Ficlet 1: Tom Misch - Man Like You (Patrick Watson Cover);
[ I knew a boy who was swallowed by the sky
By the flashing lights
I knew a man who got lost in the big dark blue
And came out alive
I knew a boy I knew a man that looked a lot like you ]
Singto hums gently to the music and let the calm tune of the guitar riffs and the soft stroke of the violin fills him in while he continues with his editing. He took a sip of his now lukewarm coffee, head bobbed gently, lips mouthing the lyrics as he sang under his breath.
This is him most of the time, alone in his favorite cafe.
He can be found working at this decent 'chic and modern' cafe conveniently called 'THE MODERN CAFE' for hours end, just a short drive of 20 minutes from his apartment complex. Truthfully he patrons the cafe mainly for the internet speed and because it is co-owned by a friend of his. It also helps that his firm has this so called 'flexi-hours' and 'working from home' policy.
Singto was deeply engrossed in his work, sitting cross legged by the knee at a four seater with this beautiful rustic round coffee table, that has friends called it as his 'office space', at the far end corner of the cafe. He was enjoying the very much needed peace and quiet to the sound of his favorite artist when suddenly he was pounced by none other than Krist Perawat.
There goes his alone time, for sure.
Krist initially came to the cafe for a package. His sister had ordered some artisan coffee grounds, she said and asked him to pick it up from the store and will come for it when she drop by the weekend at their parents house. That was 3 weeks ago, actually.
He shudders when he's reminded how his sister has threatened to cut him off and to forgo his request for that beautiful all black Adidas NMD that he desperately wants for his birthday. His sister can be savage when she wants to but he can't believe all that over some coffee grounds.
P'kard, the owner of the cafe laughed and clapped him at the back, "- its not a problem. I told your sis that i can have it hand delivered to her place but she insisted that you can pick it up-'' and that gets Krist attention.
He never even offer himself and if only she didn't threatened him for - but he knows why his sister did that, there's always been a reason why he spend most of his time at this cafe anyway and -
"He's at his 'office corner', if you want to know." P'Kern suddenly spoke behind the counter, interrupting his running thoughts. "-been there since we open this morning" he added.
P'Kern then pointed out to a lone figure, hunched over his laptop and in his signature all black outfit. Singto looks unmoved and unperturbed with his surrounding, his lips thinned and eyes fixed on the screen with one earphone on but Krist, is nothing but stubborn and relentless when it comes to Singto.
His lips curls upwards into a briefest of a smile, eyes colors in mischief as he made his way towards Singto before sitting unannounced and drops bodily into Singto.
Singto was just about to export his video when suddenly he find himself full of this obnoxious human being. Krist simply turns up out of nowhere, crowds him against the back cushion of the seat and is pressing against his side with arms tight around Singto shoulder.
In Singto head, Krist is the personification of chaos.
He even almost has Singto dropping his ipad on the floor and spills coffee on his macbook.
"Krist, too tight." Singto patted Krist arm gently, the younger man loosen his grip and shifts but only for him to have half of his upper body drapes against Singto chest so that he can make himself comfortable.
Singto rapped a knuckle on Krist head, affectionately of course "- can't you see that i am working." who beamed up at the older man and yes, it melts any resolve in him to push this 'heavy sack of potatoes' off. Singto resigned, softly murmured, " why are you such a child, Krist".
Krist ignores him with an unapologetic look before he whines into Singto shoulder, "I want to kill myself." "I think i am gonna fail this course." Krist added dramatically, purses his lips before declaring "Who fucking need supply chain management, anyways.".
Then, in a flurry of movement he suddenly moves before sinking into the seat next to Singto and screams into the back cushion. Krist can be excessive, sometimes.
Despite knowing this 'manchild' for almost 4 years, Singto still find himself falling for Krist antics, it's more of like babysitting your annoying but adorable younger brother, and he can't help making offhanded comment at Krist, "You said the same about the other test and you still aced the paper, Krist" before turning back his attention to the iPad.
Krist, predictably throws Singto a dirty look, "I studied three hours for that test, P' and that's more than i ever did for any other test", Krist cheekily adds with a wink and yes, that definitely earn him a slap to the head from Singto. But Krist wounds his arms around Singto stomach, instead.
