AUTHOR'S NOTE .................
HEY MY CUTIES.................. 🥰🥰
Umm a little late night update..☺️
First a fall sorry.. for being so late with the update..🥹🥹 as you know my exams are going on. So updates are taking time.. 🙃🙃🥲🥲
However next chapter is ready. Tomorrow new update will come... 🥳🥳
Thankk you soo muchh each and every one reading this... Story is getting an awesome response..🙈🙈❤️❤️ thanks to you all... Being my first story I am overwhelmed by your response...🥺🥺
Just one request please please consider voting and following it really motivates me ... 🥺🙏
Thankk you all soo muchh... And I love you all soo muchh....💝💝💝💝
HAPPY READING...............☺️☺️🤗🤗
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IN MAHESHWARI MANSION..........
RagLak 's room...........
Laksh - 'Swara ..... Swara... Pleasee...mujhe chor ke mat jao....pleasee... Swara I love you..... Swara....( Swara.. Swara.. please don't leave me... Swara... I love you...)'
Ragini was very very disheartened to hear this . Disheartened was an understatement. But she understood his condition that he was drunk. She wondered even if he was not drunk but anyways , he feels that , just that he is not that vocal about it.. From recent times he even said that to her , that he wants Swara back.
She slowly moved away from Laksh . She took out sleeping pills from the drawer. Then took the Nimbo Pani from the table and mixed a sleeping pill with it and again came to Laksh. She thought it will give Laksh a better sleep .
She caressed his face and said - ' Koi apko chor ke nehi jaye ga.. Laksh ji...shhh...( No one will leave you Laksh ji....)'
Ragini took the Nimbo Pani and helped him in drinking it . Within seconds of drinking of it Laksh fell asleep.
Ragini checked the time ... It was 3:30 at night. She went and sat in the balcony. The cold breeze felt her face. She started thinking about his life.
RAGINI'S POV..............
Kya ho gai hai meri zindagi . Yeh meri kismat nehi thi. Kya main itni hi buri hoon. Kya maine itne bure kaam kiye hai ki mera pati mujhse itna nafrat karta hai , mera pati nashe ke halat me meri behen ka naam leta hai.
(What happened to my life. This was not my destiny. Am I soo bad . Have I done such bad things that my husband hates me so much that my husband take my sister's name when he is intoxicated.)
It's all my fault. I should have accepted my fate that Laksh ji loves Swara. I tried to mess with everyone's fate. And now. Now my fate is messing with me . I played games and seperated Swara and Laksh . Now my fate is playing games with me.
It was me who wanted to destroy Swara's life . But here my life is destroyed. I thought Swara will suffer marrying Sanskar ji but she is happy.. living her best moments with Sanskar ji. And I .. I am getting insulted everyday by my love. Maine apne hi pair me kulhari mari.( I destroyed my own life.)
Today Swara has everything .... everything which I wanted in my life..... But Swara ....she didn't even ask for it but yet she got everything... But I fought with the whole world... I fought with own myself to get it and here I am ...just a married women with no love no respect nothing. A big zero ..a big zero... I could do nothing in my life...
I even changed myself , I totally changed my old self and became like Swara , but still .....still Laksh ji does not love me. That old Ragini had died long back and this I don't know who she said . Who keeps telling me to destroy everyone's life .. I don't who it is....
But at the end of the day... I know........ it's me ....... it's me only who does all this.
I am not jealous on Swara. In fact I am very happy that she got a true life partner who loves her soo much and whom she loves soo much. I want to see Swara happy. She deserves to be happy.
I understood that Laksh loves Swara not because her beautiful looks , but because of the beautiful heart she has. I could copy Swara's looks her dressing style but I could not copy not her beautiful heart , her care towards other people her sweet way of talking. I could not copy that.
I was so stupid how did I even think that if I seperate Laksh ji from Swara . Laksh ji will start loving me. I was soo soo foolish . Kisi aur ki zindagi barbaad karke main khud kaise khush rehti . ( By destroying someone else's life how could I be happy.)
I and Swara were soo close . We together as Swaragini brought papa maa together. I broke Swaragini to get Laksh ji. I harmed Swara to be with Laksh ji........ How could I..... I should not have done this. Yeh mere paapo ka shaza . ( This is the punishment of my sins.) . And Swara she has not done anything bad.. that's why.... that's why.. today she happy today and I am ... I am broken...
