Forgive me, Kinkou Order, my friends, my family, I can't do it...
I dropped the pistol as soon as I lifted my index finger off of the trigger. I fall to my knees in defeat, crawling as fast as I can to the back of the bench. I pull onto Akali's shoulders as I lift myself up, then wrap my arms around her. Akali starts to weep into my shoulder, silently to not reveal any sign of weakness to me.
I drop the toughness act and turn into a baby, letting my stoicism go for a different change of pace. I can feel a surge of regret, sadness, and defeat as I cry into her. My tears are something I have not felt in a long time as they completely dampen my face. One tear, one slight frown was never enough for what I truly feel day to day.
After I let out a total of 10 teardrops, I counted, which is an incredible record for me, Akali feels comfortable to let it all out. My statuesque demeanor returns, but I still can't get rid of the surge of emotions within me.
Akali: <MY LIFE WAS FLASHING BEFORE MY EYES!!!> WHY?! WHYYYY?! WHY HAVE YOU DONE THIS, WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?! WUH... UH... I-I TRUSTED YOU-
*CRYING ENSUES!*
Y/N: <I'm sorry... I'm sorry Akali...> You will never forgive me for this... I am sorry...
I gently run my hands up and down her back as she clenches my back even harder. She squeezes tighter, more than I'm able to handle, but I handle it anyway. She continues crying and I resort to bringing my hand up to her head. I pat her head, running my hand through her slicked, tied-back hair.
Y/N: <I'm not going to do it. It's okay, I'm not going to do it... I'll never do it again, I don't care what they say, they can't make me. Fuck this, fuck this, FUCK THIS!!!> Fuck my cover, fuck the government... Just let it all out...
Akali: Y-you pulled a gun on me... w-why?
Y/N: I just said it... I-I feel awful about it, please don't make me say it again, please...
Akali: Right... y-yeah, y'know I should kill you for this...
Y/N: Please do... Do it now, if you must. I would understand...
Akali: However, I'm better than the demon that I was. The murder-bot that was bred to kill shit with no discrimination, like you. Pulling a gun on a friend, on someone who was willing to accept what heinous things you've done already. First my boyfriend, then me?! I BET YOU KILLED YASUO!!!
Y/N: Akali, shhh-
*SHING!*
She pulls back, her makeup ruined. Her kunai goes for my throat, and I can feel it slowly cut into me as she continues to push. If it goes any deeper, I'm not going to survive, I must talk fast.
Akali: Did you? I knew it was you because if it wasn't, you'd be dead alongside him. Admit it... you did it...
Y/N: Y-yes-
Akali: What was that, trust-breaking FILTH?! Fucking snake...
Y/N: IT WAS ME!!!
She pulls the kunai away, putting it back from where she got it, which I have no idea of. She stares at me, trickling her eyes down to my neck. She drags her finger across my bleeding neck, which was cut a little worse than a bad paper cut. She feels my blood between her two fingers, then looks back into my eyes.
Akali: I-I think... I w-want to be alone r-right now...
Y/N: I understand.
Akali: L-leave... Leave right fucking now...
*JINGLE-SLAP!*
She throws Seraphine's keychain at me, right in my face. I catch it in my hand after it hits my face, bruising something for sure.
Akali: GET OUT!!!
She shoves me backwards as I let her, sending me into the grass. She rolls off the bench and snags my gun right when I try to get up. I guess I didn't fully understand the situation I put myself in. She aims it right in between my eyes, contemplating using it. Her form is tense, and compromised, as I can see her hand fidgeting violently.
I am forced to get desperate, scurrying as fast as I can. Never have I ever had this form of defeat in my life, perhaps I have, just not in a very long time. I have not felt anything like this, these weird, warped feelings since I was a boy, perhaps 14 or 15 maybe. I was able to bust out of her front door. I waste no second thought, even leaving my clothes there.
I did everything Akali demanded, getting in Sera's car, and shooting straight out of her driveway in the SUV. I keep my foot down until I reach the end of her street, where I drop my head onto the wheel, after adjusting it of course, because it was adjusted for a gnome previously. I still drive until I arrive somewhere safe. I can't go to Seraphine's for the risk of her knowing what Akali now knows.
I can't go to anyone's for that matter, I must go back to the club. I have a place waiting for me, but now I'm afraid Graves won't get me those papers due to Evelynn. I had his business card, so I sent him a text, hoping he can just send the papers to me. This is the biggest shitshow I think I have ever witnessed. Also, thanks Piltover for my new form of butchered English as well.
