I sat up on my bed abruptly the next morning in a zombie–like state. I was feeling something strange; an actual presence of a sun's ray piercing through the layers of clothing and enveloping me in a film; a butterfly shying away and drifting from end to the other and frozen when in sight of a certain person; a zing passing through the heart as though a phone is kept next to it and buzzing with divine messages.
On the brighter side, I seemed to have gained self–awareness considering I could physically feel the dark circles under my eyes from the lack of sleep.
Snatching my phone from the nightstand, I quickly called Savannah and gnawed on my lip as I waited for her to pick up the phone.
"Hello? Why are you calling me so early?" Savannah's voice came on hoarse with sleep.
I took a deep breath. "Sav, I think I–I like Jace."
A thud echoed from the other side and she cursed loudly. "Ow, ow, ow! What is going on? What is happening? Are we finally doing this?! Alyssa Dion!"
I cringed, holding the phone away from my ear. Savannah continued shouting on the other side some utter gibberish I couldn't even comprehend. And here I thought she was asleep.
"Will you calm down now?"
"Calm down?" She yelled back. "We are meeting for coffee right now and you will me everything."
"Okay, okay. I'll pick you up."
"Um, when I said right now, I meant at least half an hour later." And with that she hung up.
I hadn't even gotten a wink of sleep last night because I had spent the whole time overthinking everything. Nothing good came out of overthinking ever, and this very realization I had stumbled upon was a real trouble.
Yes, Shelley was a terrible person and did a lot of things that we let slide aside just because she was our friend, but if she got to know that I had developed feelings for Jace over time, she would just get another reason to trash–talk us.
This was such a disaster.
Since I didn't sleep, I had taken a long bath at five in the morning with a sea salt and driftwood bath bomb that I secretly took from my sister's bath bomb collection. Unfortunately, even the scent of the sea hadn't calmed down my anxiety in anyway. After spending a hour trying to logically dodge my feelings, I had to give up because my fingers began to look like shriveled up raisins.
Savannah and I always went to a coffee shop which I now knew was very, very close to Jace' house. I really didn't want to accidentally have a run–in with him, but then the odds of him coming to get coffee first thing in the morning were low. Besides I never saw him there before so I guess going there wouldn't put me in danger too much.
Besides I loved their coffee art way too much to not go there anymore.
I proceeded to slip on a cream-colored sweater and tucked it into a checkered skirt, and on second thoughts, grabbed my beach hat and sunglasses to hide both my dark circles and my identity in case a situation arose. By situation I meant if I ran into Jace by accident.
Inspecting myself in the mirror, I nodded.
"This will do." I said to my reflection.
By the time I picked up Savannah, it was already nine in the morning. She was waiting right at her front door which I only realized because as soon as I pulled up in her driveway, she threw herself out of the house as if the house was on fire.
When she came closer to the car, she flinched away. Okay, maybe I did after all look like a serial killer but was that important now?
"Why are you wearing a beach hat in autumn?"
I cleared my throat. "Don't ask."
I drove over to the coffee house all the while keeping an eye out for anyone who resembled like a six feet tall, brown haired being with an adorable smile. I quickly parked the car and got out before securing my façade.
"I feel embarrassed walking with you." Savannah muttered to me.
I elbowed her. "Hey!"
After ten minutes, we finally sat down in the corner most booth we could find. People were so judgmental today; they kept staring at me like I was a walking – talking fashion disaster.
I mean I probably was, but who were they to judge?
"So, you like Jace Crewe?" Savannah squealed loudly.
I hissed at her. "Don't say it... out loud."
"What? Why? I had been rooting for the both of you since the beginning."
"What do you mean?" I frowned.
She sipped on her coffee quickly before answering. "Well, I always had this suspicion that Jace has feelings for you," Seeing my blank stare, she threw her hands up, "oh, come on! You couldn't be that stupid to not think about how he readily agreed to go on a date with Shelley as soon as I mentioned you. And remember how he offered to walk you to your classes when you twisted your ankle? I mean no nice guy is that nice. Not to forget he went off on Shelley after she deliberately tried to hurt you at the carnival."
She did have a point, I hated to admit.
I let my head drop on the table and groaned. "But what would she think of my feelings towards Jace? I don't want her to think that I stole him or something."
"Look, first of all, he isn't an object that you'd steal so stop being stupid. To be honest, Shelley was the problem from the starting. She forced someone to like her then always insulted her friends' emotions and feelings. Do you really think she cared about us anyway apart from having someone to just be her 'squad'? What good would you do if you keep thinking about what she thinks of you?"
I knew what Savannah was saying was true, and if I wanted to let go of these doubts, I had to stop overthinking it.
"Okay, let's forget about all this." She leaned forward with a grin suddenly. "Hey, I heard Courtney's having a party this weekend. Should we go?"
"I mean we might as well."