Singto ended up huffing in frustration and continue with his editing, it's hopeless to deal with this overgrown puppy anyways. Not when Krist is latching on Singto as if he's a lifeline, as if his whole existence belongs to Krist. Given the impending deadline and there's no way he can fend him off, Singto caves in and let Krist has his way instead. He might as well ignores the triumph look that Krist throws him, too.
Krist has since then gone quiet. His face blank, completely preoccupied over something on his phone and even has his glasses on with the occasional scrolling of his thumb on the screen. This is him, a contrast to the so called brazen, friendly and sociable persona that he let on. Beneath all that, he's quiet and a private person with the brightest mind that Singto ever met.
Here, from where Singto sits, he sees Krist, looked at him for the first time in a week and let all the details fills him in. Singto notes on the gaunt and pale skin, red rimmed eyes, the nervous tick of his fingers and how worn out Krist look and ignores the familiar twinge in his chest. No, he won't go down that road again.
So, Singto nudge against Krist ribs and asked, "Anything interesting?". It's far more easier this way, drawing the lines between them. But then Krist lips curls into a small, gentle and soft smile, and oh, how it lights up his face as if thousand of suns rising from inside of him. He has this kind of dreamy smile, and Krist look wonderful like this, with bright eyes and the softness in his expression, and Singto can't help the stutter of his heart and how his breath catches, simply looking at this man.
There for a moment, a flash of tenderness flickers across Krist's eyes, as it wanders across Singto pleasant features before finally settling on his lips. And there it goes again, that crackle of something-something, some electrifying pull between them for the nth times and how terrifying they can easily fall back into that again when it's just too late for all that, now.
Krist was the first one to look away, this time. His smile turns into a grin, the playful one as he breaks into random conversation on the latest fads in the internet, how his faculty has a new cat resident that kept the student company during the exam season and even on his trip to Surabaya for a debate competition.
It's easier this way, to just talk, a pity excuse for defense and Krist has built a wall between them because there's no way he can survive another fall, again. That and how his heart behaves with Singto.
Once before, this gnawing and gaping hole in his chest used to be full of him. This for Krist, what he defined as the cruelest construction of torture, in the form of Singto Prachaya.
He ignores, and ignores and will just keep ignoring the look that Singto throws him.
He doesn't need that guilt, regretful look that Singto gives him.
Why should Singto be when it wasn't his fault to begin with?
It's almost 6.00 PM, the cafe finally quiet down for the day saves for the soft tunes from the stereo and muffled chatters from other patrons at the establishment. Singto continues humming under his breath. He took a sip what's left of his iced americano, nose flaring in frustration.
His macbook still hangs and it frustrates him when looking at how time consuming it is, he should've gotten himself a new machine weeks ago. But since it's too late to complain now, he might as well sits back and 'enjoy' the waiting.
Singto then took the time to go thru his phone, replies few messages and even send few emails before finally he sinks his head to the back cushion. He stretches his arms and that almost has Krist woken up from his sleep. Krist was fast asleep with his head in Singto's lap, naturally.
Singto smiles before running his fingers through Krist hair, taking comfort in the soft strands and the pleasant sounds that Krist makes. He tucks Krist dark brown hair behind his ears, and plays with the hairline at Krist's forehead absently, amused when Krist brows furrowed in confusion in his slumber.
Singto was about to tease Krist's nose when his phone vibrates with incoming call. Singto face lights up instantaneously when he saw the caller ID.
Singto smiles into the speaker, "Hello." and how his chest expands when Singto hears his voice, after a really long and exhaustive day staring at the computer screen.
"Sing, are you done with your work?" Na's voice fills the speaker, he sounds tired.
"Yeah, i am about done here." Singto explains. "I am just going through few details. Then I am sending it over.", fingers still playing with Krist hair absently.
"Finally, I take it we won't be sleeping with that machine again, tonight" Na jokes before laughing.
"P!! It was just one time." "Can you please stop teasing me. I was so tired and i didn't even realize that i had fallen asleep-" Singto answers softly, trying not to wakes Krist up.
Na cant help but smile to that, "Oh, i'm just going straight to the gym from the office. Meet me afterwards?" clicks his tongue and asks, "I saw Krist posted something on IG. He's still with you?"