No ghost of Kayn in sight, no Binna, just an empty club left open for me and only me. I lock all the doors with my keys, and even lock the door to my private office before I go to bed tonight. My mind as well as my body is sore, just from all the stress and anxiety that was pushing my body from just those short moments. For the first time ever, I choked, without the intention of choking.
I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry Akali... I'm so sorry-
A SNOOZE ENSUES!
I wake up, finally with no sharp pain in my back. However, I feel immense pain in my chest, my heart, my stomach, my head, and it's worse than any feeling I've ever felt. I feel broken, completely useless, words just unable to convey the current things I am feeling. I can hear knocking on the door, followed by a drowned-out, unfocused voice of my head hostess.
I drowned her out myself, just consumed... I wish I were dead, for what HELL... this has been, that I have brought upon myself and others just trying to live normal lives. They never bothered anyone and would only hurt a fly. The knocking grows more intense, so I am forced to get up and unlock the door, only in sweatpants, and beyond disturbed. I am back to my silence; I know it well.
Binna: <Ah, so you are alive, okay! So, you are... still here? I thought you went and found a new place...>
No response.
Binna: Hmmm... <How was the party?>
All I give her is a form of grunt, jamming my hand onto the door frame.
Binna: <Fine, don't give me an answer. You know what'll happen. I'll find out from one of the other guests that frequents this place!>
Y/N: <The party was horrible, and that's an understatement of my misery. Perhaps becoming friends with popstars was too much. My back is fine, but nothing could be worse. I would like to be alone as my mind proceeds to clash with itself.>
Binna: <Of course, of course! You don't look too good...> Get some rest, okay? You know, your workers care about you too, and so does your head manager...
Y/N: <Thank you.>
Binna: <One last thing!>
Y/N: Yes, Binna?
Binna: What should we do about the popstars in question? You want us to... ban them?
Y/N: As much as I would hate doing it. I say that's the best course of action to prevent conflict at this business. <Good idea, now please leave me alone.>
I gently shut the door on her, then fell right back onto the mattress. Graves has gotten my text, and sent me the papers for my place right away. I signed them, paid the fees requested, and now I am the proud owner of a new condo. My own space, which I will have to furnish myself in the meantime. I need to return Seraphine's car on top of what's already been said.
Too many responsibilities for how I am feeling. I am NOT going to be messing with any of this bullshit anytime soon. I deserve to just lie and rot in this bed. I've never had to kill innocent people before in my life, ever. Everyone that I have killed, easily in the hundreds, has been done with justification, reason, or that they were scum of the planet. I have become the very thing that I was made to hunt...
With all of this being said, I'm not quite sure I can just ditch them. I want to make things right if it's even possible.
This all starts with giving them some space...
And time for me to mope...
I try my best to go back to sleep, but I can't. I spend half my day lying face down on my bed, followed by lying on my back to stare at a wall. I don't check my phone at all as I do so, not like I have to. I feel the unbridled rage, the fire, the urge to do something very violent to get every ounce of frustration out of my body.
THAT'S RIGHT... I remember now! Vi was going to talk to me about another thing, but Caitlyn shushed her right away. That does it, if they need my help, I assume it's something involving Ionian, but hopefully something very violent. I get up and go right to my locker, because I'm going to need my-... Right... I forgot... I do not have a suit. I open my locker in disappointment to find MY SUIT!!!
Y/N: <What the fuck?>
I cussed in Japanese as I examined the jacket to find no hole that ripped the back in two. Inside the suit, it's lined with velvet this time instead of a plain black. However, it's nearly identical, but a slight bit shinier. I take a look at the new pants, and a note falls to the floor. Let's take a look...
"Y/N-sama, we have BIG money, please have suit. Yours, Binna"
Under that, she drew a little smile with what looked like a wig. I move my thumb, revealing more.
"P.S. We have added more money into our security, so we have fold-out armories behind the paintings in the staff office. Working with Jinx on weaponry."
Well, that's great news! I've only been gone for a day and millions of things have happened! I leave my private room, without a shirt of course, and immediately start feeling up the painting like some form of drug addict looking for a stash.
Finding the button, I open it, revealing not many weapons, but a couple. Two of a bartender's best friends, double barreled shotguns. I am not aware of the model, but I can tell by the size that it takes 12 gauge. I find ammo in there too, which I take for myself.
