•right now I'm in a state of mind•
She woke up, crying as she had done these days, as she was still choked up over him. She wiped her tears away, holding her pillow tightly against her wet eyes as she sobbed softly.
Tears were streaming down now, even as she tried to stop, but she couldn't. She couldn't stop thinking about that night, that night where they were dancing under the pale moonlight, waltzing away through the waves of the silvery stars, dazzling diamonds pouring against their beaming faces, her blue eyes grinning at his brilliant brown ones, her red curls drizzling onto her tanned shoulders, matching the ruby, sequined gown she had been wearing and the red lipstick glazing her lips, red lipstick like a blood fire, like the pool of crimson splattered all over the bumpy, blackened street, spiraling down like a cherry drizzle on cool ice cream, except it was his thick red blood on the icy black road, as he lay there silently after the rapid whoosh from the cursed demon flew past them, after committing the crime for the pleased Grim Reaper seeing their happiness being taken away from the both of them.
He was dead now, the magnificent moment of that night instantly fading away once he was struck dead from the speeding car, drunkenly murdering the only love in her life. And the magic between them...it was gone and now only pure horror for he had died to protect her and was no longer with her. No longer here, no longer sleeping beside her, twirling her red locks, bringing her head to his chest, soothing her back to sleep.
He was gone. And internally, she knew that so was she.
•i wanna be in like all the time•
She was sipping stale coffee, sitting silently on the stool at the kitchen table, flipping through the newspaper. Her eyes wandered back to her cell phone, seeing the countless messages and missed calls she had received these past few days, that she had refused to answer for her heart couldn't handle any more pain. She couldn't handle any of it. At all. Couldn't be a sponge to soak up more anguish than the anchor of agony holding her down.
She drank the last drop of the burnt brown liquid, leaving her stained mug on the table, as she walked over to the couch. Her dogs had been resting peacefully, as if not noticing what she was going through, as she kissed the tops of their heads, smiling through her tears.
The door bell rang rather loudly, all of a sudden, trilling through her ears louder than her screams and cries as he hissed in pain that he loved her and that she had to move on. She shook her head, moving to the door, as her fingers fumbled to open it.
It was Jenna. His ex-fiancé and one of her closest friends.
"Sharna...I'm," she began, her eyes red as if she had been crying herself, as she brought the redhead into a hug, both trying not to sob on the other.
"I..." she croaked herself as she wiped her tears once again, allowing Jenna to come in. Without a word, yet with every emotion burning through their hearts, they sat down together on the couch as she turned on the TV, the blinding colors of the screen flashing through their vision. In headlines and all caps, the death of their lover was announced, Val Chmerkovskiy Dead, vivid against the blurred words.
And they both began bawling at the sight, hugging each other and weeping at the sight of the man they loved dead. Together they cried and together they remained until darkness fell and the brunette had to leave. And silence swarmed the house once again as she sipped away her tea, silent sobs escaping her- a time she would never yearn to experience again.
•ain't got no tears left to cry•
Her eyes were bloodshot and dry now. She couldn't cry anymore, as if her body had run out of tears even as her heart continued to ache. Maybe her heart was trying to tell her to move on, just like he had wished her to do that night, that she would remember him but continue her life, knowing that one day, they'd meet again for their love was too strong to fade from simply death. She had tried to listen, but she was too blind and deaf to his wishes for she was selfish and didn't want him to leave her. She didn't want him to be taken from her, her heart claiming his soul even as it was the world that truly had him to themselves and not simply her.
She HAD to move on.
Or else she'd drown in her devastation. And knowing him, he'd be disappointed in her, if she was.
So she had to do what he wanted. To move on. To live her life even if his was cut short. For as he said, his last breath as she held his face close to hers, crying and kissing him, "you ain't got no tears left to cry, Sharna. Since we share a heart and I will continue to live through you. Please move on, my Love."
He was right. She ain't got no tears left to cry anymore.