Y/N's P.O.V.
I stumbled out of bed and over to the kitchen, noticing a wine bottle set on the table in front of the couch. I immediately thought of Camila and made my way over to her separate bedroom in the hotel room. As I walked in, I was met with an empty bed. "Camila?" I called out as I walked towards the bathroom door. I knocked, receiving no reply. By now, I began to panic a little and took out my phone.
Just as I was about to text the younger girl, I heard a soft clicking sound, followed by the door opening. In walked Camila, her hair a mess and her clothes wrinkled. She quietly shut the door before looking up and jumping as she saw me looking at her. "H-hey. You scared me." She laughed awkwardly.
"Where were you?" I asked. I had an idea what happened but I refused to believe it.
"Out." Camila replied lamely. She placed her phone on the small table in the kitchen, removing her sweatshirt.
"No shit." I rolled my eyes. "Where is 'out'?" I questioned. I noticed Camila stiffen up.
"That doesn't matter, Y/N." She muttered, sitting on the couch.
"Were you with him?" I asked, my voice quivering. Camila sent me a questioning gaze. "Matthew, Camila. Were you with Matthew." I clarified, crossing my arms defensively.
"No." She replied sternly. "Jesus, Y/N. We're not even together and you still get jealous over nothing." Camila ran her hand through her hair, her fingers getting caught in the tangles.
"I'm not jealous. I'm just wondering who you were with."
"Why do you assume I was with someone?" She questioned, standing up and sending a glare my way.
"Cause your hair's a mess, your clothes are wrinkled beyond belief, and you smell like sex. That's why." Camila looked down as I spoke, her tongue poking at the inside of her cheek.
"Why do you care?" She asked quietly, my ears straining to catch it. "Huh?" She looked up, raising her voice now. "You ended it with me. You said we're just friends. So tell me, why do you care who I was with?"
"It's been less than a week, Camila! And you already fucked someone else! Don't you see how bad that makes me feel?!" I yelled, walking closer to her.
"I needed to feel something, okay? Something other than the pain of you leaving me. So I drank some wine and decided to..." Camila trailed off, looking down again.
"Fuck someone." Camila's head shot up to meet my eyes. "You decided to fuck someone. You could have just talked to me, Camila. Do you think this is easy on me?" I lowered my voice, sitting on the couch, my head in my hands.
"I...I don't know. I figured you wanted this and...fuck, I don't know." Camila sat next to me. "Listen, you wanted to know what happened after I left? Well, I found comfort in other people. Not a lot, per se, but still. Sex filled the void I felt. Even if it was only for a little while."
"Camila, you don't have to-"
"No, Y/N. I do. You deserve to know." She cut me off, leaning back, eyes trained on the ceiling. "I was at an event maybe...I don't know...a year later? Anyway, that's where I met Lauren. We hit it off and she was obviously attracted to me and was extremely flirtatious. That's when it started. Her and I. It was just sex for me but...she felt more. So, I called it off cause I couldn't give her that." Camila took a deep breath before continuing. "Shawn came later. Like, three months later. Management loved him. After Lauren and I were spotted so much, people became suspicious over my sexual orientation. So I figured, why not give it a try? We tried dating but...I felt nothing. Less than I felt for Lauren, even. So soon, that became just sex to me too. When Shawn realized what I was using him for, he broke up with me. So I found my way back to Lauren and we became...friends with benefits, I guess."
"How long did that last? The second time with Lauren?" I asked quietly, through my hands.
"Up until Boston. Our last time was a week before that. I called it off for good when you agreed to give us another try. She understood, gladly."
"Was that the last time though? That you slept with her?" I pushed.
"It was...until last night." Camila muttered, looking down at her hands as she played with her fingers. "I-I'm sorry. I know it's not healthy but sex is my way of forgetting, ya know?"
"You don't have to explain unhealthy coping mechanisms to me, Camila. I'm very familiar with them." I chuckled dryly, rubbing my thigh which was still rather tender.
"Yeah..." Camila nodded, a silence falling over is both. "That's what sex if for me. It's what...that is for you, I guess." For the first time since I found out about her rendezvous, I understood.
"I get it." I told her, looking over at her for the first time since she began talking. "I'm not mad. Just a little hurt, I guess."
"That's the last thing I wanted."
"I know." I smiled reassuringly, grabbing her hand. "Just know...I still love you. I think I always will, okay?" Camila smiled softly back at me, before nodding in understanding.
"I love you too, so much, mi amor." She kissed my forehead, smoothing my hair back. "I won't do it again, okay?"
"Me either." I told her, not knowing if I would keep that promise or not, but nonetheless I said it. "No more unhealthy shit for us."
"Besides unhealthy food. That we keep for sure." She replied seriously. I laughed loudly at her antics before pulling her into my chest. After some time of me just running my hand through Camila's hair, detangling it to the best of my ability, she spoke up. "I'm telling them." She looked up at me from my lap.
"What?" I furrowed my brows, looking down at her brown eyes. "Telling who what?"
"Everyone. About you...about us." She replied, biting her lip. My eyes widened as I sat up, Camila following suit.
"Camila...your label could drop you."
"Fuck 'em" She smiled. "I don't wanna hide you. It's been too long." I stared at her in astonishment, unable to form words. "Are you okay with that?"
Finally able to come back to my senses, I replied with a joke. "We're not even together, Camila." I teased. She smirked, her hand coming up to cradle my cheek. She pressed a soft kiss on my lips, pulling the breath from my lungs.
"No? Cause it feels like we kinda are." She giggled. I followed her lips as she pulled away, bringing her into yet another kiss, she moaned in surprise. I pulled away, not even trying to fight the smile that broke across my face.
"You're so annoying." I told her, still smiling.
"You love it." She replied, sticking her tongue out and furrowing her nose.
"I do...so fucking much." I pulled her into me again, holding her innocently in my lap.
"I love you, Y/N." Camila whispered into my chest, her voice groggy with sleep.
"I love you too, Cami." I replied with a kiss to her head, allowing my head to lay back on the couch and my eyes to shut.
It's amazing how fast she can have my resolves crumbling. How fast she can reel me back in. After last time we tried our relationship again, I should be scared of the outcome. But, laying here with Camila in my arms, in an unfamiliar hotel room in the middle of Los Angeles, I felt nothing but contentment. I trusted her. All of her. I have my issues and she has her own. They may be two separate demons but they're there. And I'll be damned if I let my emotions get in the way of having her. We'll get through this. We always do. Not even years of separation could hold us apart. It's at this moment that I realized that this is it. This is all I need. I have my best friend back, and I have the love of my life. That's all I need and all I want.
(a/n) so hehehehehehhe that's that.
all that's left is the epilogue. It will most likely be two parts consisting of two time jumps. i know it's soon but I have SO many other ideas. i will probably come back and write a sequel that takes place in between the two part epilogue if y'all would like that.
also quick note, it's obvious that Y/N has some issues to deal with regarding self harm and Camila with her need for sex to feel complete. i am in no way condoning unhealthy relationships. this is simply just a story of two people who need each other to feel happy and complete. with that said, no, i don't believe you need someone to feel whole. so please, just appreciate the cute story that covers big issues.
and finally, thank you to everyone who read, voted, and commented on this. it feels so good to hear your compliments and read your funny comments.
thanks for reading guys❤️❤️❤️