I placed my bags down with a huff. I carried my normal side bag that I had back at the farm, but I had found a black backpack that I could place more essentials in. I kept my personal items in my side bag mainly, so I could keep things organized. It was a good habit that I had grown into. I needed to know where every thing was in case of emergencies. Luckily, I had found a way to clip my side bag to the backpack, so it wouldn't be on my actual side. It would've only been in the way if I needed to fight.
I slid the bags over to the corner of the room, so I would, hopefully, not trip over them. I inspected the cell that I had picked out. It was what you would expect of a prison cell, except the fact that it abandoned so long ago. I took the pillow and blanket off the tiny mattress and beat the dust off of them before neatly making the bed. I did the same to the top bunk, then laid down on the bottom bunk. I closed my eyes and tried to rest as the day played on rewind in my head.
"Excuse me, Miss, but is this bunk taken?" I heard Carl's voice filled my ears with fake politeness. I opened one eyes to see him holding his bags waiting for me to answer.
"What? Did Hershel refuse to let you stay in a cell with Beth?" I closed my eyes again and draped an arm over my face. I could hear his footsteps get closer until he grabbed my leg and pulled me off the bed. I caught myself before my head could hit the ground then looked at him with annoyance. "What was that for? Scared to admit you have a crush?"
Carl placed his butt in the spot I was previously in and threw his bags over in the corner with mine. "I do not have a crush on Beth. I just.. find her pleasant to look at."
"Did you just say pleasant? When did you learn big words, lover boy?" I scoffed as I got up from the ground and plopped onto the mattress next to him. I couldn't help but notice the slight burning feeling in my chest when he admitted he thought Beth was cute.
"Okay, Beth's pretty." he admitted, looking down almost in shame, "But she isn't the prettiest girl I have ever met."
"Well, then. Who is the prettiest girl you have ever met, Mr. Grimes?" I teased. I smiled as I watched his cheeks turn a deep red. It had been the first time I had ever seen him blush that hard. He adverted his blue eyes from me. Sadly before I could get an answer, Beth called for Carl and I. Since our cell was so far from the cells the others had chosen, her voice echoed.
Carl instantly stood and left the cell before I could even blink. I couldn't help but wonder. Who was the prettiest girl he had ever seen? And why did I get that burning feeling in my chest? I shook it off, then followed after Carl.
꧁꧂
Our first night in the prison was peaceful to say the least. I still slept with one eye open though. It was hard to actually feel safe after being on the run for so long. I knew Carl felt the same way because he kept tossing and turning on the bottom bunk.
When I woke up, Carl was still snoring away. I decided to slip my dirty black converse on, and snuck out to go check on Lori. She was always waking up around the time I did, so I had made a routine of spending most of my mornings with her. I had to admit that I quite enjoyed bonding with Lori, despite Carl's distance from her. I understood why it was hard for him to accept her affair with Shane. Honestly, I didn't like it either because she was married, but part of me felt pity for Lori. The situation was quite a mess, but I had decided to move past it. Rick and Carl hadn't done that yet.
I hummed to myself as I passed by the empty cells until I reached the one that Lori shared with Carol. Once I looked inside, I gasped at the sight before me. Lori was leaning over on the bed, her hands on her knees as she rocked herself back and forth. She looked as though she could begin having a panic attack at any moment. Carol squatted in front of her, trying to calm her pregnant friend. The two looked up at me as a result of my gasp. I dropped my bag on the floor at the foot of the bunk and got on my knees next to Carol.
"What's wrong?" I asked, grabbing Lori's hand. She was breathing hard as she looked between Carol and I. I turned to Carol for an answer.
"I think she's worried about the baby. She said she thought something may be wrong." the short gray haired woman answered.
"Um, where is Hershel?" I questioned her, as I scanned over the possibilities of what could be wrong in my head. Of course, there was no way to be sure, but Hershel could make a better guess than me.
"He's with Rick and the others. He said he wanted to help as they pushed into the prison more through the tombs."
"Go get him, please." I tried to demand softly. Carol began to walk away when I called out to her. "Don't let Rick get suspicious. He doesn't need to worry about Lori when he's about to lead almost everyone into the tombs."
She nodded then walked out of the cell to get Hershel. I turned back to Lori and sat criss-cross in front of her on the floor. "You need to calm down and take deep breaths. You don't want to stress yourself out. It isn't good for you or the baby."
I started breathing deeply to show her how to cal down. She steadied her breathing as she followed my lead. After a few moments, her breathing was slower, but still too fast to be normal. Hershel came in just as I had calmed her down a little.
"It's the baby. I think I lost it." She immediately said, causing me to whip my head to face her quickly. I knew she was worried, but I didn't expect her to think she lost the baby all together.
"You haven't felt it move?" Hershel asked, squatting next to me.
"Nothing. And no Braxton-Hicks. At first I thought it was exhaustion or malnutrition." Lori answered. "If we're all infected, then so is the baby. So what if it's stillborn? What if it's dead inside me right now? What if it rips me apart?"
The imagery of her words made me shiver. I almost excused myself, but I wanted to be there for Lori. So I stayed in my place as I saw a small tear fall down her face and squeezed her hand.
