Caroline
**
"I'm sorry."
She had just woken and was ambling to be the first to breakfast in the Great Hall when she heard her name being called from the common room. Caroline turned to see Sebastian stretch from an armchair, robes wrinkled, hair in disarray, and looking far too exhausted for a man painfully victorious from their argument last night. He hurried to her as she waited impatiently at the foot of the stairs by the fountain before he shifted nervously and uttered his simple apology.
"You're sorry? For what?" She narrowed her eyes at him— Sebastian didn't do apologies. He would rather let it stew, be forgotten, and swept under a rug. She should have known that despite the recent quiet moments that he had not changed—after all, it had been the status quo for the past few years, why should last night be any surprise?
He sighed, looking sheepishly as he averted his eyes, "I said some things last night...things I didn't mean."
Caroline snorted earning her a frown, "Seriously, Sebastian? We both know you did mean those things—"
"I didn—"
"Yes, you did," she ground out, "Because you don't know how to stop. You don't hold back your emotions or opinions especially when it concerns everyone else but you."
He glared at her, "Caroline... I'm trying to apologize."
"You make an apology after all these years?" She laughed darkly, tilting her head to the side, "After you completely ignored me for two? Not once did you reach out to speak with me. No— after calling me useless, you opted to completely pull away and assume the worst of me. After three years of friendship, you just chose to walk away. To top it off, you had apparently chosen to listen to the ramblings of a new girl who had no love lost for any of us. Yes, I know— Ominis has been quite vocal about his dislike of her. A girl who might I remind you, is the reason Marvolo came after me and Phineas in the first place."
She had heard the rumors swirling of the fight—her name sprinkled in between the supposed lovers' spat. They had spun into the girl turning into a fire breathing dragon. Why? She honestly had no reason to trust the words of portraits and gossipy students. Sebastian, want her? Doubtful, such a tale must have spun from a silly misunderstanding— they likely left of the fact that Sebastian likely wanted her gone.
"I had no involvement with Marvolo," he said tersely.
"No, you didn't," that much she could acknowledge, "But that single thing doesn't excuse the fact you've been hurtful these past few years. Last night being just one instance of your behavior. I don't know what you're hoping to gain from this, but do you seriously think a simple apology is going to fix anything between us?"
He at least had the decency to look guilty at her tirade, head down and eyes peering up at her with as much Anne innocence as he could muster, "How can I acquit myself?"
She frowned at him, shaking her head and steeling herself— don't...it's always an imbalance of give and take, "I don't know... you seem to know all the answers though. Why don't you figure it out yourself?"
Caroline turned leaving in a huff up the stairs, resolving to have skip breakfast and wander the castle grounds to stew.
**
She had found her way past the sleeping dragon and into the Muggle Studies classroom among the lit bulbs and silent room.
It was different being in here without Phineas... the lack of exuberance and music made the room feel cold and empty. The pile of letters to Phineas lay before her—she answered them without fail as they came.
My sweet Caroline,
It is with happy news that I write to you that I have made it safely across the pond. Six days! A feat for Muggle ships apparently— they have these engines and such— monstrous and powerful things. Imagine if those were attached to brooms!
I was fortunate enough to run across another wizard so soon after disembarking—an older gentleman from the ship no less—coming back from a venture over at our Ministry, Gideon Goldstein. Did you know that 'muggle' is hardly known here? They call them no maj or no majs here. He's been a kind fellow taking sympathy on myself and inviting me to stay with him while I get things together.
Fear not, my sweet— we shall be together soon. If I must embark on a journey there again to be with you I shall.
Love always,
Phineas
Dearest Phineas,
It relieves me greatly to hear that you've arrived safely and well and found a Wizarding family at that.
I do hear the Americas are experiencing quite a revolution among the muggles. Do not worry too much on my behalf— please stay safe. I will find some way out of Marvolo's reach and be with you soon.
