I was lying face down on my bed when I heard a knock on my door. I murmured for whomever it was to come in and got up. Rae entered the room with a tray of hot chocolate and a jar of Nutella and cucumbers. It was already summer vacation, and a week had already passed since that incident at the side of the school. Everyone had already heard about how Frankie got his ass kicked by a girl. I know because one of my friends called my house phone stating it. And everyone knew the cause of Rae’s anger. So all sorts of stuff were spreading about me, like, how I sicked Rae on Frankie, and stuff.
“’Sup, girlie?” Rae said, handing me a cup.
“Not much.” There was another knock at the door.
“Hey,” my twin brothers said simultaneously, “You good, Kandy?” For once they were actually worried about me, and not just there to see Rae.
“Yeah, just a little upset. I’ll get over it,” I sniffed and took a sip of hot cocoa.
“Do you want us to beat that Michael guy?” said Bryan. I shook my head.
“What about that Frankie dude?” Ryan asked. I chuckled.
“I think he already got a fistful of Rae. So, no thanks.” Bryan came in and sat at the edge of my bed.
“You know we’re here for you, right?” he said.
“Yeah, and if you need anything, we’ll be happy to oblige,” Ryan said.
I gave them a look, “Who are you and what have you done with my brothers?” Bryan smacked the back of my head and Ryan pinched my cheeks super hard. “That’s more like you guys.” I brushed them off. “Look, I’m really fine. Okay? When have I ever let anything like this get to me?”
“Never,” Ryan said.
“Yeah, but you’ve never came home crying before, either,” Bryan pointed out. It’s unusual for them to notice stuff like this, but it was kind of sweet of them. At times, they could be pretty crude, but when it’s like this, I can’t help but be reminded of why I do put up with them. It’s ‘cause I love them.
“’Kay, ‘kay. ‘nough of the sappy, mcgrubby, stuff. Get out. Me and Kandy need to talk,” Rae shooed them out.
“It’s ‘Kandy and I’.” My younger brother, Kenny, came into the room. “Hey, Dee. How’s it going?” Kenny is my little angel. He’s sweet, reliable, super smart, and cute to boot, unlike our older brothers. Something tells me that when he hits his growth spurt he’ll be voted most desirable. But for now, he’s my adorable, baby brother that I’ll always love, even when he reaches his rebellious stage.
“Hey, leave already! Kandy’s fine. I got this,” Rae said, and began pushing him out.
“Kandy, you know, them bullying you is just a cry for help. A desperate need of attention that they never get from their parents. If anything, it’s only because you resemble a motherly figure.” Kenny said, matter-of-factly.
“Or the fact that I let them bully me,” I said blandly.
“Then don’t let them. Why don’t yo-”
“Kay, kay,” Rae interrupted, “Please, leave. We need to talk about girl stuff.”
“Does this girl ‘stuff’ consist of boys or the female reproductive system?” Kenny asked, totally serious.
“Boys,” Rae answered.
“I’m out!” Kenny quickly left the room, leaving me and Rae alone to “talk”.
“That kid is too smart for his own good. What’s his IQ? Like, 200?”
“176,” I corrected.
“Same difference.”
“So, what did you so desperately need to talk about?”
“I have this idea,” she paused and looked at me. Something about that look set me on edge.
“Yes, go on,” I said warily.
“They made fun of you, just because of what you look like…”
“Uh huh, I think that might be the reason.”
“Well, what if we gave you a total body makeover?” she said, but it seemed like there was something else.
“That would solve the problem, but there’s something else, isn’t there?”
“You see through me every time…” Rae sighed, “Kandy, don’t you feel any resentment towards Michael and his hoard of mentally challenged, faggots?” I frowned a little.
“Not particularly, why?”
“Geez, you are like a saint, Dee! Open your eyes! Feel the anger. If you leave it pent up inside, you’ll be like Adam Sandler in that Anger Management movie. You could explode any minute like Buddy said.”
“Rae, I’m not going to explode.”
“Then do this for me. Please?”
“Do what? Rae, what are you getting at?” I asked, irritated.
“I’m talking about revenge on those losers who would never let you alone. I mean, you’ve never done anything to them, and yet they bother you constantly.” She dipped a finger in the Nutella jar.
“Revenge? Rae, do you even know what you’re saying?” I asked, “Why do we need to take revenge? And how? It’s not like I have anything on them.”
“We’re not blackmailing, we’re going to break their souls.” Rae’s eyes gleamed at the idea.
“Souls? Don’t you mean hearts?”
“Heart is just a simple way of saying ‘I like you’. Remember the term ‘soul mate’? We’ll make Michael fall for you so bad, that he’ll think you’re his soul mate and-”
“Michael? What’s Michael got to do with this?”
