Chapter song: The Night We Met by Lord Huron
RYAN AND Henry got situated in the front seats of his car. Pulling the keys out of his right front pocket, Henry put them in the ignition.
He watched the younger girl shiver from the morning weather, so Henry made sure to crank up the heat. While pulling out of his driveway, all of the conversations that had once been between them had vanished.
The small town of Derry Maine was finally starting to wake up. Tiny shops were opening their doors, and the smell of freshly brewed coffee and warm food followed. Henry twisted to the girl in the passenger seat.
"You're quiet, what are you thinkin' about?" Henry murmured as he took a left turn.
"Richie," Her voice monotoned, leaving her one word answer drifting in the silent air.
Ryan had reached what she thought was her lowest point. She didn't know how to feel anymore. Waves of sadness didn't even phase her anymore. The overwhelming oceans of numbness blocked out any true emotions.
"Oh.." Henry managed to breathe out after a moment of still looking at her.
Leaving one steady hand one the steering wheel, Henry's right hand drifted to Ryan's knee cap. His thumb slowly rubbing small circles around it, hoping to calm her nerves. But she sat still, looking out of the window. Her face showing no emotion.
"Hey, it's goin' to be okay. He's gunna make it Ry," Henry murmured out, giving her a grin. He got a small weak smile in return and she turned her head to face the window once again.
Driving straight on to Pine lane, Henry realized something.
He didn't know if Richie was going be okay or not. Henry didn't know if he was strong enough to make it through this amount of physical trauma. He clearly didn't want to lie to Ryan, but Henry don't know what would happen. He was hoping for the best. Henry didn't know Richie that well, and over the years he hadn't been the nicest to the boy either. But he wanted Ryan to be happy again.
Getting lost in his thoughts, Henry realized that he had missed the turn into the hospital parking lot.
"Shit, uh sorry," Henry whispered out, pulling the gear shift into reverse.
"You're quiet, what are ya thinkin about?" Ryan finally spoke out again after the ten minutes of driving, quoting Henry.
"Richie," He answered honestly.
Finally, they made it to the parking lot. It was littered with very few cars, so finding parking wasn't that hard. He turned the keys, shutting the car off in the process.
"Come on," Henry said quietly and opened the car door.
They walk close by each other through the empty, sad hallway of the hospital. Practically hand in hand. Henry and Ryan reached the front desk in no time, getting the attention of a young female nurse.
"Oh! Hello how can I help you today?" She asked with a fake cheery smile. Fake to the point she knew it was fake too.
"Um can we see a patient?" Henry mumbled out, looking down at Ryan. Her arms were crossed slightly, and her left leg was slightly bouncing up and down. Nervous.
Henry placed his hand protectively on her back, and gave the nurse a small smile.
"Of course, patients name?" The blonde girl smiled out, leaning on the counter towards them.
"Um Richie Tozier," Henry heard Ryan's weak voice breathed out.
"Ah yes, Mr. Tozier. He has finally woken up!" The nurse grinned out and slid a slip of paper over to Ryan.
Henry had never seen that girl's face light up so fast. Ryan's frown was replaced with a toothy grin, showing off that tooth gap of hers. She uncrossed her arms and now they were slightly in the air.
"Really??" She squeaked out, jumping a tad. She never thought she would hear those words spoken. The moment was surreal to Ryan. She didn't know how to process the news.
"Yup," The nurse smiled and turned back to her desk work.
Ryan opened the slip of paper, in bold red pen was written,
Tozier: room 217
Ryan crumbled the paper, stuffing it into her pocket. She knew his room number by heart.
"Lets gooo!" Ryan's voice filled with excitement as she grabbed ahold of Henry's wrist, dragging him to the room.
"Woah!" Henry muttered out, amazed at her strength.
They arrived at the room, and Ryan took no time entering. Henry's eyes first saw all of the plastic chairs clustered in the corner by the window. Most likely from the group yesterday. Then they landed on the fragile boy, propped up with a few pillows.
"Oh my god Richie!" Ryan's voice yelled out, running over to him.
"Hey Princess," Richie's voice was horse, leaving cracks here and there.
"Oh my- don't ever do that ever again!" She whined while hitting his upper arm.
Henry saw as tears threaten to pour out of Ryan's eyes. He knew she was trying her best to keep them in.
"I'm sorry baby," Richie muttered barely above a whisper. His smile was only slightly there, almost like he was faking it.
"Hey," Henry mumbled out, slightly waving. The action was the definition of awkward.
"Uh hi?" He spoke out, looking at Henry.
"Are you okay?" Henry asked, and Richie looked at him with the saddest of eyes. Knowing Henry had caught on to something.
Ryan twisted to face Henry and Richie, sending him a confused look.
"Um yeah I'm fine," Richie sighed, but Henry seemed to see through his lie.
"Richie....." Ryan said clearly worried, her voice carried on. "You're lying!" she squeaked out, standing from the bed.
"I-I'm not!" Richie's voice cracked, and a glossiness took over his brown eyes.
"Richie, we don't lie to each other, not anymore! Now what is happening?" Ryan commanded, yet her voice was still soft.
"Doc says I've lost a lot of blood, it's a miracle that I'm even awake right now..." Richie's words traveled on. "They gave me some news this morning."
