AHRHYS HELD MY FACE WITH BOTH HANDS AND lowered his face onto mine. I tried to meet his loving gaze but I could not ignore the butterfly flitting near the painting behind his head.
It seemed to have come from nowhere. One moment it wasn't there, the next, it was fluttering about. Maybe it was a good sign. Maningning, Ahrhys' Mom said butterflies bring good luck for they are vessels. Temporary hosts for the souls of the departed who want to bless the living.
"Mahal na mahal kita, Yunjin." Ahrhys' voice brought my attention back to him. His handsome, boyish face echoed his words. His eyes were filled with love and longing, his tears were ready to fall.
Such love, such devotion.
Do I even deserve him?
Wala akong ibang gusto kung hindi ang mapaligaya si Ahrhys. Ayokong pagsisihan niya an gang desisyong ito. Pero....ni hindi ko kilala ang sarili ko. He nodded ever so slightly, as if he could read my mind...he does. He knew me better than I knew myself. Kailangan ko siya.
I parted my lips ready to be kissed by the most wonderful man, by the most patient, most kind, most.....the butterfly landed on the painting's plastic frame. It spread its wings wide, resembling two letter Bs, back to back. Then it closed them.
I gasped.
The two uppercase Bs.
Gold against quilted velvet.
Blinding white light exploded inside my head.
Next thing I knew, I was lying on the floor, my head on Ahrhys' lap and his mom was brandishing a tiny roll-cap bottle over my face. Smelled awful.
I sat up.
"Yunjin, okay ka na, mahal?" Sabi ni Ahrhys, handa akong yakapin.
I pushed him away, "I'm not Yunjin, you asshole!" I screamed. At Ahrhys. At his mom. At the pastor who was officiating this wedding....wedding!
OH. MY. GOD.
I saw the papers I just signed. I screamed some more, "How could you do this to me? All of you! How dare you!"
"Yunjin, patawarin mo ako. Mahal na mahal kita. 'Yun ang mahalaga, mahal ko---"
Humakbang palapit sa akin si Ahrhys. Napatitig ako sa mukha niya. Hindi ako makapaniwala...hindi ko matangagp. Kanina lang ay handa akong halikan siya...handa akong ibigay sa kanya ang lahat!
"I don't even know you---"Bile rose up to my throat. Hindi ko na napigil. I vomited on the pastor's shoes. Humanda itong alalayan ako. Ganoon rin sina Ahrhys. And the brides' maids in white skirts and tops. I hated them all.
I stepped back, "Don't you dare come near me." I warned Ahrhys and yanked the veil off my head. I threw it. His mother caught it. That was when I saw the gold letters.
On my bag.
Of course. The bitch had been using it. Said it was hers.
And I didn't know shit.
I yanked the Balenciaga clutch off her shoulder, "This is mine!"
They were all stunned.
Really?! Sila pa ang may ganang magulat.
I looked at my bag, "Oh!" I cried. My tears fell on the gold uppercase B's in the flap. I opened it. Pinagtatapon ko ang laman na alan kong hindi akin--handkerchief, a fan, a comb. And then, my wallet! Also a Balenciaga. It was a yellow papier mini wallet, popular last year. It still contained my credit cards and IDs.
"How dare you all!" Sigaw ko ulit. I got all the identifications needed and they hid them from me...made me believe I was from Mindoro and called me Yunji. "How could you...I'll sue you all! You're all going to jail for this---" I removed the IDs that weren't mine including the senior citizen's ID. I was raised to be considerate regardless of a situation.
But I kept the cash in the wallet.
I checked the Balenciaga for another very important item. My phone. I knew Ahrhy's opportunist mother was using it too. I see her with it everyday for the past month.
My Samsung Galaxy S10+
It was so high-tech these people had opened it easily. All they had to do was press my thumb on it. It was new, just got it from the provider and I haven't switched it yet to more traditional unlocking feature.
Now it wouldn't accept my prints.
I shoved it to the awful woman, "Open it." I said. She hesitated. "OPEN IT!" I screamed so loud, Maningning relented then I disabled the feature which took a while. I had to re-familiarize myself with the features and my hands were shaking.
It didn't help that Ahrhys kept saying, "Yunjin, mahal na mahal kita...hindi mo maiintindihan....nagmamahalan tayo."
I ignored him the best I could. Kahit gusto ko nang ibato sa kanya ang cell phone. He was crazy. Delusional.
"You'll hear from my lawyer." Sabi ko pagkatapos at tumakbo na ako palabas ng chapel. In my wedding gown.
"Yunjiiiii!" Ahrhys cried. "Mahal na mahal kita!"
"Oh, God." I cringed and hurried down the stairs. I was in a small building. That chapel was in one of the units Ahrhys' church rented or owned--hindi ko alam-- in the second floor. I wouldn't even call it a church. It was cult.
The Lamb of Light and...Whatever Church.