I loved Swara soo much. How and why did I turn against her . When did I become so evil. When did I start hating Swara so much. When did I start hating my sister so muchh.... Swara I am sorryy. I am soo soo sorryy....I still remember the first time when I commited a crime and then kept doing crimes I kept doing crimes. Even for me deeda was in coma.
Ragini tune kya kya kia hai. Tumne toh sabki zindagi barbaad kardi. (Ragini what have you done. You have destroyed everyone 's life.)
Sanskar ji , Swara and Laksh ji , today are leading a life which they never thought they would live . Laksh ji is living a loveless marriage with me , he loves Swara but for me they could not be with her. By god's grace Swara and Sanskar ji are happy and together. But this was not there destiny.... Swara was supposed to marry Laksh ji . She loved Laksh but for me she could not marry him.. Not only Swara , Sanskar ji , Laksh ji but I had also destroyed maa and papa 's marriage. Swaragini had brought them together and I broke their marriage. Even papa ji , maa ji , Chachi , chachu ... Maine sabko dhokha diya hai.. ( I have betrayed everyone.) And dadi maa , I have hurt dada maa the most . I have forced everyone to question dada maa's parvarish ( upbringing).....
When did I become so bad that I started destroying everyone's life.
It was not my destiny. But I have destroyed my own destiny with my own hands. If I wouldn't have played those games , may be Swara and Laksh ji would have been together.... Then I and Laksh ji would not have to stay in this loveless marriage and may be I would have been married somewhere else... with someone better.... But it was my decision to be a part of this loveless marriage... I will have to suffer it..
And Sanskar ji , through him I got a very good friend. Some may tell that it was because of Sanskar ji that I turned evil but no .. I realised it was never Sanskar ji , who changed me . That was my own evil mind who changed the good Ragini... the old Ragini , I was... Sanskar ji changed with time , he never did anything that would hurt Swara and Laksh ji , he had wanted to break their marriage because of his revenge. But he understood his mistake very fast. But I.. I did not understand my mistake. I kept doing crimes .....on and on... I kept hurting Swara... That Swara who supported me soo much. She was not ready to accept Laksh ji , because of me she accepted him. When I convinced her , that's when she was ready to accept him.
But I miss my and Sanskar ji's friendship. Sanskar ji was my only true friend. I never got a friend like him. He tried to correct my path. He tried to explain to me , how much wrong I was. But I don't know why I didn't listen to him. I wish I had listened to Sanskar ji... I wish.... He was trying to save me . Save me from destroying my own life but I did not listen to him......I was a fool.....I am a fool.
I wonder at times , if I had listened to Sanskar ji back then and not pushed Swara into the river , then Swara and Laksh ji would have been married and may be ... May be ....today I would be Swara's place. May be I would have been married to Sanskar ji..m Today I would get the love from Sanskar ji that today Swara is getting ...... Swara would be happy with Laksh ....And may be I would be happy with Sanskar ji.
But no no I... don't love Sanskar. I don't love Sanskar. I consider Sanskar as my very friend. A friend with whom I would have been married like Swara is married to Sanskar.
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN A MARRIAGE OF FRIENDSHIP NOT OF LOVE .... IT WOULD BEEN A MARRIAGE OF TRUST AND LOYALTY NOT OF LUST.. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN A PURE MARRIAGE NOT AN UNDESIRED MARRIAGE.......
But I don't have any bad eyes on Sanksar.... Neither I would..... ever ever want anything wrong to happen to Swara and Sanskar 's marriage. Nor would I ever do anything bad with them.
I don't know what suddenly triggered in me , today .. that I am thinking all these things. May be this is not suddenly , I always had this thing in my mind but was not ready to accept it. May be it is today that I realised Laksh ji can never be mine or accept me. How will he ??? I have snatched his love from him. Why will he accept me? Even if I were in Laksh's position I would have never accepted myself.
Today when I saw Laksh ji in that dirty road just like that laying , intoxicated I just felt soo soo bad... And today when he was taking Swara's name , I felt heart broken. But also I realised that I have lost Laksh ji.... totally not ...mthat I ever had him.... But realisation hit me hard .
Laksh always loved Swara. Previously , I thought Swara came between me and Laksh ji..... but noo..... It was my big mistake. I CAME BETWEEN SWARA AND LAKSH. Laksh ji was always Swara 's. I feel , I was blind all these days, like someone has tied a ribbon on my eyes. But today I have removed that ribbon from my eyes and I can see everything clearly now. I had soo many evil things. O godd...
I feel so vulnerable. Swara I need you . I need you... to share my feelings.
