She never told him how much she cried,
It's not called lying if you only hide,
When he came back home drunk,
She would sit by his side,
Let him kiss wherever,
He never even noticed those tears in her eyes.
But she liked to pretend things,
Like their love hasn't faded,
And she was the same girl she was when they were eight,
But now the streets won't stop barking.
When she was 12, her mother told her,
If you find love, nothing else matters,
She's in Bombay, now, working as a waitress,
Her boy bought her a little place, often buys her pretty bracelets,
But her mother never told when she was 17,
That dimond bracelets don't hide blue and green bruises,
And now she feels like she deserves it.
So when the lights are out,
She cries silently, she knows she's only pretending,
She knows she's wrong to defend him,
The love she once had for her boy, hasn't faded,
Not faded, but broken, someone should really tell her.
She was with her man when the doorbell rang,
The nextdoor guy was on the door, told her he saw her crying,
Asked her if she was okay,
He said "If something goes down, you can call me, I'll be there, even in night"
Months passed, at nights, she would still cry,
But she never picked up the phone and dialled,
The number that was saved by a different name, so her man wouldn't find
Now the next door guy could no longer stare,
Because she won't ever sleep, he baby girl was always crying,
And even if she she's a few years with the little princess,
Nobody would really notice that her mascara's smeared.
Even now when the phone rang, nextdoor boy hoped it was her,
But his mother told him, when he was little, not to ever bother yourself in a lover's quarrel,
But it wasn't a quarrel, neither were they lover's,
She only suffered and her man didn't deserve her.
He thought he could really convince her,
That love is not what matters if she had to cover her bruises with necklaces and long t-shirt sleeves,
But he never realized, that the door was always open,
And she always had the keys,
She never left because she felt like she deserved it.
Now she only hoped that her baby girl would be pretty nice someday,
She would find some nice love, and leave the next day,
That moment, she realized what she wanted was a lot whole different than what she had,
She ran to the nextdoor guy, to tell him he was right,
That night, she wept as she packed her bags,
But she never once looked back since she left that door.
Now she's 60, next door guy still by her side,
Her daughter is happy and she likes to think her mother never cried,
She isn't a waitress anymore, she owns a cafe in the Eastside,
Her neighborhood boy loves her like the dark night loves the moonlight,
And nothing really mattered, because even if in this moment, she died,
She found her love and tears never saw her eyes.
-Sia.