They made me clean it every day for one fucking month! Including the toilets. I mopped. scrubbed, swept and dusted its fucking floor. What were those people thinking? They took advantage of me instead of...helping me.
How could people be so....evil?
I cried again but I didn't stop running away. I wanted to go home.
It was so hot outside, for a moment I regretted throwing my veil. I crossed the street and hailed the oncoming jeepney.
The passengers understandably all gawked at me. But they all moved to give way to my bulky wedding dress. It belonged to Maningning, or so they said. Siguro nga, pangit kasi. It got bubble sleeves and bubble skirt, the bodice was heavily beaded and sequined. It came with a pair of fingerless bridal gloves, as beaded and as sequined. I started to remove them.
The middle aged woman in front of me couldn't help her curiosity anymore, "I-Ikakasal ka ba, Ineng?" Tanong niya.
"Uh...yes. I mean, opo. Pero....ayoko na po." I have removed the gloves. Hindi ko naman malaman saan ko ilalagay. Gusto kong itapon sa bintana pero ayokong magkalat. CLAYGO. Napilitan akong isilid sa Balenciaga ang gloves.
"Tumakas ka sa kasal mo?!" The woman exclaimed, echoed by the rest of the passengers. "Bakit?" They asked in unison.
"N-Nakilala ko na po ang sarili ko."
Tumango ang ale sa harap ko, "At ne-realize mo, hindi mo pa gustong mag-asawa."
Hindi na ako sumagot. I fished out my phone. My heart sank. All my contacts and social media accounts were deleted. And according to the text messages, the provider has temporarily disabled my outgoing services due to unpaid balance. The amount was over six thousand pesos.
Those lunatics used my phone but didn't bother to pay the bill.
"Taga-saan ka, 'ne?" The question was from an old man.
"Makati, Sir." I answered.
"Saan sa Makati?"
I was about to answer but another woman passenger posed a question, "Sino ang mapapangasawa mo sana?"
But then the middle-aged woman in front of me asked the driver to stop. She got off. The driver stepped on the gas again. I yelled seconds later, "Stop. Wait." As soon as the jeepney did, I got off.
Nakatawid na sa kalsada ang ale at naglalakad sa opposite sidewalk. I hurried to her, "Wait! Ma'am! Ma'am!"
She stopped and turned.
"Ma'am--" I said breathlessly. It was freaking hot outside and inside my freaking dress. "I am sorry to bother you but I need your help."
"Magtatago ka sa mapapangasawa mo sana." Sabi niya. She had a quiet sort of authority. I am guessing a school teacher. She carried a handbag and an eco bag. Galing siya sa palengke, base sa laman ng eco bag.
"I need a landline phone. I'm wondering if you know where I can find---"
"Halika sa bahay. May landline kami." Balewala siyang pumihit sa gate na katabi namin, inabot ang kandado at binuksan.
"You...live here?"
Two-storey house. Unpainted facade. Jalousie windows.
She let me in. Small, tiled front yard. To the right was their laundry area. Washing machine and other laundry implements were piled there. Potted plants were neatly arranged along the low concrete fence.
There were a couple of steps to the front door. She simply elbowed the door open, "Pasok ka muna..ano pala ang pangalan mo?"
"Kiki."
"Kiki?"
"Valderama." Kinuha ko sa bag ang wallet ko, ibinigay ko sa kanya ang lisensya ko, "Karina Valderama. Kiki po ang nickname ko."
Ibinaba niya ang eco bag bago binasa ang ID, tumango-tango bago nanlaki ang mga mata, "Forbes Park? Taga-Forbes park ka?"
"Opo."
"E , sino 'yung mapapangasawa mo sana? Tagarito sa Bulalacao?"
"Opo. Z-Zabala ang last name. Ahrhys Zabala."
"Ah--rhys Zabala. Taga rito?" Parang nagtataka siya kung bakit hindi niya kilala kung taga Bulalacao rin.
"He was from the church across an eatery, I guess."
"Ah." Tango ng ginang bago napabulalas, "Dun ka nanggaling? Kaya dun ka sumakay sa tapat?"
"Opo."
"Aba'y paano...teka nga, pasok na muna. Umupo ka muna, pasensya na sa bahay namin..upo ka muna. Ikukuha kita ng tubig."
"Thank you, Ma'am. Uh, ano po ang pangalan n'yo?"
"Mrs. Luciano. Petrita Luciano. Petring ang tawag nila sa akin."
"Pleased to meet you, Ma'am Petring." I held out my hand to her.
"You too."
We shook hands. Pinaupo uli niya ako at nagpunta siya sa kusina nila. It was the kitchen and dining room in one you could see upon entry.
"Paano nangyari na ikakasal ka dun sa sinasabi mo, eh, taga-Forbes Park ka pala" sabi niya habang nasa kusina pa rin, "Hindi naman sa pag-aano....huwag mong mamasamain, member ka ba ng simbahan nila?"
"Hindi po."
"So, paano mo nakilala ang mga 'yun?" Bumalik na siya sa salas. Binigyan ako ng isang basong tubig.
