they get to the stores she has forgot half of what she wants, so I make sure I just write it down.
"They are a family that strongly believes in the family code and respect- I'm telling you this because even if he was to place a gun to your head in front of them they wouldn't help you, it is none of their business, some might try and reason but they will not help not only is family more important but because they can not do anything when it comes to Lachlan-no one can." This made my stomach twist but I needed to hear it. I looked at her processing what she was saying, I could feel uneasiness spread through my body as much as I decided to a new approach there was still hope of a better ending.
"Isla -I don't want you to take him lightly, he is feared and respected for a reason. Even if you were to manage to get away you -it wouldn't take much from him to get you back. I'm not telling you this to scare you but I want you to understand how powerful he is, don't try anything stupid. I know you might have hope that someone from the family might actually help you I'm just trying to make sure you don't make a mistake that he will be sure to make you regret. I hope you understand me Isla. " She made sure she didn't break eye contact with me in her eyes I could see how desperately she wanted me to grasp this. I nodded my head showing her I understood.
I have never seen her like this maybe it was because I would be surrounded by murderers in a matter of hours- tomorrow night, I could tell she was worried. As much as I wanted to soothe her and tell her not to worry I knew she would only stop worrying when I was out of there all I could do now was listen and take notes.
"They are a very dangerous and typical mafia family and I use typical here very loosely because I lack the right word at this moment - they are far from that. I don't really understand their sibling dynamic but they are all very close-in a way, O'Sullivan is very protective of his family." He didn't seem human enough to care about anything it was news to me.
I tried to remember if he had told me this when I would speak to him on the phone while he was away and he would basically help me fall asleep. Lachlan was a man of a few words so during those times I was the one speaking -a lot. I sighed. And it was usually about anything and everything what confused me and surprised me was that he listened and remembered everything-even the gibberish. At those times speaking to him came very easily.
"His parents - what type of people are they?" I asked looking at the different types of hair care packages even though I knew exactly what I came here for. I wanted to savour this moment I didn't know when it would come again. That reminded me I really needed to take out my braids when Lachlan comes back they were still neat I was just tired, as much as my hands are healing from time to time they were still sore. I let my mind wonder as much as possible it was the only way I could keep calm.
From as many books as I have read with lead psychopaths I truly did believe that there was something they did- the parents, they contributed to his mental illness. Not all the time but majority of the time.
"I just want to give you some advice as a friend. You and Lachlan come from different backgrounds aye?" I softly nodded my head.
"Then you need to understand that you might have different beliefs, I think that is what will get you out of there still breathing." she said before moving along as I followed behind processing her words.
"His mother is very caring and dangerous. She puts her children first meaning you can't ask her for help- there is almost nothing she does not know." She looked at me making sure I understood. I wasn't going to ask any single one of his family members for help- at least I believed I haven't reached that level of desperate stupidity I would like think but hearing her say this made me feel sick to the stomach. But what did I expect, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
"All she wants are grandchildren- she really wants grandchildren oh and more wives and husbands for her children. She has a good heart - and wants what is best for her children and to expand her family. She wants them all to settle down. But she is very strict. She does hate fly by nights. That's why none of them are allowed to bring someone they will not-" she cleared her throated before continuing "-well not serious about into her house -at dinner." She said eyeing me. I was going to one of those tomorrow at night.
A lot of things went through my mind as I thought about what she just said her words slowly replaying in my mind. I could feel the fear spread from the bottom of my stomach to my entire body, it was getting a little hard to relax and keep calm as the sound of my heart beat ringed in my ears. She wasn't serious- right. She couldn't be serious. Lachlan wasn't serious about me I tried to convince myself- even though he has told me a handful of times I was never leaving him.
I took a deep breath in choosing denial otherwise I would have a panic attack the only thing that kept me going was seeing my sister and if I was never to leave this place- I stopped, slowly breathing in and out trying to slow down my heart rate, I couldn't help but panic. When powerful men who had the world eating out of their palm make statements like this anyone would worry. I finally seemed to get a grip of myself knowing panicking would get me nowhere.
