Warning: suicidal thoughts. Guilt and negative thoughts
—(Y/n) POV—
Tonight was Catras big plan
Taking over Salineas
I was scared
Just seeing what happened at Elberon made me want to puke
Now an entire kingdom will fall
I wish I wasn't terrified of Catra
Because then I could get on a skiff and get out
But everyone at Berk is almost out
Just 40 more people need to escape and I think that'll happen tonight when Hordak is in Salineas and most of the guards will be to
Just a little longer
Double Trouble called us and Catra picked up
"The princesses are heading to Dryl to take it back" Double Trouble says
Catra smiles and I feel immense guilt
'Entrapta is gone and I let it happen. Fuck why can't I just stand up to Catra'
"I'll tell the soldiers at Dryl to plan an attack" Catra says
A few hours later we get word that the rebellion failed to take over Dryl
"The princesses are moping about Dryl and the emotion. It was beautiful" Double Trouble says
"The plan is almost complete" Catra says
Catra hangs up and we head to the vehicle area where people are loading up stuff to destroy Salineas
"The last time we went to Salineas-" I say
"We failed and nearly died. I know (Y/n)" Catra hissed
"No, I was just going to say you hated the water" I say
"Whatever" Catra says
We watch everyone load up stuff and Catra is yelling at everyone and I'm just standing there awkwardly not knowing what to do
(When the teacher yells at the class when you are trying to present to the class. Yeah that feeling)
I hated the way Catra was treating people
Even Scorpia got sick of it
We haven't seen Scorpia for a while
I hope she's ok
Double Trouble calls in again and I don't want to hear what they have to say because I know it'll be bad
"Move, now! We don't have all night, Kyle!" Catra yells
'You're doing your best Kyle'
"Meoow. You all right there, kitten?" Double Trouble says
"About time you checked in. Are the princesses still moping around about Dryl?" Catra asks
"No. Watching them mope was my favorite. Now they're playing detective, searching for the elusive Horde spy who foiled their plans" Double Trouble says
'Good, come on guys, just think about it, looks can be deceiving. All of your plans have failed since flutterina joined you. But you guys might not want to believe it because she's a kid. Well kids here have committed crimes and killed people'
"Wait, spy? Is your cover blown?" Catra angrily asks
"Please, who would suspect a goody-two-shoes like Flutterina? Besides, if they start to get suspicious, I'll just do a quick wardrobe change and throw the blame onto someone else" Double Trouble says and transforms into a bright moon guard
'Please get caught. Please get caught'
"They better not. You have to keep them in Bright Moon. If they catch on before our plan is complete, before the big mission is done, I--" Catra angrily says
'Anger...Catras entire personality'
"Darling, darling, don't worry. I'll just tire them out a bit" Double Trouble says as they transform into themselves
Catra hangs up and we wait for everyone to be done packing up to attack innocent people
"Come on (Y/n)" Catra says as she pulls me up on the ship
We head to Salineas and Catra doesn't even seem scared of the water
"Force Captain Scorpia, we're headed to Salineas" Catra says into her button thing
The button thing just has static and Catra looks annoyed
"Maybe the distance and water is affecting it" I say
"Yeah maybe" Catra says
We were at the top of the ship and Catra was clinging to my arm
"You ok Catra?" I ask
"The big plan is happening, I've spent so long planning it, it'll all be worth it, everything would have been worth it" Catra says so desperately
"I'll take that as a yes" I say nervously
Catra looks at me and I look away
I can't look her in the eyes anymore because of the fear of her hurting me
I'm so scared and I couldn't stop this even if I wanted to
Why would Adora listen to me
I tried to hurt her at the battle of bright moon
I let Catra nearly kill her so many times
I couldn't stop Catra from opening the portal
I couldn't tell Glimmer and Bow Entrapta was alive
I couldn't save Entrapta from beast island
All I did was let Catra destroy homes and families
I should just jump off the boat and drown
But Hiccup
He's my best friend and he saved my life and I'm going to save his
I gained some confidence and but I couldn't stop what was happening now but I will confront Catra later about her being a terrible person or I'll just leave
We arrive at Salineas and Hordak fires his weapon and the sea gate starts to open and the soldiers invade it
The screams of the people are haunting me
I see all this death and destruction and I'm scared
I start trembling and Catra grabs my hand
"Look at this shorty" Catra says
Everything is being destroyed
"W-Why?" I ask
"It's what all my hard work payed off" Catra says
I don't hold Catras hand
I try to get out of her grip and she lets go and puts her arm around my shoulders
I can still help the rebels right? I mean have they caught Double Trouble? Do they know about horde prime?
My family has escaped
Most of Berk has escaped
I saved my friends but can I save myself
Hiccup needs me
I need Hiccup
I thought Catra needed me
She's just going crazy with everything going on
I don't care what it takes I'll escape
I'm not a fucking hero
But I can still help the rebellion
Maybe
I might be able to escape
If I can escape
I can still escape
I will escape
And I'll never turn back
—————————
A/n: short chapter but the good stuff is coming
I proof read this in my brothers car while having a McDonald's milkshake while my brother talks to his gf