Love,
Caroline
My sweet Caroline,
At Mr. Goldstein's suggestion, he said he would send word to my father to let him know of my safety and whereabouts. I do hope he manages— he and his wife have been truly a blessing. An old couple they are with nary children in site yet they give so much back to their community. They have fed, cared, and continue to introduce me to the ways of the new world.
I cannot wait to show you this place— I miss you.
Love always,
Phineas
Dearest Phineas,
Perhaps Mr. Goldstein's letter has been received well. Your father has invited me to tea next weekend.
The Muggle Studies classroom is lonely— I do miss our dances along the corridors. Please let me know if there's anything you'd like me to send.
Love,
Caroline
**
Afternoon tea with the Headmaster was a silent affair. He looked drained, exhausted, and somber as he placed a cup of tea in her hands with a sad smile.
"Ms. Rookwood," he sighed as he sat behind his desk, "I'm afraid my family will need to pull our bid for your hand."
Caroline looked up in quick surprise, masking the fear she felt as she set the teacup back down.
The Headmaster cleared his throat, his eyes glassy, "I'm afraid Phineas is no longer suitable."
"I'm afraid I don't quite understand..."
The wind swiped at the glass as the headmaster's face grew grim, "I received a rather unexpected owl from a Gideon Goldstein. And while I appreciate knowing my son is alive and well I do not— absolutely not appreciate my son telling me off and refusing to room elsewhere than that... that muggle's home."
Caroline was confused— surely it wasn't because of such a silly reason like that, "I'm still not following sir..."
The headmaster narrowed his eyes defiantly, "If Phineas cannot uphold our name and our beliefs in the new world then he has no business being a Black."
"Surely you jest—this is your son..." she trailed off trying to reason. But the headmaster shook his head, shoulders sagging as he leaned back in his chair.
"I am not, Ms. Rookwood. My family must remain constant in our beliefs lest our name and kind be sullied. As of today, Phineas Black, II is no more."
**
It had been a few days after her afternoon tea with the headmaster, when a snowy owl landed before her with an envelope addressed in her name, Phineas' unmistakable scrawling across the letters. She smiled, thanking the owl as she gingerly took the letter, and placed it within the confines of her bag before she turned her attention back to her breakfast.
The nights prior had not gone well— neglecting to eat dinner and citing an overwhelming tiredness to retire to bed early. Caroline had tossed and turned— Sebastian's words and her meeting with the headmaster milling over in her mind.
As much as she was loathe to admit, he was right— Phineas was not allowed to come back. And thoughts of leaving and the consequences weighed heavily ok her mind— Ominis being her primary concern.
"You're not going to open it?"
Caroline peered up to the sound of Sebastian's puzzled voice before she gave him a cold stare and took a sip of her tea, grimacing—earl grey. Ominis and Imelda were more discreet with their stares as they listened and looked upon her with curiosity and concern.
"I think I'll spare you the sordid details."
And she would— she had spent the last night wiping away stray tears to avoid wet splotches on a parchment she penned, with the intention to visit the Muggle Studies classroom before her trek inevitable trek to owlery.
Because today, she was planning to say her farewells to Phineas.
**
Caroline's rooms had felt stifling and too cold after she left the owlery despite the fireplace crackling and burning as she tossed and turned. The weight of Sebastian's words had clung to her and the final resolve in her trek to send the letter off to Phineas made being in the Slytherin dorms too bittersweet. And so, she resolved to make her way to the Undercroft for a change of scenery. It was one of the few places Caroline had not danced with Phineas.
She sighed as she entered the Undercroft, the boxes and old cauldrons dusty from lack of use or cleaning. It appeared that the boys or the recently expelled girl had hardly cleaned or organized the room since fifth year. She walked through, lighting the candelabras as she made her way towards the back wall, the pile of boxes, cauldrons, and sheets lay forgotten since the last time she visited.