"Are you okay?" She asked looking at my now calm facial expression I tried to smile but failed even though I thought I was now okay that feeling of utter raw fear was still at the bottom of my stomach, her statement was a hard thing to forget, I knew what it meant even though I didn't want to unpack it.
"Yes I'm fine, please continue." We moved around the store looking at things normally I hated this but today I would take delight in it I was happy Annie wasn't complaining. Plus it helped take things off my mind.
"-His father is his father. I've never been around him that much. His brothers may seem charming and friendly- well some of them but they are all very dangerous Isla so are his sisters, be careful who you speak to and trust no one they are all on their brothers side some of them might not believe it to be right but they would choose their brother over and over again before you." She said as I soaked up everything now I was really beginning to wonder how many of them are they.
"Well except Ailia. She's on the side that plays princess teacups with her." She said a smile making a way to her face, I'm guessing she was fond of this Ailia, whom I also figured is a child.
"They are not -terrible people- they are just different. They might be welcoming but you need to understand that they are one of the most powerful mafia families in the world for a reason. Now let's finish up here and then go look at some clothes." I didn't object I didn't want to get anymore nervous than I was plus I was feeling a little inspiration I wanted to go back and get my hands on my laptop so I was a little eager to go a bit faster. At times inspiration struck when I needed an escape.
Even though I didn't want to I couldn't seem to stop my mind from wondering. I wanted to know more but I just knew knowing more wouldn't help me in anyway, instead I would end up acting a certain way around his family and it wouldn't please him landing me in trouble and I didn't want any trouble from him. We continued doing some shopping and I really did enjoy myself and the fresh air I felt like I haven't felt this carefree in a while -well close to carefree.
....
I watched the beautiful garden that has been single handedly grown by Annie. She preferred to grow her own ingredients if possible, she sure had a green thumb everything looked fresh and beautiful. It was full of life. I wasn't really a getting my hands dirty person or a gardening person at that but I couldn't wait until I was fully recovered so she could teach me maybe I could also grow something. The thought excited me.
I have never even recalled gardening in my life but I needed my mind healthy and occupied. Plus the thought of growing anything in her garden excited me. She said she would teach me all that she knew, I was grateful to her for being so kind and open to me I don't know what of a mess I would be without her kindness and companionship.
"The car is waiting for you." She said behind me her voice soft. I slowly exhaled running my hands down the emerald dress that gracefully clung onto me accentuating my figure, it wasn't too tight but it clasped onto me the right way. It was appropriately low cut and it almost covered my feet but didn't touch the ground. A dress he had picked out for me, it reminded me of his soulless captivatingly terrifying eyes.
My braids were up in a bun that was messy yet neat with a few curls popping out in a cute way. I didn't want to give off too formal. A necklace of his choice adorned my neck and at least my favourite pair of earrings on my ears. I felt beautiful but the dancing at the pit of my stomach made me want to crawl in a box and disappear. He was waiting for me and disappointing him was not a choice.
They finished whatever they were doing sooner than he expected and he ordered I came to dinner to meet his family. The order- in a charming yet very commanding way. How could I refuse him. I turned around facing Annie looking into her eyes for assurance that I would be fine. She just smiled at me looking at me.
"You look- breath taking." She said still looking at me as if processing making me smile nervously before thanking her. I grabbed her hand one last time with a slight squeeze before going to the car that was awaiting me outside, it has been a while since I have been in heels, I found it refreshing in this instance as I took my steps into the car.
In the car I said a short prayer, I have been praying more than I used to I wondered if maybe this was God's way of bringing me closer to him because I couldn't understand my odds maybe this was punishment for fantasising and being obsessed with the dark romance books I have read and the secret wishes. I was still trying to grasp the fact that I would be surrounded by demented murderers in a few.
The ride was over before it even began I was too caught up in my head to even realise how long it actually took to get there even though I knew it took some time. I was busy going over what to do and what not to do. I didn't expect any less of a extravagant mansion judging from their sons home. The place screamed money, I looked around as the car made its way up the drive way to the door not before circling the fountain. I was in awe.
