-ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ-
"Green" I said.
With that, George immediately took off his jacket and shirt, pulling me into a rough but sweet kiss.
Is this what it's like to be with someone you love?
This feels like deja vu.
We make our way to the bed, still sharing a heated kiss.
Pulling away, I look George in his eyes.
Am I doing this because of my hormones?
Didn't I want to save myself?
What if this doesn't work out?
"Dream?" George talks to me, rubbing my cheek to make sure I'm alright.
I gulp again.
Is this right?
Should I do this?
"We don't have to do this Dream" He reassures me.
"I know.." I respond.
He looks me in the eyes, searching for something.
Probably what I'm searching for in his; a sign of regret or being uncomfortable.
Neither of us see a sign of this, or maybe George just missed my slight uncomfy feelings.
As he gives me a kiss, he takes off my shirt; staring at me.
'Is this right?' I keep asking myself
"God you're so fucking hot.." He says breathlessly, kissing my neck and collar bones.
I groan, getting the satisfaction of my needs.
But I can't stop but think if this is wrong or not.
"George?" I let out, being uncomfortable.
"Hm?~" He looks up at me. His face switches up.
I think he knows I'm uncomfortable.
I frantically look around, what's happening?
I feel like the world is caving in on me.
"Dream?" George says, seeming confused.
I breath out, my breath unsteady.
Am I dying?
"Dream, are you ok?" He asks, studying my face, searching for what's wrong.
I feel like I'm dying.
I can't breath.
George hurries to get off of me and sit me up.
I can't help but choke on my breath.
"Dream, please communicate with me, what's going on?" He asks me.
I know he genuinely cares.
But I still feel like I'm being swallowed whole.
Why can't I breath?
I choke again, not being able to breath anywhere close to normal.
"Shit. Your having a panic attack" George runs to the bathroom grabbing a glass of water for me, running back in and sitting infront of me.
I stare at him crying.
I feel bad.
What's wrong with me?
"Dream it's ok, your ok. I'm right here" George reassures, holding my cheeks.
When I look at him, all I feel is guilt.
I just saw him as the hottest guy in the world a couple days ago, why am I freaking out now?
"Dream, please talk to me" He says quietly, trying not to scare me.
The only thing I manage to say is choked up; "Am I dying George?"
George looks upset now, did I just ruin everything?
"No- no your not dying Dream I promise" He says to me.
"Can you drink some of this for me?" He says while holding the cup near my mouth.
Grabbing the cup, I'm shaking.
I'm shaking?
It feels like im having a seizure or something.
Regardless, I trust George and drink some of the water.
Most of it I choke on, given the fact I can't breath.
But George helps me through it.
"Here," he says, grabbing my hand and putting it on his chest, "breathe with me".
He takes deep breaths so I know when to follow.
Over time I start breathing normal again but why did that just happen?
I feel so vulnerable and weak.
"Dream? Can I hug you?" George asks.
I nod and pull him into a hug, still confused.
Rubbing my back, George huddles into my shoulder.
"George..?" I quietly ask.
"Yes?" He answers, pulling away from my grasp.
"What-" I can't form a sentence.
I'm so scared.
"You had a panic attack, it's normal I promise, Dream" He answers, giving me a peck on the cheek.
I sigh, relieved, also feeling weak and scared.
"I'm sorry" I say while crying.
"No- no no, please don't apologize Dream" He begs.
"I just- it feels wrong to-" I get cut off.
"You don't owe me an explanation. It's ok. I'm the one who should be sorry, i should've payed more attention to your body language instead of my hormones".
I sigh, I dont know how I feel about us.
Either way, I lay down holding my arms out, hoping to cuddle with the man I think I adore.
He lays with me and snuggles into my chest, which I find super cute.
Is his cuteness really distracting me?
I giggle to myself at the thought.
George looks up at me, wondering what I'm laughing at.
"Are you ok?" He asks me.
All I do in return is start laughing histaricly.
"Dream?-" he starts.
"God you're perfect" I say while giggling.
"You make me so giddy" I add, all I can do is smile while watching George's scared face turn to a happy one.
That night they fell asleep in each others arms, content with the way things are going.
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Hi luvs, this is my first editors note, I don't have much to say other than that if your going through stuff like this (panic attacks frequently) your not alone. Recovery is possible and you will get there.
My DM's are always open, I'm there if you need someone to talk to. I'm always here, even for a simple chat so don't be afraid to reach out!
❤️🩹