The wave of her wand and a few muttered spells set to clean the forgotten items, twisting, shaping, and fusing the objects into cozy armchairs and sofas, a soft rug appearing underfoot from a lone sad sheet, the stray boxes molding into soft large floor pillows. Her eyes focused on the empty wall once hidden behind the stack of cauldrons, the wave of her wand altering the stone to move for her for a large, makeshift fireplace.
Caroline sighed—her spell would hold the rest of the year. She groaned at the softness of the rug, as she removed her slippers to stand before the fireplace, wrapping her sleeping robe tightly around her waist before she lit the flames to warm herself—how silly, to seek comfort in a lonely place—she thought.
Here, she would not be bothered by her cloying thoughts. And here was the perfect place to bring the pile of letters Phineas sent her.
She was not seeing Phineas again. And Vincent would not allow her to marry Phineas, not when his family cast him out and promised the Rookwood's nothing to gain. Because the privilege, of indulging and marrying beneath them, was only given to the male heir—not her.
Be happy, find love for me— for us— she penned. Caroline could not promise that Phineas's patience would yield a light at the end of their tunnel. And though she wanted to be his only, she could not deny him the possibility of finding another if she could not get out from this predicament.
And Marvolo... she grit her teeth—not knowing what to make of the man. He was her only choice in the matter right now— unless another brave soul dared to challenge him for her hand. She doubted she would have that sort of luck and the thought of an eternity with Marvolo was sending her into a pit of despair.
A loveless marriage... that was what she had to look forward to.
Reality has set in as she tossed and turned the night prior. It would not be a whirlwind romance like her father and mama. Unlike her father, Caroline had no pull to change hers and Phineas' fate. And unlike her mother, she had to accept that her love life would not be promised happiness: it was simply a business transaction—nothing more. The sooner she accepted it, the sooner she could plan how to deal with it.
"Caroline?"
She peered behind her, brows rising at the appearance of Sebastian's figure—she had not heard the grate of the gate when he entered.
"What are you doing here?" He asked her, his cheeks turning a slight pink at the sight of her in her nightwear—again. Her free fingers drew the robe closed as she glared at him, recalling the last encounter she deigned to grace his presence with sleepwear. She ignored him as she turned back towards the fireplace.
"Are those..." Sebastian's voice trailed off as his footsteps quickened to her side, grasping her wrist to eye the letters from Phineas in hand, "Caroline... what are you doing?"
"What does it look like, Sebastian?" she deadpanned, pulling back from his grasp to move towards the makeshift fireplace, "I'm burning the letters from Phineas. Because you were right."
There was a silence behind her as her hand dropped the stack into the licking flames, lingering at a spark much like the night Phineas last held her hand, her eyes closing to breathe in the smell of smoke and wrap a cold embrace around her heart.
"I'm sorry," she heard Sebastian whisper behind her, as she scoffed.
"We've been through this. No, you're not," she quipped as she turned to him, sitting on a sofa to hug her robes tightly to herself, "I was wrong and completely naive."
For a man who always seemed to relish in victory, Caroline thought it odd that Sebastian's face fell.
"I didn't mean..." he trailed off, unsure as he sat across from her.
"I know what you mean, Sebastian. But the fact of the matter is— you're right," she smiled coldly, "You are right—and everything just put into perspective of what my life is. Of what it always will be as a Rookwood."
"And what's that?"
She turned away from his gaze, staring at the last frays of the letters being singed and blackened out, "A business transaction. There is no hope for someone in my position to find love."
"That's...that's not true, Caroline,"
"Isn't it? The Blacks just pulled their bid, Marvolo's my only suitor. And I doubt there are many that are brave enough to take on the Gaunts."
"You could have other suitors."
She nearly laughed at the hopefulness in his voice.
"Like who? Ominis? We both know we'd strangle him for doing such a thing," she laughed drily, "Who else? Recently widowed and elderly Archibald Greengrass? Or perhaps the thrice married Phillip Rowle? Or maybe the Ollivanders would put in a bid?"