I counted in my head trying to pull myself together as the door opened, slowly chanting that they were also people- people who killed people I sighed gathering my thoughts. I was about to get out and thank the driver for opening the door for me and the nerve wrecking ride well the nerve wrecking I would keep to myself - I looked up to a pair of eyes - green eyes already on me, he held out his hand to me my hand covered in a emerald glove that matched my dress lightly rested on his, even though the contact wasn't skin on skin he still managed to send light shock waves through out my body. I gulped stepping out of the car with help.
My voice got caught in my throat as I stood before him looking at him. I was in high heels yet I was still not as nearly as tall as him. He still managed to tower over me with his intimidating height. The first thing I had noticed his hair was no longer in a bun but instead he had cut his hair, the sides neatly trimmed and shorter than the rest. His perfectly coiffed dark red hair suited and complimented him -I couldn't help but stare than again nothing wouldn't compliment this man. How was it possible that he looked more like a Viking now than before. He took my breath away. The man was a sight.
Somehow his features seemed sharper, his trimmed beard doing nothing to hide his sharp jaw. I started to feel nervous as he was just staring at me, his eyes drinking me up. The feeling of his hand across my waist brought me back to earth making me look away from him trying to stop my racing heart that I desperately tried convincing myself was because of my fear for him. He was in one of his obsidian suits, I would have expected him to have his suit jacket off seeing as he was home expecting the environment to be comfortable but it was far from that.
His palm found its way under my chin making me look at him it wasn't a minute later that he took my lips into his, selfishly yet gently pulling me closer as he yet again took my breath away yet this time I was aware and allowed him to.
"You look beautiful." He said after pulling away staring at me, he does this a lot but right now it just made me more antsy and nervous.
"Thank you- you also look very handsome." I whispered looking at his chest.
"Why do you look nervous?"
"You are staring-" I said chuckling nervously, a smile on his face. My stares were short and subtle his on the other hand, I don't think he even cared or was bothered when he was caught.
"Don't I always?" He asked lightly chuckling wrapping both his arms around me.
"I mean I'm already nervous. I'm about to meet your family and your parents -oh my -you know we could just go back and maybe take a shower..." I said with one eye closed peeking at him, the sound of his laughter filled the slightly chilly air, his chest vibrating making me look at him in awe, it was quite a sight maybe that's why he didn't do it often. He looked ...beautiful- sane at that it made me smile in turn hearing the sound of his laughter.
"Are you trying to seduce your way out of this?" He asked the amusement in his eyes as he watched me as if studying me. It was foreign to see him as close to being a human being but I liked it. And as much as he seemed close to human the aura around him was second skin and his eyes never lied.
"What-no! It was just a suggestion." I said feigning innocence. He raised a perfectly thick brow at me.
"I mean- It's been a few days since we have showered together." I said looking into his eyes as I placed my hands on his shoulders but then my hands started to tremble I couldn't keep them still so I flattened them onto his chest before fixing his tie and straightening it out as I looked at him unable to break eye contact -the memory of the times we showered together flooding my mind unexpectedly - making me flush, I felt like I was digging a bigger hole for myself but I couldn't seem to stop. I was so nervous, his eyes slightly darkened his grip getting a little tighter but not tight enough to hurt me.
"Don't look at me like that Isla." He said darkly chuckling a smirk on his face and a glint in his eyes, he didn't have to tell me twice, the warning behind his voice was clear so was the warning in his eyes, I slowly nodded gulping at the way he was looking at me.
"I will give you all of my time after dinner- I do hope for your sake you slept well yesterday. Let's go." He said making tingles shoot all over my body. Well that didn't really work and now I think I have gotten my self in something I will not be able to handle.
With one last kiss that felt like a promise making my body melt into his and taking my breath away once more. He lead me into his home with his hand of course around my waist. I couldn't for the life of me calm down my nerves but at least I was now more nervous about after dinner than the dinner itself. I just had to open my big mouth to my defence this isn't how I saw the whole thing going nor did I plan it.
...
Tell me what y'all think.
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Merry Christmas.