After a treacherous day from hell, only from he point I saw Satan, I hadn't really come up with any new ideas for how I could scorch, murder, torture or drown him. I mean every thought was very much appealing but where can I get the tools?
Let's face it, I'd be a terrible, terrible murder and I'd get a bucket full of pointers from Jo, due to the fact I secretly think she's hiding dead bodies under her bed and buried in her garden. She's always tell me so, and she damn well knows how to get away with murder in more than one way possible.
Anyway, as soon as I got home from a dead beat llama grabbing a*s every 42 seconds and locking lips with MY FUTURE GIRL (haha I wish.) My mum gave me the news of, "You'll be sleeping at Curtis' tonight and Sunday since its bank holiday." Curtis happens to be my stepdads nephew, my sort of cousin and his mum is called Emma.
Now this news. I had total mixed feelings for, for the reasons of one) this is good because Jo literally lives closers to Curtis' house than mine and two) I'm allowed out much later round there than I am here which means three) more time to spend with Jo but four) I'm at Curtis'. With Curtis and his idiotic, flirty, fugly friends.
Life just couldn't go my way could it? To make matters even worse for me, since I just got in from being with Jo and tw*t face I refuse to associate with but like to assassinate, I had a maximum of what? Five minutes to get ready?
Aren't parents great with giving kids heads up for things? Like, I was one call away, how hard is it to call me and be like, "oh yeah we are dropping you off at Curtis' at six on the dot so you still got to get your sh*t together, don't stay out until last minute okay?" Seriously. But then if we do it or change plans god forbid even being alive. Double standards much.
I want to finds nice clothes to wear to actually look presentable for Jo this weekend because I know for definite she will come out, she likes to go out I know that for sure. I find a big grey shirt which had "Luke Hemmings is my boyfriend" is black bubbly writing wrote across it and I silently cursed it with my gayness.
Before Christmas I was obsessed with the band 'five seconds of summer' and my mother might have spent all my Christmas money on their merchandise because I was a little bit too obsessed. Not once had I mentioned I was straight though, then again I tried to come out a few months back but of course all I got in return for coming out was, "it's just a phase."
Thanks mum. I decide I'm ready enough and feel comfortable enough to admit to you I'm gay and you knock it off with the 'phase' thing. Mother of the year award.
I chuck a few other shirts and jeans, underwear and socks into my bag along with deodorant, some sprays, my toothbrush and other random things such as books. I run downstairs trying to fit in my self made work out, (obviously a joke) and hop into the back of the car with Phoenix. Paige wasn't ready yet, and my mum was waiting to lock the door.
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When we arrive I threw my things into Cameron, Curtis' one year younger but my god violent brother, and Curtis' room. My blowup air bed was there in the middle of the floor already, very inviting since all I fancied doing was sleeping to escape. But there's no such thing as sleeping in this house.
Give it two more hours and it will be acceptable to come upstairs. Just wait until eight and say you're off up to read in peace. That's the usual routine. Then two hours later Cameron and Curtis come up too and each play on PlayStation 3s together on GTA and I sleep to the noises of gunshots and civilians screaming.
So blissful...
And that's how the routine went that night, I use my reading excuse, secretly texting Jo and asking if she wants to go out the next day. She asks if we could meet Louis or he will get pissed because he asked to see her too so I reluctantly agreed dying inside because now it's so hard to get her alone and without him.
The next day at the start began slow, I am allowed out and have to be back for seven, for dinner, then am allowed back out again afterwards. I meet up with the gorgeous Jo who then meets up with the ugly Louis who liked to keep her to himself but today Jo protested against even looking like a couple in public or maybe she just felt bad for me?
The day was spent in town and down the seafront where, under the pier, Jo decided that instead she wanted to start smoking again for unexplainable reasons. She offers me a cigarette to which I persistently disagree too. I'd be sure to text her later begging her to stop, that it's bad for her and I just wanted her to be okay.
I go home for dinner at meet Jo round the corner where we walk together to multi court and burn some grass and she smokes more cigarettes. Still with Louis. Until hallelujah, he goes home. 30 minutes up the line Jo got a call saying she needs to be home now, strict parents and that and promises to message me once she got home. She leaves with a longer than normal hug that I thoroughly embrace, leaning my head on her shoulder and her squeezing before letting go.
That night, that's when everything changed my life. Jo had text me once she got home like she had promised too and somehow, I don't remember what brought the topic up, she begins opening up to me about her sexually. She tells me her parents despised gays and bisexuals and lesbian so she has never thought to even consider herself anything other than straight.
I ask if she wants to kiss girls, do things with girls and if she could see herself having a future with a girl. She tells me she has never kissed a girl so she doesn't know what it's like and that no girl would ever kiss her anyway so I saw my opportunity and I seized it before she could even change her mind. I offer in these exact words, "well I wouldn't mind kissing you if it helps you figure out your sexuality?" To which she replied in these exact words, "I'm up for that."
"Tomorrow?" I text back, my insides had gone to mush, I lost my breath. This wasn't a dream this was really happening... "Tomorrow." She messages back, straight away.
"Goodnight Jo x"
"Goodnight char x"
I put my phone down and couldn't hide the enormous smile that was snaking its way across my face. As if life could get better than this. It simply couldn't. Tomorrow. I want tomorrow to come sooner so I decide to sleep as soon as I could.
The last thing on my mind was Louis and how I had to convince Jo to dump him before this kiss because neither ones of us are cheaters.
But this was the girl of my literal real and unreal dreams and I wouldn't honestly do anything for her. I'd die for her, and lice for her. I'd be whatever she wanted me to be, do whatever she wanted to do, get her whatever she wanted me to get her, because as a matter of fact I'm in love with a girl.
That I could potentially, possibly, perhaps have a chance with.