I AM FEELING GUILTY... VERY VERY GUILTY....I WANT TO APOLOGISE TO SWARA AND SANSKAR JI... I WANT TO APOLOGISE FOR ALL MY MISTAKES.
I got up from the balcony and went inside the room . I saw Laksh ji sleeping on the bed peacefully. I took my phone from the side table . I know this is not the right time to call her but I need to.
I dialled her number . Her number was ringing. I had no idea where she has gone for honeymoon Because she did not tell anyone. She picked up. I started anticipated.
In the call..............
Swara - 'Hellooo...' her tone was very sleep and very tired.
I had may things to tell... but.... but nothing came to my mind ... I am blank... totally blank..... What would I tell her....where should I start from...
My head ... My head ...is paining very much... Like someone is continuously beating my scalp with a hamme..... My vision was getting blurry and then started turning black...
The ultimate level of anxiety hit my brain. Feels like someone is pulling all my hairs from my scalp.
Swara - ' Heelloo...' she said in a rather irritated tone.
Swara - ' Helloo Ragini...... kya hua... bolo....itni raat ko call kia tumne.... Sunai nehi se raha mujhe... Hello ... Hello Ragini.....helloo.. Ragini....' she said in a caring tone this time.
But I cut the call..... and switched off my phone.
Call ends........................
Swara I have destroyed your life and harmed you a lot. But not anymore Swara . I won't hurt you anymore. I will go from here . I don't deserve to stay here. I don't know where I will go.... I can't go to Baari , because papa and dadi maa hates me . I don't want to be the reason of their sadness . And if I stay here Laksh ji will force me to tell Swara to get back to me. I love Laksh ji a lot but I can't destroy his life like this. He does not deserve me . After I go I will divorce him . After our divorce it's upto Swara whom she wants to spend her life with . Sanskar ji or Laksh ji. I will go very far from here.
TAAKI MERI NAZAR NA LAG JAAYE KISI KO.... MERI NAZAR BOHOT BURI HAI... BOHOT KAALI HAI MERI NAZAR....
POV ENDS........................
Ragini's old tears had dried up . But new hot tears are running down her cheeks. Her hairs flying due to the winds . Her under eyes are totally black.
She switched on her phone after sometime time and saw 2 missed calls from Swara. She opened her phone's gallery and started seeing her and Swara's picture. She mumbled 'Yeh Swaragini hai...' More tears rolled down her cheeks . Once Swara and She was soo close . They did not get to spend a lot of time together but the little time they spent together was very memorable for both of them. Ragini was thinking about all her happy moments with her and how she destroyed everything. She wanted to hug Swara badly and wanted to apologise to her whole heartedly without any drama...keeping aside all ego and attitude. She wanted confess to her , again all the crimes she did on her and wanted to apologise. But she could not. She saw the pictures and kept sobbing . She had a folder in her phone 's gallery , named SWARAGINI where Ragini and Swara's pictures were only there. There were 1206 pictures. She saw each of them and remembered the backstory of it.
The night was going to be very long for her.
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IN MANALI.................
At night (3:30 am)............
Swasan are sleeping in their room after their intense love making.
Swara was sleeping when suddenly her phone vibrated. Her body was in pain due to the intense love making. Her body badly ached when she tried to move . Every inch of her body felt like unmovable. But somehow she reached her phone and picked up without seeing who the caller was.
In the call............
Swara - ' Hello....' no one replied..
Sleep was taking over her. She had travelled the whole day and after that intense love making. Everything together made her feel very tried.
Swara said in an irritated tone this time - ' Hellooo....'
Then she saw the caller and then softened her voice and told - 'Helloo Ragini...... kya hua... bolo....itni raat ko call kia tumne.... Sunai nehi se raha mujhe... Hello ... Hello Ragini.....helloo.. Ragini....'
The call was cut .......................
Swara thought may be because she was in Manali and Ragini was in Kolkata, the network connection was not strong. She checked the time and saw it was 3:30. It's soo late and Ragini is still awake then there must be any problem. She became a little tensed and called her back , but it said switched off. She called again , it was again switched.
Then kept the phone aside and thought to call her in the morning. Sleep took over sleep.
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AUTHOR 'S NOTE..................
HI MYY CUTE DUMPLINGS ......... 🥰
So did you guys enjoy the chapter?
Actually in this chapter I wanted to bring out Ragini's feelings.. how she felt.. because she is a very important character of the story.
Hope you guys didn't feel bored...🥹
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