———
He shot himself.
Everyone was stunned, utterly speechless, nobody even dared to make a move. For two hellish minutes, staring at the corpse; eyes still wide opened, flesh distorted while lying cold on the ground... was just too much to bear. The blood spilled over the floor, tracing the gaps between each tile, painting red all over the surface. Tumalsik pa ito kay Jung na nagkataong na sa malapit.
"Fucking shit!" Luckily, he was quick, it only stained his white shirt and an ample part of his lower cheek.
Lyca looked away, slightly clenching her chest. It was beating frantically, still unable to take in what just happened. Although she's a Reaper, where she handles dead people, deal with them or even talk with them in a daily basis. Hearing their thoughts of how much they wanted to keep living, breaks her heart. She sympathised them, because if she's in their position she'd do the same. She'd beg for her life too. She used to think, life is precious and it must be treasured but now after witnessing first hand how it only took a bullet to take that precious thing called life. Lyca felt bad. After all, life isn't.
As she did that, looking away to somehow make her feel better (though it did not). Lyca stiffen as she was drawn to a familiar figure standing outside. Although, she was meters away, a lot of factors may affect her sense of distinguishing; the messy surroundings, her blurry eyes badly wanted to drop a tear and her chaotic thoughts, yet she knew and she was certain.
It was Sadako, staring roughly at her. Completely vanished before even she could step forward.
--
"We're here," Doc Gab uttered slowly.
Napatango siya at bumaba sa kotse nito ngunit ramdam pa rin niya ang mga matang nakasunod. Sighing deep, Lyca faced Doc Gab. She gave him the warmest smile she could, but it didn't turn out the way she expected. She looked conflicted with a dull smile plastered on the face.
"A-are you okay?" Doc Gab slightly tapped her shoulders. It caught her attention and mindlessly utter 'what'.
Studying her face for quite a second, Doc Gab spoke. "You spaced out," he pointed out.
She did.
Her mind still lingered over several thoughts like the incident earlier, Judge (about to die but he didn't— thank God but someone else did) and Sadako. Lahat iyon naglalaro sa isipan niya. Nakakabaliw.
"Lyca," ramdam niyang may gusto pang sabihin si Doc Gab, kaya minabuti niyang manatili sa kinatatayuan para hintayin iyon. Ngunit umiling ito kaagad. "Nothing, you should rest."
Bagama't pagod ang katawan, hindi siya nakatatulog. Stayed awake for an or two, probably only got an hour of asleep, she was groggy when she woke up. Still, she got up. Wearing just plain tees, jeans and sneakers, dumeretso siya sa kusina kung saan nagluluto na ng almusal si Lola Dhalia.
"Oh Lyca!" she seemed startled. Parang hindi nito inaasahan na bababa siya agad. "Hindi ka ba magpapahinga ngayon?"
Umiling siya at dumapo ang mga mata niya sa mga dadalhin nito sa school ngayon. Madaming mga boxes ang naroroon. "Naku! Lyca ayos lang, may mga tauhan akong tutulong sa'kin ngayon." Lumapit ito sa kaniya at bahagyang hinimas ang balikat niya.
"Pahinga ka muna."
Lyca smiled, an assuring one. "I'm fine."
Inuna niya ang mga boxes para ilagay sa compartment ng kotse. Napakagulo roon kaya medyo natagalan siya para ayusin ang loob para hindi masira ang mga boxes.
"Lyca," she shifted her weight. It was Doc Gab in his usual dress shirt, sleeves folded halfway his arm, some gray slacks and loafers, probably going to work already. Sa likod lamang nito naroon ang isang babae. Hindi siya pamilyar dito. But somehow some of her features do rang a bell
"Sandra come here!" The woman pulled Sandra. Nakayuko ito habang karga-karga si Sunny sa braso.
--
Ramdam ni Lyca ang mabibigat na hininga, ang kaunting galaw nito, ang bahagyang pagsinghot at ang tuluyang pagtakip sa mukha para umiyak. Hindi alam kung anong gagawin, minabuti niyang manatiling tahimik sa tabi nito, habang nakatanaw kay Sandra sa hindi kalayuan na masayang nakikipaghabulan kay Sunny.
"Hindi naman ganito si Sandra noon. She used to be very cheerful, lively and very bright." Selene— Sandra's mother, beautiful in her early 40s, probably an inch taller than her, pair of dark black eyes just like Sandra's and soft calm voice while eyes still bore on her kid playing carefree and lively underneath the scorching sun.
Selene stayed silent for awhile, feeling the warm breeze against her skin, sighing delve deep she started speaking again. "After her sister died— Sandi my oldest died from a car crash. My Sandra spent a year not talking to anyone. Nakatulala lamang ito, ni ayaw kumibo. Luckily, months of treatment she recovered but look at her. Her smiles, her laugh, her eyes... It's d-different. Sandra started acting strange. Madalas nakikipag-away sa mga kaklase niya, kapag nagtatanong ako hindi siya nagsasalita."
It must be very hard. Selene's a single parent. Raising Sandra on her own while grieving for the death of her other daughter at the same time was a different kind of pain. It must've hurt so bad.
"I'm not justifying Sandra's actions but as a parent I feel like a failure for raising my child badly. Probably partly it's my fault. I'm really s-sorry."