"I really am sorry, Caroline," she turned to him at the painful whine of his voice. He had sat next to her with a frown, his hands gingerly reaching for hers.
The cold touch of his hands swallowed the warmth of the fire interrupting her descent into the inferno of her thoughts. For once, he did look sorry— his face was full of pity for her and eyes hopeful. She gave him a sad smile and his hand a squeeze before standing to leave, "I am too, Sebastian..."
**
"You promise you'll have fun, won't you?" She asked, fussing with Ominis's scarf as she waited with him at the front gate. Spring holidays were here and she was delaying her inevitable return home for a few days. Vincent had owled her to be on her best behavior for guests or rather a new suitor. Thus she was focusing on the happier news that Garreth was taking Ominis home to visit his family.
"Yes, Caroline— I promise, "He sighed, casting her a soft smile and patting her hands, "Now I need you to promise me that you'll be of open mind and have fun this holiday."
She snorted raising a brow—opened minded? How silly, "A bit hard when mama has more open mindedness for the both of us."
"Hmm, I meant everything else," he said much to her growing confusion before he sighed further, "Just...owl or floo me if things get to be much? And please enjoy your birthday."
She rolled her eyes, pulling him into a hug with a resounding yes as she felt Ominis pat her head before the sound of Garreth's voice pulled them apart. The permanently cheerful Weasley gathered Ominis' trunk with his as they locked arms to make their way to Hogsmeade.
If anyone deserved to be happy, it was Ominis.
Caroline remained by the gate, watching as their figures became smaller in the distance before calling for Tessie.
**
The familiar tug and pull of Tessie's apparition gave way to the sound of rolling waves, sunny skies, and the feel of warm air on her skin as they popped into her mother's Italian villa.
"Mia cara!" Caroline felt herself engulfed in her mother's exuberant hug letting out a giggle as she tried to steady and follow her mother's spin around the patio.
"Hello mama," she sighed with a smile as her mother pulled back.
"Oh my sweet Caroline— we have exciting days ahead of us! So much to do! And our guests have arrived— Vincent just picked them up at Durmstrang of all places."
She was hoping the slight panic in her face wasn't showing. Durmstrang? That was quite odd and worrisome. She followed her mother towards the familiar veranda before hearing an excited call for her name in the foyer.
"Caroline!"
She turned, confused at the sight of her brother and a familiar figure standing next to him— dark brown hair, brown eyes, freckled and looking nervous in casual robes and a suit.
Sebastian?
Her eyes flitted between her brother's Cheshire like grin and Sebastian Sallow's nervous smile before the dawning realization washed over her.
"Dearest sister," Vincent nodded, "I'm sure you need no introductions. Young Mr. Sallow here has volunteered for a chance to bid for your hand. A fine choice, is he not?"
"I see..."
A cold smile worked its way on her lips as her shoulders tensed at the news. Was this why he was being so nice to her? The back and forth of his emotions made much more sense— his scornful words of Phineas and his letters, his apologies, and sudden change in behavior.
"Hello, Caroline," he said softly with Anne's trademark innocent pout.
"Mama, why don't we give them some time to be reacquainted?" Vincent grinned, holding out an arm for their mother to lead them towards the veranda. Her cold smile was still plastered on her face as she nodded in understanding, watching as he shifted from foot to foot.
"Mr. Sallow, what a startling change of heart you're had."
"Caroline—" he sighed moving forward a few steps towards her as she willed herself to stand her ground, "I'm sorry... I was just trying to help."
Her hands clenched as her feet moved her forward to whisper tersely to him, "Help? Tell me— exactly what are you, without money or power to your name standing to gain from this?"
She watched as he opened and shut his jaw with a strangled cry, his eyes searching and pleading with hers. She scoffed, rolling her eyes as she turned to walk towards the veranda.
The gall of him...he was an absolute hypocrite.