Naubos ko sa sobrang uhaw ko.
"I was with friends. We were staying at a hotel outside town. A-Aakyat kami sa bundok but I received a call and I felt so bad afterwards, I told my friends I wouldn't be joining them anymore. I got matters to attend to back in Manila.
"The next day, I woke up late. My friends had gone ahead. But I changed my mind about going back home. Sumunod na lang ako sa mga kasama ko. I hired a guide but I didn't like the way he was looking at me. I dismissed him and proceeded to hike alone."
"Delikado 'yun, Ineng. Mahiwaga raw 'yang Mt. Bulalacao, maraming nawawala d'yan kahit akala ng marami, madali lang akyatin."
"Yeah." I agreed. "I got lost and at some point, I lost my footing. I fell. When I came to, I was with...Ahrhys, in his van. I...couldn't remember anything. I didn't even know my name. I didn't have any IDs. My backpack wasn't with me but of course, I didn't even know I had a backpack and some other things. "
"Nagka-amnesia ka?"
"I guess. And I believed him...them. They said Ahrhys and I were lovers and we were getting married. They said we loved each other so much and they were so nice to me. They called me Yunjin and said I was from Mindoro. Inaabuso raw ako ng father ko doon at iniligtas ako ng...church nila. Dinala nila ako dito para hindi ako masundan ng father ko at nakilala ko si Ahrhys....oh, God..." I wailed. "Kanina lang bumalik sa 'kin ang lahat...I saw a butterfly and I remembered my bag..this bag."
"Teka muna. Namumundok ka, ganyan ang bag mo?" A man said. He was at the stairs beside the divan. Bumaba siya ng dalawa pang baitang bago naupo. He was shirtless and barefoot. He only had on a pair of ripped jeans. Hair long like Keanu Reeves. Eyes somewhat droopy but alert. Mas maa-appreciate ko siguro ito kung hindi ganito ang sitwasyon ko.
"Ah, si Adam. Anak ko. Adam, si Kiki." Pakilala ni Mrs. Luciano.
He chuckled, "Ki--Ki? As in..."
"Basta Kiki." Sabi ni Mrs. Luciano.
"This is a clutch bag." I said to the guy. "This fits perfectly inside my backpack. I had it with me because I'd be heading straight to a luncheon after our hike. I brought the appropriate outfit, left them at the hotel...but decided I didn't trust the hotel. I debated what to bring with me, this bag or my high heels. In the end, it was a matter of which would fit nicely in the backpack."
"Okay." He shrugged like he didn't really care. "Napaniwala ka nung mga baliw na may relasyon kayo nung Ahrhys. Pwede mo silang idemanda....nakasal ba kayo?"
"I'm afraid so." I wanted to cry again.
"Pero walang bisa 'yun." Sabi ni Mrs. Luciano. "May amnesia ka, wala ka sa katinuan. Tsaka, hindi naman yata recognized 'yung sekta nila...parang basta na sumulpot dito."
"Kulto kasi 'yon, Ma." Sabi ni Adam.
"I agree." Sabi ko. "Can I use the phone now?"
"Ay, oo nga. Sorry, nawala sa isip ko. Sige na, tawag na." Tumayo si Mrs. Luciano, "Ikukuha kita ng pamalit na damit d'yan sa suot mo." She headed to the stairs, sinabihan si Adam, "Mag-T-shirt ka nga. Para kang Edgar Mande d'yan."
"Sino naman 'yun?" He asked.
"Yun ang tunay mong ama....bumili ka pala ng mami-siopao kay Ling-Ling, makapagmeryenda muna si Kiki."
"Kiki talaga?" He chuckled again. Then, "Excuse me, Kiki." Sabi niya pagdaan sa harapan ko.
"Hoy, Adam!" Tawag naman uli ni Mrs. Luciano bago pa nakalabas nang pinto ang lalaki, "Mag-T-shirt ka sabi ko. Pag nainitan 'yang likod mo, lalabas na na naman ang bungang-araw mo."
"Okay na 'to." Lumabas na ang lalaki.
"Tigas ng ulo. Nakuu." Umakyat na rin sa itaas si Mrs. Luciano.
People in this town sure are weird, I thought as I dialed the number that I didn't even know existed until today.
It rang.
And soon, I heard the comforting voice of Aysa.
"Aysa, it's me." I said. My voice trembled. My eyes welled up with tears. Didn't know I would miss my idiot maid so much.
"Miss? Miss Kiki? Miss Kiki! Miss Kikiiiii! Ikaw nga! Nasaan ka? Where are you? Hinahanap ka ng Kuya mo. Kailangan na daw magbayad ng tax ang bahay. Nagbabayad pala ng tax ang bahay, Miss Kiki? Nagtatago ka ba sa kuya mo kaya ka nawala?"
"Aysa, tawagan mo si Danelle. Tell her to call my mobile or this number. ASAP. I will explain everything when I get back. Just do it now."