"I'm telling you, girl, he was just all types of weird." I shuddered a little to be even mentioning Derek again. It had already been 2 months since that dinner and I had been seeing him around everywhere I went now. I didn't tell Dallas, he was already still so unraveled about it and I didn't want him to think I felt uncomfortable about his family all of a sudden. I would go over to their house every weekend now, even just call his mother on be phone to see how she was doing. She didn't have many females around the house to talk to and I knew she was dying of boredom of Omar and Dallas weren't at the house with her.
"Wait, what do you mean by weird? He can't be that bad, the rest of D's family seems so cool!" We sat on the deep red tartan track and began to stretch before we ran. I squatted down into froggy style and looked around as if someone was watching us before I spoke.
"I don't know, he was looking at me like he just wanted to lick on every part of me. Plus, I've been seeing him around all the time now! It's just a creepy feeling!" I spoke quietly and quickly.
Jenny laughed, "Lick every part of you? You doing porn now?" She shook her head and stood up. "Sara, stop sweatin' about this guy. Dallas got your back, that's not gonna change just 'cause it's his weird ass brother this time." She put her hand on my shoulder and tried to relax me. I looked up at her in time to see her smiling down at me, she made me feel a little better about the situation. While we ran I let other things cross my mind so that I wouldn't be so jumpy anymore. I loved when the warm air hit me and blew through my lungs. Even though I had a major dance performance coming up tonight I still couldn't completely shake the thought of someone watching me lately.
I couldn't remember ever being this angry with Dallas before tonight. He had already blew me off about 5 times just this month and now he was saying he couldn't come to my performance. I slumped down on my bed wondering if I was making a bigger deal out of it than I should have been but I couldn't hide my feelings, I was truly angry and hurt. I didn't know why he had become so distant lately because he definitely wasn't talking to me about any of it. I would be on stage in less than 2 hours and my emotions were an absolute mess. I even asked if I could at least call him before I went on but he said he was out handling something and wouldn't be done until later on.
I paced back and forth backstage, how was I supposed to do my performance now that I knew Dallas wouldn't be in the audience? I tried to shake my nerves. I wanted to drink water so my throat wouldn't be too dry, but I couldn't drink too much or else I would feel bloated on stage. I wanted to hear one of my favorite songs so I could relax myself, but I didn't want to distract myself from my original routine. I sat in the nearest chair and buried my face in my hands.
"You've been doing this before him, you can do this after him..." I whispered to myself realizing I was the only coach I had right now. Peeking from behind the curtain, I saw my mom, Bernie, Jenny and Aidan were all in the audience looking more excited than they had in a while. I walked over to my locker in the far right corner of the room and took my black skirt off of the hanger. I pulled it over my body and let it fall around my waist, feeling all of my stress and anxiety melt away from me as if it were a cape. I took 3 giant breaths and glanced at the full length mirror one more time. I heard the music start up as my teacher walked in, beaming and lightly walking over to me.
"You ready, girl!?" She had one of the biggest smiles I had ever seen but knowing her for almost 12 years now, I knew she was just as human as the rest of us. Smiled a big game but her life wasn't perfect. I was going to tell her about how Dallas wasn't going to be watching my first performance since we started dating but I didn't even want to start thinking about it all over again. I had been trying not to hold grudges against the people I cared for anymore and I know if I let all the anger back inside of me I would mess up on stage. I thought back to all of the times my father would come and annoy the rest of the audience by standing in the walkway in the auditorium and videotape every single performance I had. I exhaled one more time and looked back at her.
"I'm ready!"
I ran over to my mom as soon as she walked into the locker room and hugged her as tight as I could. I was so excited after over a year of performing at all I had won first place tonight. I had flashbacks of all of my losses and victories when I was a little girl, running up to my parents either trying to hide a huge smile or a face full of tears. A part of me still wanted to cry, I wish everyone in my life could have seen me do so well after so long. This night was the first step in a huge confidence boost for me in my life.
"Do you want to go get something to eat, baby girl? You deserve it." Bernie patted my shoulder and bent down to kiss my forehead, I could tell he was just as proud of me as anyone else who saw.
"Any other time, I would have but I just feel really exhausted tonight, I'm not sure why. Maybe, I've been running around too much lately." I still couldn't shake the weird feeling from earlier. We stayed in the room and talked for another 15 minutes before I heard a faint ringtone in the corner of the room. When I answered it was Jenny screaming about how happy she was for me and how excited I made her feel being back on stage again. I heard Aidan say congratulations in the background as well and I couldn't help but laugh at them. As soon as I hung up the phone 3 loud knocks echoed around the room. Bernie jumped up to get the door before my mother or I could walk over. My heart dropped when Dallas walked into the room biting his lip and carrying a large bouquet of lilies, my favorite flower in the world. The entire room was silent until my mother and Bernie stood up and said they would see me back at the house. My mom walked over to me and hugged me tightly again before kissing my forehead. Dallas waited for them to leave the room before beginning to speak.