“Just shush, and listen, okay?” I shut up and leaned against the headboard. “Michael was the one who hurt you. You’ve been nothing but nice to those people and they turn around and shun you for it. How well do you even know this Michael, hmm? How do you know that he hasn’t been talking smack about you behind your back? His new slut, Hailey, obviously talks about you to him. He could be easily brainwashed. I mean, look at how he just tries to fit in with the crowd. He’s like those teens who try to find their identities through different people and when they do, they try to match it with others around them. He’s like a mirror. The only thing he doesn’t reflect is his self.”
“Are you done with your monologue? Michael has always been that way.”
“No, I’m just getting started.” She takes a big gulp of her cocoa and continues, “You say he’s always been that way, which might be true, but don’t you think he acts that way just to fit in?”
“No, I think he’s just being his usual self.”
“You mean, uncaring, selfish, and arrogant? Come on, Dee! Why are you defending him?”
“Because I know him.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Yes, I do.”
“Dee, you obviously don’t and you know it.” Rae folded her arms across her chest and stared at me pointedly.
“I’ve known him for nine years,” I said resolutely.
“Yeah, but what do you even know about him?”
“I-I…” She got me. I had nothing to say. What did I really know about Michael? Sure, I’ve known him for a long time, but there’s nothing I know about him. I don’t know his favorite color, or foods. I don’t know his favorite movies or even music genres. I knew nothing and it made me feel even more upset.
Michael was a total stranger to me, despite our brief friendship in the third grade.
“Dee, let’s face it. The Michael in your head and the Michael in real life are two totally different people. He’s just a self-centered jerk, and he hurt you. As a friend, I feel that we have to do something about it.” Rae grabbed my hands. “Dee, please?” She looked at me with pleading eyes. I held up a finger.
“G-give me a couple of d-days to think about it.” Rae looked a little disappointed, but nodded. Then I looked up.
“If…I said if,” I said as her face brightened, “if we were to do this, how would we go about it?” She hopped a little on the bed and began speaking rapidly.
“Okay, first we’re going to work on your physical features. Your skin is already perfect, you don’t need a tan, you’re already naturally cute, and all that’s left is your weight. We’ll begin morning exercises and afternoon exercises for two hours. Afterwards, we need to get you on a healthier diet. All those carbs you’ve been consuming has been showing, no offense…” She looked at me.
“None taken,” I said and she continued.
“…and since you’re an amazing cook we wouldn’t have to worry about such things affecting your appetite, although I will miss your lasagnas. You always put the right spices and herbs, and the cheese is always so good and stringy, and… ugh, just make the lasagna as a special treat, please?” I laughed and nodded. “Then we’ll work on your stuttering. You’re going to be talking a lot, so stuttering is out of the question. We need to teach you to flirt. I’ll put together a promiscuous dictionary and guide book that’ll probably help you.”
“W-wait, I have to be promiscuous?” I said, not liking the idea at all.
“Well, duh! How else are you going to get his attention? You’ve got to have him vying for your attention. Make him want to want you. Having other guys surround you would just be a bonus. The real target is Michael and you know he only goes for girls that are…let’s say not like the sweet you.” I mulled over this for a bit. This is a little weird.
“So, you’re saying I flirt with him a little, and then go for other guys to make him jealous?”
“Yes! Exactly! All guys want the unattainable. Why do you think girls always play hard-to-get?” I thought it over and shrugged. “Look, it’s getting late. Please say you’ll really think about this.” She grabbed my shoulders and started shaking it, “Please!”
“O-okay, I-I promise!”
“Alright, I’ll be waiting for the happy news!” And she sashayed out of my bedroom.
A couple of days passed and I was still mulling over the possibilities. Should I? Would it work? Do I really want to do this? A knock came at my door and Kenny stepped in.
“Dinner’s ready. What are you thinking about?” he asked.
“Nothing much.” Then I looked at Kenny. Kenny!, I thought, maybe he can help! “Hey, Kenny?”
“Yeah?”
“What if, hypothetically speaking, a certain someone wants to change so that they’d be able to alter the way people look at her? Should she do it?”
“Well, hypothetically speaking, she should only do what she’s comfortable with. If she wants to change, it should be for her, and not for the satisfaction of others. You coming to dinner?” he said.
“In a minute. Go first.” Kenny left and I let his words sink in. Satisfying myself and satisfying others? Did I want that? Would I be comfortable with myself if others accepted me? Would it still be considered satisfying others if it made me feel good? After several minutes of my internal debate, I finally came to a resolve. I picked up the phone and dialed Rae’s number.
I've decided to break Michael Soloman’s soul.