They put an end to this disgusting moment. A smile floated on Puen's lips as he began to dance again. Julia winked at me before bursting out laughing and moving to the rhythm of the music. I'd gotten her message. It was crystal clear.
A stranger passed me with a drink in his hand. I stole his drink and was satisfied when the alcohol settled on my tongue. I needed more. I needed to numb the pain in my chest, the fury rumbling in my stomach. An arm slipped around my hips and a body appeared in front of me. It was Andy, the guy who was a little too clingy. But strangely enough, I didn't care as he raised a bottle in front of my face.
"You want?"
"Yeah, thanks."
I emptied the scalding liquid down my throat.
"Wow, easy," he said, snatching the bottle from my hands. ''We've got all night.''
He pulled me closer to him and took a sip in turn.
"You look upset."
That was an understatement.
"Is it because of the guy you like?"
I didn't answer, but he took my silence as affirmation.
"What did I tell you? Don't give it another thought. At least for tonight."
"We'll have to start not talking about it anymore, right ?
I stole the bottle from him. He smirked with an air of assurance.
"I'll do my best to make you forget your worries."
Soon there was not an inch separating us. I felt his breath close to my ear. My head began to buzz and my movements became less supple. I'd thought the alcohol would be enough to sever the bond that drew me to Puen. And yet, after glasses of all kinds of liquors, my whole being wanted to feel him, my eyes sought him. My lips called his name.
"Did you say something?"
"Where's Puen?"
"Forget your role as manager. Let him enjoy himself. He's capable of looking after himself."
I pushed him away.
"No...I have to find him."
He laid his hand on the back of my neck.
"You must think about yourself tonight." He reminded me.
"I...I can't do that. Because he's me."
Huh ?
I frowned. That came out wrong.
"No...I'm him."
"I think you're completely wasted." He laughed.
"I'm incomplete without him."
His expression changed. All amusement left his face. He looked at me intensely, his head tilted to one side.
"That's him, isn't it?"
My eyes widened as my heart raced. My scattered mind reconstituted itself enough to understand that we were on a downward slope.
"No, he just a friend." I breathed quickly.
He rolled his eyes.
"I'm not stupid, Talay. I shed light on the whole affair. What I don't understand is why you let him kiss someone else. I thought you two had a beautiful mutual love story."
Teeth clenched, I took a step back. I'd never thought he could be so perceptive.
As if I couldn't help it, my gaze shifted to Puen. Except he was gone. Where had he disappeared to? Rebecca was still there, which was abnormal. She followed him around as if she was his shadow.
"Where did he go?"
"He probably went to take a break from the crowd. You should find him on the roof."
"Thanks." I said, about to leave, when her hand closed around my arm.
"I don't know all the ins and outs. But if crap that would waste your time can be avoided, avoid it. You seem like a smart guy.
I didn't answer and walked away. I spotted the fire escape. The steps seemed unstable under my feet and moved from right to left. I'd never been a good drinker. I couldn't stand the effects of alcohol. I felt like I was going up forever, and that one day I'd reach heaven.
Finally, I reached the top floor and opened the door. The fresh night air entered my sinuses and did me good. I saw Puen standing by the railing, his head swaying to one side.
"Are you all right?"
He turned abruptly and almost lost his balance. He caught himself on the railing. His gaze lingered on me for a long moment before a smile appeared on his face.
"Ah, it's you." He replied simply, in a pasty voice, before returning to his original position.
I could see his body relax. I approached him.
"What are you doing on a rooftop when you're drunk? It's dangerous." I lectured him.
"I couldn't take it anymore," he sighed, shrugging his shoulders.
"Of what?"
"Everything."
He gave me a sideways glance.
"Where's Andy?"
"I left him on the dance floor. I'm taking a break too. It's too hot inside."
"Andy's nice...but be careful. He's a heartbreaker."
"Why are you telling me this?"
" You two seem to get along well."
"I could say the same about you and Julia," I replied coldly." You were eating each other's faces. It was the stupidest thing you could have done, Puen. People saw you."
"They have to respect a confidentiality clause from the moment they walk through the club's doors."
"So there's really something going on with her?"
He turned to me and leaned his elbow on the railing.
"Nothing at all. She's just a friend."
"Do you know that she loves you? It's disgusting to give her high hopes."
He laughs.
"Rebecca doesn't love me. She doesn't know anything about love. She just wants me. I'm the only man who can resist her."
I was skeptical.
"It's going to go badly if you respond to her advances."
"You should go and find Andy if you're going to reproach me."
"There's nothing going on with him."
He let out a laugh as dry as a desert.
"It's okay, I'm not going to say anything to you if you try something with a star of the agency. You're an adult, you can do what you want, just as I'm entitled to do what I want. " He added as he headed for the door.
I grabbed his arm.
"Where are you going?"
"To get me a drink. You've ruined my moment of solitude."
"No. You've already had enough."
His face crumpled and his eyes darkened.
"Leave me alone ! I can't stand being around you. Don't you understand ?"
The harshness of her words hit me right in the chest.
"You're starting to say things that don't sound like you. Stop right there or you'll regret it."
He released his arm and slowly moved closer.
"I mean it. Every time I see you, I feel miserable. You remind me of what I don't have."
I tried to convince myself it was because of the alcohol, but didn't it act like a truth serum?
The look in his eyes that had expressed anger two seconds earlier was now filled with sadness. I watched as his hand came to rest on my cheek. I held my breath.
"I can't accept that I'm back and he's not. I pretend nothing's happened. I go to work, I smile, I go out with my friends. But nothing's right...without him, nothing's right. I feel incomplete."
A tear escaped his eye.
"I ask myself a lot of questions. What is he doing? How much longer do I have to put up with this? Will he eventually forget me, stop loving me?"
"Puen..."I said with a tied throat.
"I can't stop imagining that he's got his real body back... that he's touching me, kissing me."
I was on the verge of crying too. All I wanted was to take him in my arms. Why was I holding back? There was no one around.
"Puen, he'll never stop loving you," I assured him.
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because... Puen, I'm..."
The truth wanted to come out of my mouth.
"I'm..."
His half-closed eyes were focused on my necklace with the hourglass pendant. The top of my shirt was unbuttoned. My heart stopped beating and my lips began to form panicked sentences, then no sound came out.
"Let me explain..."
Puen took two steps back. His eyes closed and his body leaned to one side. I caught him in time and held him against me.
"Puen?"
He didn't answer, completely unconscious. I lifted him entirely.
"I'll take you home."