Yeah so I'm actually not dead, just letting you all know. I don't think anyone would care though lmao
Let's just talk about Christmas for a bit
Honestly I'm somewhat excited to see what I get. But it's mainly gonna be a bunch of clothes. I don't need clothes though.
Maybe some more black leggings but if there's jeans, burn them please. I don't like jeans at all. They make me feel uncomfortable.
But what I'm really excited for is that I might be getting a 3DS because I neeeeeeed one. I'm done with this 2ds crap. It's stupid. Like...it doesn't even bend. Like I get that it's supposed to look...2D but that's impossible. I only wanted it because I thought with the 3DS I might accidentally turn on the 3D mode because I'm always flickering with buttons (also I didn't know it wasn't able to bend at the time. Thanks 5th grade me. Blind as ever)
But enough talking about what I want for Christmas because that's not important at all. Hahaha
I got a couple people presents for Christmas. Honestly, it's been really busy this year and the days that I was planning on going to the mall and buying stuff for people...it just got delayed. Just a bit.
So typical be is doing stuff last minute.
Can I get an applause for that?
Thank you
Unfortunately, I've also been procrastinating on wrapping presents...well bagging them. I can't wrap presents :/
And I call myself an artist1!1!!1!-!-
HahahahahahHhHhahhaah
But let's be real for a minute.
I've been procrastinating for multiple reasons. Sometimes I'll just sit there and debate whether or not if I should give some people presents. Sometimes people can be complete jerks towards me and that'll change my mind
But in the end, I'm giving everyone a present. Something very special that speaks to them.
I'm just to good-hearted. I hate leaving people feeling excluded. It's not a good feeling at all and to see everyone else suffer then...that makes me guilty.
But honestly I doubt people will ever respect my presents. They'll just be like "thank you!" then go home and either throw it away or just keep it in the back of their closets or somewhere out of sight so they don't think about me because I'm a fucking asshole
Oops sorry...language
You know what....I don't care anymore
Freedom of speech
Excuse my language though....
I'm also writing everyone little cards
And in those cards will basically say "oh thanks for being my friend and all"
Aaaaannndddd boom I'll write how I truly feel about them
And no matter how bad someone treated me, or hurt me, or made me want to end my life...
I'm still going to say something thoughtful and caring.
I'll tell them how much I appreciate them for being my friend
For staying with me no matter how much bullshit I might throw at them because I'm just an asshole sometimes.
Some people I want to say something more.
I want to take it a step beyond
But...
I can't
That's something I'm not eligible to do
I suck at expressing my inner feelings.
I suck at apologizing sometimes
Most of the time I'll mutter, which shows how sorry I am.
Other times I'll just immediately apologize like Tohru
Ew I know right??
Like the other day I stepped on some kid's foot and I just screamed in class "AHHH IM SO SORRY!!!!"
Like wtf nicoletta. You're in class. It's not like you broke someone's toenail by stepping on their foot before.
Hahahahahahha
Hahahaha
Hahah
Haha
Ha
....ha
.........whoops
*sigh* sometimes...I just sit there and wonder "hmm do people talk about me behind my back?"
Oh boy the answer is yes!1!1!1!
Well...I don't have any evidence, but I just know. I just have a strong feeling about it. I mean...who wouldn't?? I'm a fucking asshole who always fucking messes up with everyone.
I end up hurting people
I make them upset
And I can tell that by their atmosphere around me
People will be so happy around their friends and when I come, they look...depressed???
I don't know how to describe it but let's just say everyone hates me
...no matter what I do
You know what....
Just tell me my flaws. Just tell me if I upset you throughout the day
It's not gonna bother me
I don't care if you have to swear and list everything about me that pisses you off. Just go ahead. I don't care.
Not saying anything to me is worse than saying something. It's best to face your problems, not keep them bottled up inside. It's not good. That's why some people might be moody all the time. There's something deep down inside that's bothering them and they're too afraid to admit it.
Just say the truth
That's always the right approach
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year
Happy Hanukkah
Happy Kwanza
Happy anything
I'll probably talk to you all next year.
Thank you everyone for a much better year.
-Nicoletta
Also AnimeQueenJess , use this pic as your background. Sorry that it's been over 2 weeks. I've been busy every day and I haven't been on wattpad for a bit
My internet friend made it. I wish she had a wattpad though