"I LOVE HIM" I screamed at the top of lungs
"YOU HAD NO RIGHT TO MAKE THIS DECISION, THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU" I continued as the anger boiled inside of me.
~
I decided it was time to leave my room, it was time to face the rest of the guys.
I gently pushed my body up off of the bed. My body was weak from the lack of food and movement. I felt fragile. I sighed deeply as I slowly made my way to the door.
I can't spend the rest of my life in the room grieving. Waiting for Eddie to walk through the room and hold me in his arms. I know what he did was wrong but he's still my Eddie. He's still my Slyfox.
I turned the handle slowly, opening the door with a slight creek. I began to walk down the hall, slowly and steadily. Sometimes I stumbled but I guess that's normal seen as I've only left my bed to use the bathroom.
I made my way down the stairs carefully placing my feet on each step. I could hear the guys in the basement. They were laughing and shouting. The noise made me smile slightly. I haven't heard anyone's voice since Eddie left, since I shut everyone out.
The first few days everybody would try and talk to me. They would try and help me move on. But all I said is that Eddie wanted me to think, so that's what I'm doing. Soon after they would give up and leave. Now they don't even bother trying to communicate with me, thinking they'll get the same response.
Well I'm done thinking. It's been a week and if Eddie wants to leave me then fine. That's his decision. All I want to know is why. What did I do to deserve this, all of this?
I made my way down to the basement. Nobody heard me walking down the stairs. I entered the room to see them all sat on the couch playing mario party. James was screaming at Seamus for getting another star. Dan was laughing at them while Jordan was just about to take his turn.
I stood in the door way, trying not to disturb them. I smile crept along my face as I watched them start a new round.
James noticed me out of the corner of his eye. He turned to face me, a frown clearly showing on his face. I smiled at him and nodded, telling him to continue playing. His eyes lite up as he saw the happiness on my face.
"What to join us?" He asked causing everyone to turn around and face me. Everyone stared at me with surprise and shock.
"Nah dude, I'll wait till the next game" I said still smiling at them.
"We've only just started, we don't mind restarting" James continued causing Seamus to quickly turn to face him.
"You're only saying that because you're losing" He said laughing.
"Come on, let's start a new game so Aleks can join" Jordan interrupted as he stood up and walked over to the TV to pick up another wii remote.
"Come and sit down Aleks" Dan said, pointing to the seat next to him. I nodded and made my over to the guys.
I sat down in a place next to Dan. Jordan passed me the other wii remote and sat at the other side of me.
"Okay, it looks like we're starting a new game" Jordan said as he quit the current one.
~
It was a few hours later when we decided to go and get lunch. I forgot how much fun it was to play games with the guys. How it felt not to be on your own all day and night.
"Okay, I think we should let Aleks choose where we eat" Jordan said as he stood up off of the couch, stretching his arms.
"But we agreed to get subway this morning" James complained, turning off the wii console and TV.
"Lets just go to subway then" I said not wanting there to be and argument. Everybody nodded as we made our way to the kitchen.
Walking in to the kitchen I saw the little table. I saw Eddie sat there with his head laid on top, just like he had done the day he left. I close my eyes tight and shake my head. Your just imaging it Aleks, he's not there.
I opened my eyes to see I was right, he wasn't there. I continued to walk into the kitchen, I saw Seamus staring at me worriedly.
"What's up dude?" I asked him. He looked away quickly.
"Nothing, everything's fine" He replied.
I rolled my eyes. I know he's still worried about me. James sat at the table as Seamus grabbed his keys from the counter.
"So, who's going to go and get the food?" Seamus asked holding up the keys. I shrugged and leaned against the counter. I was now at the opposite the door on the other side of the room.
My eyes widened as I saw him again. I saw him walking towards the door. Why am I having these flash backs. I tilted my head forward, squeezing my eyes closed. For a minute I had forgotten about Eddie. I had forgotten about everything. I was having fun, enjoying myself. my eyes began to water and tears fell to my feet.
"Aleks, are you okay?" Dan asked. I nodded my head but my head was still faced down towards the floor. I can't let them see me cry. They'll think I'm still weak and vulnerable. They'll think I'm not ready to get back to my normal life.
"Yeah I'm fine" My voice was quiet and cracked slightly.
"Why don't Jordan and Dan get the food, we'll stay here" James said, obviously referring to me and Seamus.
I heard the footsteps start to walk towards the door. I heard the door open with a slight creek and close behind them. I kept my head down. I don't want to see him anymore. He left me. You have to get over him. He left you.
I felt a slight pressure on my shoulder.
"Aleks, it's okay" Seamus' voice was soft and quiet.
"Why did he leave?" I didn't even think before I asked. The words just blurted out.
"It's for the best Aleks" Seamus answered.
I looked up at him angry and confused.
"What do you mean?"
"It's for your own good"
I froze. It's for your own good. Those words. Those are the exact words Eddie said before he left.
"Why did he leave Seamus?" My voice was bitter. I saw James stand up out of the corner of my eye.
"Seamus, we should tell him" He said.
"Tell me what, what did you do?" My heart was beating rapidly as the anger inside me grew stronger.
"We did it to help you Aleks" Seamus said, quietly.
"DID WHAT? TELL ME WHAT YOU DID" I screamed. I was getting more and more impationate.
"We told Eddie to leave" James blurted out.
I felt my heart break as my chest began to ache.
There was a few minutes of silence as I tried to understand.
"Why would you do that?" My voice was quiet as tears threatened my eyes.
"We did it for you, we-" Seamus began to say but James interrupted him.
"Aleks, we did it to help you"
"I LOVE HIM" I screamed at the top of lungs
"YOU HAD NO RIGHT TO MAKE THIS DECISION, THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU" I continued as the anger boiled inside of me.
"Aleks please don't shout. It's for the best" Semus said surprisingly calm.
"FOR THE BEST. YOU THINK THAT MAKING THE ONE MAN I LOVE LEAVE IS FOR THE BEST" I stormed out of the kitchen up to my room. I heard footsteps behind me but soon stop. All I could hear was blood pumping through my ears.
I slammed my bedroom door behind me as I began to rummage through the items on my desk. As soon as I found my phone I clicked speed dial 1, which was Eddie's number. I haven't tried to get in contact with him. I thought he might try and call or text me so I've waited.
I pressed my phone up to ear, waiting to hear his memorizing voice once again.
"I'm sorry, but the number you are looking for no longer exists"
............... What?