"I saw it." He tried to lightly smile at me, but I didn't return it. I was too hurt and confused to even understand what he meant. He walked toward me but I put my hand up toward him, I knew tears were coming to my eyes but I did everything I could to keep them from falling. He didn't stop walking forward but it only made me angrier when he touched me.
"No! You haven't been there for me. I wanted you here of all people and you weren't. You haven't been for weeks now! I can't believe I was stupid enough—." Before I could finish my sentence he held me tighter and closer regardless of my pushing and squirming to get away from there. I calmed down after a couple of minutes enough to hear him whisper "I was there, I saw the whole thing" in my ear. I stepped back and stared at him, my eyes were already wet and red from crying. He leaned in to kiss my lips and congratulate me on my victory again.
"I really didn't even think you could dance all like that!" We walked hand and hand down the dark street. It felt chillier than usual, especially being in the middle of spring. I shivered and pulled closer to Dallas' arm. All I could do was smile and thank him for the compliments. I was just glad that he actually came and saw me dance. After walking for about 15 minutes I began to shake the creepy feeling I had all week until I looked up at Dallas and could tell his mind was suddenly elsewhere. His jaw would tense up and he moved his arm around my shoulder like he saw something I couldn't.
"What's wrong, babe?" I started to worry myself when he wouldn't answer me. I hadn't even noticed that the street we were on had become extremely empty except for a few people standing on their stoops before heading in for the night.
"Yo, D!" we both turned at the same time when we heard someone call to him from behind us. I couldn't make out who it was, but Dallas grabbed my arm and started running with me. I had to move my legs faster to keep up with his pace. We turned down the nearest street and into a narrow alleyway with a large opening for trash collectors at the end of it. Dallas pushed me into one of the crawlspaces between 2 large dumpsters and started to take off his coat.
"Do not come out until I come and get you." He put his coat around my shoulders and grabbed my face, "You hear me?" All I heard was his muffled demands, I couldn't see him clearly anymore because I had started crying again. I didn't have any idea what was going on, I couldn't pull myself together. The bad feeling had returned to my heart and stomach, I wanted him to come hide with me but I couldn't choke the words out. I held onto his arms in attempt for him to read my mind but he broke free of my grasp when he heard his name being called again. I covered my mouth as hard as I could so whoever was chasing us couldn't hear me sobbing.
"Where's your bitch, D?" The voice seemed so familiar but I couldn't believe it was who I thought. I closed my eyes and took 5 deep breaths in attempt to calm myself. I stated to panic again when I heard the sounds of fighting but there were way more than 2 voices. I peeked out of from the trash can and threw myself back against the wall when I saw Derek wrestling with Dallas. There were about 3 other guys standing around them. I never got to know Derek but I knew it wouldn't stop with some stupid fight in a back alley. Dallas could handle himself in a fight, but against 4 guys? When I peeked out again, I saw Dallas on the floor before Derek kicked him in his already bruised ribs. I tried to think quickly about how to get the both of us out of this situation but panic rose in my heart again when I saw one of the other boys pull a knife out of his back pocket. He handed it to Derek and I knew I couldn't watch what they were planning next without doing something. I hurried to pull myself off of the ground and waited until all 4 of them were looking away to make my move. I ran toward Derek as soon as he started to bend down over Dallas' body. I pushed his body over and threw myself over Dallas.
"He is your brother!" I finally managed to choke something out and spat at him in disgust. Derek bent down above me and grabbed my shirt collar to pull me up. He slammed me against the hard brick on one of the buildings. I could feel the wet, warm blood trickled down the back of my neck. I couldn't free myself from his grasp but managed to peek over to see if Dallas was okay. I started to cry again seeing his lifeless body on the ground, while I brought my right fist up to hit Derek in the face. He let go of my collar to tend to his eye while one of his boys grabbed before I fell to the ground again. I slammed my fists on his chest trying to get him to let go of me. I felt someone grab me from behind and throw me into the wall again.
"You're such a stupid bitch. I could tell from the moment I saw you!" He yelled and kicked at the same time as I felt the pain shoot through my body. I cried out in pain and leaned against the wall again. I held onto my waist and could see blood seeping through my fingers. Derek turned around again as soon as he thought I wouldn't be an issue anymore but I couldn't let anything happen to Dallas, he was always there to protect me and I needed to do the same. I saw someone from the parking lot walk toward the alley and pull out their phone. I knew I needed to buy a little bit more time hoping the police would be coming sooner than later. I slowly stood up again and threw myself on Derek's back. "What the fuck!" He cried out in frustration before throwing me off of his back and running over to me. The last thing I heard were sirens in the distance before everything around me became dark.