"Get to the point," Henry stepped in, again placing a hand on Ryan's back. Rubbing small circles.
"They say there's no way I'm getting better! Ryan I cut too deep. I can't eat without puking and I'm too sick for them to tube me," Richie's voice broke away. He looked away from the young girl sitting in front of him.
"Richie... what are you saying?" Ryan sniffed, knowing where this may lead to.
"They need me to say my goodbyes, and you're the last one I need to make," His voice barely audible, and she grabbed his hand within moments of those words left his mouth.
"No! I-I can't just let you go Richie. I just got you! You were the best that ever happened to me- you are the best thing. I love you!" Ryan rambled, letting salty warm water droplets fall from her eyes.
"Baby, if you love me, you'll let me go."
Ryan began to sob, her shoulders bounced with every little cry. Henry watched as Richie brought her into his warm embrace. Henry sat on the edge of the bed with them.
Ryan was in Richie's arms, but her back was against his chest. So when Henry reached out his hand, he could touch Ryan's arm.
"Richie I love you," Ryan murmured, and snuggled even more into his chest.
"You know what that means baby girl?" He breathed out.
Ryan nodded weakly, but her mouth wouldn't say the words. More tears trickled down her face as she cried.
"I have to let go," Ryan sobbed and grabbed ahold of his hand, intertwining their fingers.
"Good," Richie said, an overall sadness filled his tone, "I love you too."
"When?" She asked, staring at Henry after a few minutes of quietness.
"Soon," Richie mumbled out, pressing a kiss to her temple.
"When?" Ryan asked again, slightly raising her voice.
"In the next 10 minutes..." Richie whispered.
"Oh god!" Ryan cried. Henry leaned forward and wiped away her tears.
"Darling know that I'm sorry and I love you," Richie spoke out with sorrow in his voice.
—
They stayed in this position for a while, just staying in each other's arms. By the way Ryan held on to the boy, Henry knew she wanted to hold on forever.
The door to the small room opened, and a tall male doctor walked in.
"Hello there, uh Mr. Tozier are you ready?" He spoke out loudly, his voice boomed across the four walls.
"Just a moment," Richie said and faced Ryan. She was shaking her head violently, tears uncontrollably falling past her eyes. She clung onto his hand tighter than before.
"Ryan Nicole Jones, the girl I've been in love with ever since I layed eyes on her," Richie watched her cry as he spoke
"I'll never stop loving her. Never. And I know that she still needs me and I know that I'll always need her. But one day she'll move on. That's okay with me. One day she won't love me the way she loves me now. I'm thankful for the time that I got to love her. The love we share now is something truly special, and amazing. She will always have a place in my heart. I hope I have a place there in hers now, but not forever," Richie's voice carried on, and Henry even felt a tear of his own fall. He wiped it quick, because he was supposed to be there for Ryan.
"Princess I love you, I always always will. I'm sorry I did this, I would take it back, but I feel as if this is how things are meant to be. Everything happens for a reason right?" Richie smiled out, "Now I need you to leave the room baby," He spoke softly now, looking her in the eyes.
"Richie no-" Her now broken tearful voice got cut off by Richie placing his lips on hers. Their lips moved in sync, and his hands grabbed her waist softly. Henry watched as her hands snaked around his neck.
They pull away, and Ryan took his face in her hands. She rested her forehead in his. She leaned in once more to gently kiss his lips. "Please don't make me say goodbye."
"Baby, I need you to leave okay? I'll see you again. I promise," His tears wouldn't stop but neither would hers.
A female nurse placed her hand on the back of Ryan's back. Whispering to her that it was time to go. Ryan got off the bed and ran out the door, her hand covering her mouth so her sobs would be silent.
"Henry- stay," Richie mumbled.
"Yeah?" He sniffed, trying to put his bad boy image back on.
"Please, take care of her. All the other boys already knew that it was my decision to go like this. I told Eddie first thing this morning, he came in crying. I made sure he past on the message. But I know she's broken. Please fix her and tell her it's okay to forget about me okay? It's okay," His words were jumbled by his cries, and he looked down.
"Of course Richie, and I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry," Henry cursed and looked at him. By the look in Richie's eyes, Henry knew that Richie knew what he was talking about.
"Henry it's okay, I forgive you. Now get outta here," Henry saw him smile and he returned the grin as he turned out the door.
"Henry! One more thing," Richie shouted as best as he could. Henry twisted on his heels to face him.
"Yeah?"
"Give this to her, when you know she's ready," Richie sighed and handed Henry a white envelope.
"Okay, I will," Henry whispered, and clenched onto the letter without looking at writing on the front.
"Now seriously, get outta here," He teased before Henry shuffled out of the room.
The doctor rushed back in as soon as he knew both of them were out. Ryan's eyes hopefully looked at the door.
Then they heard the heart monitor cut off, and all noise was faded away. Ryan's sobs continued to get louder, until the turned into screams. Henry pulled her into his embrace, and hugged her. One hand on the back of her head and the other on the small of her back.
Her hushed cries stained his red shirt as they stood there. Henry's mind still mixed up about what just happened.
"I loved him so much Henry," She softly cried into his chest.
"I know you did Ryan, I know you did."
As Henry hugged the broken down girl, he held the front of the letter up to read what it said. In small, messy print it read: To whoever loves her next...