Sa tingin ni Lyca alam niya ang gustong ipahiwatig ni Selene. Napansin niya rin ito kay Sandra noon. Bagama't maingay at palaban ang mukha nito ngunit ang kaniyang mga mata ay nagpapahiwatig ng iba. Sandra's eyes seemed dull and lost.
When Sandra caught her standing near her, the younger stopped abruptly. Standing quickly almost stumble upon the sudden movement, luckily Lyca caught her first before she fell.
"Careful," Lyca said. Sandra stayed still and mute, she looked uneasy, she couldn't even meet her eyes.
"Ice cream?" Iniabot niya ang dalawang tube ng ice cream. Isang Cookies and Cream at Chocolate. "Anong gusto mo?"
Lyca lent her the Cookies and Cream but Sandra shook her head, she gave her the Chocolate flavor instead, still she did the same the tiny beads on her hair clips did some noise as she shook her head.
Bumuntong hininga si Lyca at kapwa binigay ang dalawa kay Sandra. Ngumiti ito, at masayang kinuha ang dalawang tubes ng ice cream. Ngunit tumigil ito sa kalagitnaan ng pagkain. Sandra handed her the Chocolate flavored ice cream.
"I don't like Chocolates," she paused a bit and scooped some ice cream.
Although confused and surprised at the same time, Lyca smiled and reached the ice cream.
"Chocolates look like poop."
"Sandra!" she coughed. Nabulunan pa ata siya. "Pero nagpabali ka sakin ng Snickers sa Seven Eleven. You seemed to love it. You were eating well."
Sandra looked away, grim eyes, lips twisted while slightly biting the insides of her cheeks. "I only eat Chocolates because Sandi likes it."
Napatikhim siya.
"D-do you miss her?" Sandra didn't answer, instead she scooped a spoonful of ice cream from her. "Sweet poop!" Sandra snickered, but the grim and the sudden jolt of pain never left her eyes.
Lyca's smile cracked. They say you could lie with your mouth but not with your eyes. With that said, she knew,
Sandra misses her sister.
The next morning Lola Dhalia was busy as usual. The older was up with her daily activities, prepare her stuff, the food, her things and many more things a woman entreprenuer does every morning.
Nauna siyang lumabas habang buhat-buhat sa magkabilang bisig ang mga dala ni Lola Dhalia. Kinuha naman ito agad ni Doc Gab ng matanaw galing sa kotse.
It was sunny outside, the early morning sun was unexpectedly strong and her sweater top (kinda dumb to wear that today) was starting to stick to her back. She felt sticky!
"Panget!" Sandra the brat that she is, even stuck her tongue out when Lyca tilted her head to face Sandra. The younger was wearing a white blouse bottomed with plaid skirt.
"Look, I'm going to school!" She even spun, it emphasized how cute her skirt was on her.
"You look pretty Sandra!" Napalakpak pa siya dahil sa tuwa.
"Of course!" lumikot ang mata nito. "Sige na nga... Maganda ka na rin! But I'm prettier!" Dagdag pa nito. Umalis din agad si Sandra nang tawagin ni Selene. Naiwan siya roon sa labas habang hinihintay sina Doc Gab na lumabas.
No, she wasn't completely alone. A couple of meters away, under the giant old tree, eyes staring from afar, a figure that always been familiar to her.
"Sadako!" Sigaw niya, mabilis ang mga hakbang.
She wasn't expecting anything but surprisingly she did... find her. Sadako in her back, where her hair swayed slowly against the gentle outdoor wind. It took awhile before she shifted her weight and faced her a bit.
So this is how longing for someone felt like. It doesn't feel good. It's sad.
"Do you miss her?"
--
Lyca was trailing the busy hallway, swarming with students taking their lunch breaks, probably on their way to add population to the already congested canteen. Kaya Naisipan niyang doon kumain sa may field. It's kinda peaceful there during noon breaks.
As expected her day started very busy. She skipped her breaks and barely took a seat to rest. They are out of people. Absent ang ibang kasama niya kaya nahati sa kanila
ni Lola Millie ang trabaho ng dalawang liban. Nagpupunas siya ng mga lamesa at nag-aayos ng mga gamit sa paligid nang tawagin siya ni Lola Dhalia para magpahinga at para kumain na.
It was, indeed peaceful there. The football field, warm breeze, all the greens and stuff was soothing in her eyes. Gustuhin man niya ay hindi siya nagtagal doon, hindi pa tapos ang lunch break ay nagsimula na siyang maglakad pabalik sa canteen.
Abruptly she stopped.
The hallway was now pretty quiet, students may have ascended to the canteen already. Through the ajar door; the sound of the voices, the melody of the song, the gentle tap as its background made her turn around and stood there completely.
She didn't even need to look twice to not recognise the four lads in their school uniforms; Judge's long brown hair swayed slowly as he brushed it through his fingers, contrast to Jeru's screaming red hair, ears pierced and lips smirking a bit. There's Jon, innocently looking Jon just like the first time she saw him slumped on the ground. She maybe startled and confused, but ironically, there's Jung, standing just beside Judge, wearing a black hoodie over his uniform.
Judge, Jeru, Jon, Jung.
They were having fun, singing, laughing. Lyca couldn't help but to lift the corners of her lips, they were just fun to look at. Somehow, they look like good friends. Unconciously, she saw herself pressing her hands together, eyes bright, smile wide as the boys finished the song.
###