I fit my new suit on, putting the shuriken back in my coat pockets. What I wished would fit in my jacket does not, so I am going to have to visit Jinx and just get them to chop it apart. Assassin's are all about precision, but when you are as hell bent as I am, as angry with yourself as I am, you tend to not mind as long as anyone who wrongs you or your friends is turned into a bloody pulp.
I make the short walk to Jinx's place, walking inside nonchalant with a shotgun on my back.
Worker: Haven't seen you in a while, island boy, how can I help you? Jinx is currently indisposed.
Y/N: Is she here?
Worker: I'll handle any business ventures for the time being.
Y/N: I need some servicing done on this age-old relic...
Worker: An old side by side... okay...
I dropped it on the counter in front of him. He adjusts his working gloves before he picks it up. He opens it, looks inside, and pops the barrels open to see if anything is messed up.
Worker: Looks fine to me...
Y/N: Make it a handgun.
Worker: Ah, okay, I see. You know, you could just buy a handgun, she's got loads in the back. Tell you what, since Jinx has been... rather busy, you and I can just cut a deal. Got some bums tryna take shelter out back. Do that, I'll take this in exchange for a uhhh... tool you can keep in your jacket.
Y/N: Sure, sure. Just out back?
Worker: Yup...
I hear him toss something metallic into a garbage bin on my way out. Probably the old shotgun and goes back to grinding out a rod for something. Upon exiting, I see what he's talking about. They're not even bums or squatters, they're just kids tagging the back alley with their gangster stuff. "Firelights", written in big, bold, jagged letters. These kids could be like... Akali... and become artists with their talent...
Oh... Akali... I need to avoid thinking about her.
Y/N: HEY! <I just got a tip from the owner, you can't be tagging here!>
The one guy in a mask, with shiny rings in his dreads, comes up to me. Yeah, sure, he's built, threatening, but he's still short. He pulls it down, and his face looks awfully familiar. I swear I've seen it somewhere, maybe at "her" house.
Guy: We don't speak weeb, cracker.
Another kid: Yeah, whatchu tryna cosplay as, buddy?! Look at this... fake Yakuza fraud... they swallowed them up in Ionia years ago!
Y/N: Hmmmm... You can't be tagging here, get lost. The owner's not a woman you want to piss off.
Guy: Oh yeah? Pfft, fuck outta here...
Another kid: Yeah, we ain't botherin' nobody!
Y/N: If you kids don't pack up...
I picked up a spray can from their box. I toss it up and down in my hand for a bit as I give them a death stare.
Y/N: I'm going to have to do something I really... really want to do.
Guy: Oh, so you think you hard-
*BINK! Subtle paint rattle...*
Guy: AUGH... FUCK MAN... what the he-augh...
As he comes up to give me a shove, I weave beside him using I clobber him upside the head with a rather mean haymaker, sending the bottom of that spray can into his perfect cheekbone, and it sends him onto the filthy alley ground.
*BINK! Fizz... BOOM!*
The bottom of the spray paint exploded when I threw it down at him, knocking him clean out from the impact. It sprays blue paint all over the side of his face, and sprays all over the girl who was crouched down against the wall.
Girl: AH!!! Fuck! Ugh... *Spitting noises*
I start marching towards the girl next, but the other guy steps in. It's another street kid who I dodge away from, weaving his hit with what looked like a cinder block.
*CHOP-CHOP!*
I hit his armpit, then his neck and that stuns him. I get ready to jam the brick into his face when I see a figure come running into the alleyway behind him.
*BONK!*
A baseball bat hit him on the head. The kid drops to the floor, unconscious. He gets dragged away by the other two kids who had the sense to run away. The figure was easy to recognize now and that man in question was none other than...
Kayn: Y/N-CHAN!!! <I HOPE YOU STAYED STACKED!!!>
I crack my knuckles, hopping slightly to loosen myself up. I ditch the disbelief that he isn't dead for the fact that I need to kick his ass again, right here right now. After getting a look at his glowing red eye, and his psychotic grin, I'm ready to go. I wish I had a fight theme; I like to imagine I have one, that would be badass, wouldn't it?
Y/N: Hm...
I smirk as we get in our stances. Finally, I get some action that I've been longing for. Perhaps I may not have to visit the Medarda frat house I had in the back of my mind.
Kayn: HYAAA!!!
*WHOOSH!*
I dip out of his way, propping myself up with my hands. I managed to land a kick on his behind, resulting in him losing more stability. Before he could turn around, I grab him by the collar of his shirt.
Y/N: HRRRAH!!!
I swing him over my head, aiming for the dumpster.