"Stop. Don't let your fear take control of you." Hershel stated, softly.
"Okay. Then let's say it lives and I die during childbirth."
"That's not going to happen."
I spoke, agreeing with Hershel.
"Why not? How many women died in childbirth before modern medicine? Id I come back, what if I attack it?" She had seriously been thinking about all this? "Or you? Or Rick? Or Carl? Or even Emily? If I do, if there is any chance, you put me down immediately. You don't hesitate, me, the baby if we're walkers, you don't hesitate and you don't try to save us. Okay? It might have been better if-"
"If what?"
"I'd never made it off the farm." Lori stated. I released her hand, hurt at her thoughts. How could she think that?
"You're exhausted, frightened." Hershel stated.
"My son can't stand me."
"He loves you, Lori. He's just having a hard time processing everything." I s\insisted, causing the woman, who had become a mother figure to me, to look at me.
"And my husband, after what I put him through." I dropped my head at her words. I didn't know what to say about Rick. He had changed so much since this all began.
"We've all been carrying that weight all winter." Hershel spoke up.
Lori turned back to the old man she was confiding. "I tried to talk to him. He hates me. He's too good a man to say it, but I know. I put him and Shane at odds. I put that knife in his hand."
We were quiet for a moment before Hershel spoke up once again. "You know who doesn't give a shit about that? This baby. Now let's make sure everything's all right."
꧁꧂
Hershel said that he thought the baby was perfectly fine. He said it was sort of normal for a baby to become still just before the birth, so hopefully we'll have a healthy baby within a few days.
I had walked down to where the group was gearing up to head into the tombs. Rick hadn't asked if I wanted to go. If he had, I'd be suiting up. After being on the road all winter and helping yesterday, I was becoming restless with the settling. I knew Carl would be aggravated if I went, but as I turned to see him placing a helmet, that was too big for him, on his head as he made Beth giggle, I realized that I shouldn't have to worry about that.
Rick approached the smiling Carl, "You won't need that. I need you to stay put." He took the helmet from his son before striding over and placing it in my hands, to my surprise.
"You're kidding." Carl scoffed at his dad, who grabbed my gun and loaded it before placing it beck in my belt.
"We don't know what's in there. Something goes wrong, you could be the last man standing. I need you to handle things here."
"So you're just going to take my best friend?" He raised his voice. I couldn't help but just watch the scene unfold. I didn't know what to say. "You did this same thing yesterday. Why do you keep putting her in danger?"
Rick pulled Carl and I down to the other side of the cell block to where no one could listen to our conversation. "I keep putting her in danger because I know that she can handle it." Rick spoke, semi-harshly.
I winced as I heard Carl choke on his breath. All he ever wanted to do was prove to his dad that he could handle things like this. "So you don't think that your own son can handle going in there with you?"
"It's not like that, Carl. If I had my way, Emily would be staying out here too."
"Then why isn't she? Why are you forcing her to go in there, huh?"
I stepped between the two as Carl got closer to his father in anger. I knew he wouldn't hit his dad. He would earn an ass whooping of the century. But I still didn't want them arguing. "I chose to, Carl. Just like yesterday. He isn't forcing me to do anything. I understand why he wants me to." I spoke softly causing Carl's confused and hurt blue eyes to stare at me. It caused my chest to tighten.
His face suddenly turned to anger as he stared at me. "Well then. Explain to me, Emily, because I don't understand why he wants you to at all."
I closed my eyes as he said my name. He had never really said my full name after we became friends. He always called me 'Em' or 'Highlights'. I gulped before looking up at him with watery eyes. "He wants to make sure that I don't turn out like-"
"Don't finish that sentence." Carl demanded, in a voice I had never heard come from his body. "Have you really convinced yourself that? Really, Em?"
"I guess I have. I guess that's what I'm scared to become and that's why I refuse to hang back when I can help." I stated, letting a single tear fall to the ground. I turned on my heel, ready to leave when Rick put and arm in front of me.
"It's my fault she believes that. I played along with it when she said it yesterday." He stated, both Carl and I looked up at him. Rick simply kept his head down. "Emily, you're nothing like him. I keep asking you to go because I simply expect you to. You have always been ready for anything ever since the CDC. I wasn't the only one who noticed that, and was asked to let you come help when I thought it was okay to."
I looked at him in curiosity. Who asked him this? "We're about to leave, so get ready. And Carl, I'm depending on you to keep everyone safe here." Carl nodded at his dad's words before Rick walked off.
He turned to me after his dad left. We stared at each other for a moment before I was pulled into his arms. "Don't ever compare yourself to Shane. You are so incredibly good."
With his words, a relief washed over me and a warmth spread across my cheeks. I pulled my arms up to his back to hold him as close as he was holding me. "And never think that your father isn't proud of you, Blue Eyes."
I know it's not candy, but I hope this makes a good Halloween treat. I had a small break from school work today and was in the mood for some fanfiction. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter because this may be one of the last good moments between Carl and Emily for a while. We all know it goes downhill from here. But I'm hoping to make this a roller coaster of a ride, so hang on guys!
Deuces!! ~Brittʕ•ᴥ•ʔ