Singto hums in agreement, and mumbles into the phone. "Yeah. I am taking him for sushi in a bit." " Then, I'll just wait for you at the coffee shop across the complex afterwards " he offered.
"If he's staying over, might as well use the guest room." Na said, deadpanned. Singto can hear the chimes from the elevator at the background.
"-not sure he'll be staying though."Singto answers, while stifling a yawn. "but P', in case you forgets -" he then adds, "what are you going to do with the boxes on the bed then?.
Feeling a little bit confused, "What boxes again? I thought i cleaned that out the other day" Na commented, feeling slightly defensive.
"it's from the new TV set and someone was excited for a new cabinet when we went to IKEA the other day" Singto teases him, instead.
Na finally remembering that he has procrastinated to clean up the guestroom, change the subject and quickly suggested, "Then he can sleep on the couch. He crashes there most of the time anyways."
"-remembers when he was cramping at our place for his so called killer papers last semester". Na reminded Singto, especially on the mess that Krist has made of their dining table with his papers and textbooks.
"No. You can't ask him to sleep on the couch." Singto said, quietly now.
"And nope, he's not sleeping with us" Singto quickly added.
"but dear, he's like an adult version of Vic, right" Na mused, lips curves into a wicked smile.
" P'Na!, did you just compare him to your 6 years old niece." Singto protested. "he's not that bad".
"He's attached to you that's for sure. Why don't you just adopt him" Na laughs again. He loves teasing Singto, and just talking him, even hearing his voice melts all his tiredness away.
Na gently hummed into the phone "Sing, I've reached the train station. I called you once i am done then." not forgetting to remind him of, "be careful when you're driving, later" before saying his his goodbye to Singto.
Singto did the same "Yeah. see you later. You be careful too, then" before he finally ended the call.
Singto looked down to his overgrown puppy, his expression darkened and forlorn as he continue studying Krist sleeping features, wishing that their circumstances were different, not in this perpetual state of mess and wretchedness and that they could be happier somehow. In that universe, Singto chooses Krist.
Krist finally waken up from his sleep to Singto long fingers massaging into his scalp, he looked up and saw that familiar sad smile curving at the corner of Singto lips.
"Hello." Singto finally said, his palm warm against Krist forehead as he pushes his hair back and Singto fought the urge to lean forward and kisses the sleep away from Krist eyes.
Krist smiles sleepily to him, "Can i just-." took Singto hand, and places it against his breastbone "Just 5 more minutes" Krist murmurs before burying his face into Singto stomach. Krist wanted to savour this moment, this very point in time that he can pretend Singto belongs to him as much as Krist is his.
But all he could do is to just swallows the sob, ignoring the tremble of Singto hand in his hair. Its undefinable how remorseful Singto is for both of them.
He's sorry for not kissing Krist at that one party 3 years ago, for Krist broken and bloodied knuckles from him hitting the wall when Singto told him that he's dating P'Na few months afterwards.
He's sorry for the hurt and ache that they kept causing each other, for this mess they're in, for all missed opportunities, and he's sorry for the plain gold bane decorating his right hand.
It will haunts Singto for sure, when he's reminded of the destroyed expression on Krist face when both P'Na and him announced of their engagement, weeks ago. But nothing, will ever comes remotely close to when he found Krist afterwards, chilled down to his bones from the storm at the front door of their apartment.
Singto remembers Na turning off the TV as he gently retires into their room while he pulls Krist into the spare room, locking the door behind him. Singto has sat Krist on the bed while he scurries off for towels and how terrifying and heart wrenching to find him looking so destroyed and hollowed as he dries off Krist's hair.
He remembers the tremble of Krist body as it quakes with unspoken grief and hurt, his red rimmed eyes shining and wet, "Why am i always too late? Always, always. Oh god, please P' i can't -", his muffled screams into Singto shoulder was frighteningly the loudest and excruciating. That for Singto, is the sound of a heartbreak.
Author's Note: Right, i didn't mean to hurt my poor kids that bad in this installment. I promise that the next one will be better and happy ending-ish, i guess.
As you probably know, there is a cameo by Singto new beau, Na Thanaboon from U-prince because i just adore him and he has the nicest smile ever. His chemistry with Singto in that 1 minute clip is to die for. But frets not, i wont be jumping ship this early on but he will definitely make an occasional appearance now and then.