*METAL SMASH!*
I send him into the dumpster, and he falls off of the lid and back onto the floor stunned. Grabbing his hair, I punched him back into the floor from his face.
Y/N: HYAA!!!
*PUNCH!*
Kayn: YAHOOOO!!!
Y/N: <What the fuck?!>
*KICK... KICK-KICK-KICK!*
He throws his legs up in the air, spinning on his head to kick me four times, knocking me onto the ground, confused.
Kayn: <I hope you stayed stacked...>
Y/N: Grrr... RAAAH!!!
I excessively yell in frustration, shooting up to my feet from all my rocking momentum. I run at him in a fit of violent rage, fueled by recent events. I dive, grab onto his shoulders, rear my head back, prepared to give him a devastating blow as my feet rise up off the ground.
His face was filled with wonder, not fear.
Y/N: HRAH!!!
*THUNDEROUS HEADBUTT!*
It shoots blood out of his nose and mouth, easily shattering what was formerly his nose. It takes me onto the ground on top of him, and he's blinded by the force.
Kayn: Ugh... <What a hit, Y/N-chan!>
Y/N: Hah... You were just what I needed!
I get up onto my feet, wiping my nose after that hit. When I start to walk backwards, I watch Kayn get up, twirling his baseball bat around. He cracks his jaw, then blows out a chunk of blood from his nose.
Kayn: <Where do you think you're going? Akali trusted you... I have to teach you a lesson...>
Y/N: <You don't get to mention her name. I can keep her safe without being by her side all day all night!>
Kayn: RAAAAH!
*WHOOSH!*
I spin out of the way of his dash towards me, stealing his bat from his hand as he's thrown himself into a dumpster. He tries to block my hit with his guard, but I break it with one well-placed swing.
Y/N: HAH!
*BASH!*
He falls to his knees, and I develop my inner sadist when I shove the bottom of the bat into his mouth. I learned this when I suffered almost the same fate when fighting Shen. I hold the bat, but instead of a twist or a lever pull, I bring my foot around.
Y/N: HEH!
*KICK! LOUD CRACK!!! KAYN SCREAM!*
His mouth gushes blood as he falls to the ground. He's giggling as he's panicking with all his injuries to his face. His scream was so loud, I could hear birds on the roofs of Zaun flying away. I drop the bat by his side, picking him up, then rolling him into the dumpster.
My bloodthirst has been quenched, and I couldn't have been more satisfied beating the stress out of myself. I fix my suit and adjust my shoulder after realizing what it did. His kick must've hit my shoulder out of place, then fixed itself when I slammed against the ground.
Y/N: SIR!!! I solved your squatter problem. Looks like they were just kids tagging the joint...
Worker: Ah, good! Jinx'll be happy, maybe that'll get her to stop making cannibal comments... Anyway, I got some ideas for you here. You looked like a classical, modest man, so I have a weapon to make fights a quick work for ya. You ever fire a Glock before?
Y/N: Yes, I have, actually...
Worker: You ever fire one in full auto?
Y/N: Like... one of those illegal switches?
Worker: Sort of... but no-no, this is standard.
Y/N: Ugh, I don't think... I can handle a bullet hose like this. I'll hit the first shot, but anything after that, I'd be wasting money.
Worker: Well, you could always take this shotgun I chopped up for ya. Works with the 12 gauges in your coat.
He slams the chopped shotgun I had earlier. I do him one better, taking all the ammo out of my coat and leaving it with the shotgun.
Y/N: Not a G18, give me something with burst fire.
The guy takes everything off the counter in a little frustration. He fetches an older box from down below. I open it up once it hits the counter, revealing exactly what I was hoping for. I picked up the Beretta 93R from its box, along with the spare magazines. It's an older model with the wooden grip, just beautiful.
Y/N: I won't need the stock, but I'll take this...
Worker: It's yours... you helped me out a lot today.
Y/N: Thanks... you have a good day...
He goes back to wrenching on something in the back. I take the gun, the magazines, and place them in my coat. I take the ammo and put that in my coat next, which I'll have to find time to load into the magazines. I leave the shop and go back to the club where I plan my next course of action.
Wonder how I can get back to Akali after she simmers down, because there's no way she's on speaking terms with me, not now, not ever. I'll need a friend to get in there for me.
Instead of thinking about this however, I'm greeted by Caitlyn and Vi, leaning on their car when I arrive.
Caitlyn: Y/N, we got a problem...
Vi: Finally, I convinced her to get your help. We're gonna need it...
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Author's Note:
Poob