Beam POV
I saw with my own eyes how Forth loves. He had a girlfriend a few years back. She's our classmate before. They were together for about a year. He's still the same jerk then, had a habit of saying things bluntly but you can see that he cares for her and gives priority to how he'll make the girl happy.
It even came to the point that he asked me weird things like what to do on their monthsary, etc. I gave some suggestions but in the end I'll just quip, "Why are you asking me and not Mina?"
"Ehhhh Beammmmmiiieeeee... I have no romance in my body. Help me naaaaaaa.", he'll answer much to my chagrin.
One month after their anniversary, Forth learned that his bitch of a girlfriend was two-timing him with another guy. They broke up not before Forth breaking the guy's mouth.
Forth couldn't be bothered then. Mina, Wayo, and I didn't know how to share his despair. I volunteered to talk to him since I was there in the duration of his relationship with that whore. We had a drinking sesh one evening and just after a few beers, he cried everything over my shoulder in a spur of drunkeness. He fell asleep with his face buried on my shoulder so I just let him. It's a simple way making him feel that he's not alone and was not at fault that he loved truly and deeply.
That's why when he said how it hurts to be left behind, even if it was a joke, I gave some dead malice and walked more briskly. It's besides the point that I was already irked.
"Uy, Beam! Look! It's a fishball cart! Let's eat!", Forth invited me obviously oblivious to my arching brows.
I stopped and turned around. "Your treat?"
"Hell no, of course not. What's this? Are we in relationship?" He laughed out loud again.
"Why not? If I can get free fishballs. Hehe!", I answered. Sorry but I'm competitive.
"Shit, I didn't know that I can get you with just fishballs. If I've known, I would've bought you packs long before."
What? Did I hear that right?
"What's that?"
"Nothiiiiinnng. I said maybe Lam hadn't treated you to anything, right?"
We finally arrived at the fishball cart. Good thing there weren't that much people around.
T/N: So what we do, you get a stick and then skewer your way directly on the boiling oil. You can ask the vendor for a cup to place your sauce or you can dip the whole kebab directly in the jar. It comes with a variety of food stuffs such as: fishball, kikiam, chickenball, squidball. Some even have crabsticks. Sauces can be sweet, sour and spicy or even sweet and spicy.
I know what you're thinking. "That isn't hygienic!"
Well, that's exactly why it's called STREETFOOD. Part of the experience is eating it on the street with the city grime and pollution. Hahahha! I'm from Tondo, so it's really up my alley.
"Of course not yet. If he did, I already mentioned it to you guys."
"Whatever did you see in that guy?"
"Are we really going to that topic again?" I grabbed a stick and started spearing some balls. Forth did the same.
"Because he's handsome, smart, manly, things like that? In short, perfect guy?"
"Of course it's not just--"
"Then he's kind too and with a lot of extra curriculars?"
"That too but--"
"Student rep too. Hehe! Whole package."
"Yes! Yes! Just stop it!", I exclaimed which started the fishball vendor. "Yes, okay, he's my ideal guy! Fine! I like him because of everything you just said! Okay! I'm stupid in doing so!"
Forth was silent and was just staring at me while eating his fishballs.
"But, those were only part of the reason", I said more calmly. "For a change, I want to be the apple of the eye of everyone's apple of the eye."
Long silence.
"So, in short, Cinderella?", Forth quipped. He finished all his skewered fishballs while mine was turning cold by the minute.
I sighed. "Tsk."
"I understand.", Forth lips slowly curving to a smile. "It's hard to like someone who doesn't feel the same way about you."
It was my turn to be quiet while staring at him. Forth smile had a hit of melancholy even though it was the most beautiful smile that I've seen from his curved lips.
xoxo
Another day had come to pass but I still haven't started with that wretched letter. It was already Wednesday and the deadliest deadline is on Friday. I gave writing it some time yesterday but I just stared at the blinking cursor on the screen for 15 minutes. But when I couldn't squeeze anything from my brain, I moved on onto my project with Wayo in Feature Writing. Good thing they don't have the same deadline.
"So, need my help?", Wayo said as soon as he sat down. "In fairness, phi, you claimed the best spot here in the library."
"My forehead creased and looked around. I was in the study area in the library on my laptop while finishing our project.
"Why did you say so?"
"Because of that." Wayo pointed using his lips. Following its trajectory, I saw a tall handsome student not far from my spot. I sighed and returned my attention to my laptop.
"Such a whore, Yo."
Wayo chuckled. "I'm just teasing you phi. Of course, he will not fit the high standards set by your Lam."
"Haaaay, please Yo, Forth has been bugging me about him since yesterday already."
Wayo's facial expression suddenly changed. "Oh really? Why?"
"I don't really know about that imbecile. He always tries to get on my nerves."
Short pause of silence while I was working on the layout of our magazine project.
"How is he anyway?"
I quickly turned to Wayo as if his question was out of this world. Why did he even asked that? Aren't we all friends?
"Uhm... err... Well he's still a dickhead as usual." I stopped speaking, I was unsure if I should continue what I was about to say. "Why did you ask? He's your friend too."
Wayo elicited a wry smile. "But we're not as close as you two are."
I froze. Where is this coming from?
"You know, he just likes to piss me off because he thinks I'm an easy target for his antics." I replied. Wait. Why am I justifying my friendship with Forth?
"Since day one, you've almost been his favorite."
"To tease."
Silence once again but I broke it.
"Why, Yo? Are you having a problem with Forth?"
Wayo avoid my gaze and instead looked at the other students in the library.
"Not really but..." He hesitated but then he suddenly burst into a laugh. "I don't know. Anyway, I'll just go to the comfort room."
Wayo stood up and left. I was still dumbfounded on how our conversation went. I didn't notice that he placed his books near me and I hit them with my elbow which caused them to fall to the floor. I panicked and grabbed them from the floor when I noticed a small piece of paper inserted in between one of them. Out of curiosity, I opened it. I was thinking it might be one of the articles that Wayo will give me to layout in our project. My eyes widened when I realized what it was.
P'Forth,
Thank you. You were the first one that I became friends with since I transferred here. I was afraid then because not only was I new in the school, I'm also a year younger than most of our classmates. That's why when I got to know you, all my fears dissipated.
You are so kind to someone like me. I remembered the time when I came out to you, you said, "So what? The world will be a better place if you don't have to come out to others, don't you think?"
It made waves inside me. My heart beat faster and I almost cried in joy because for the first time in my life, I was accepted for who I am.
Thank you. Because of you, I met P'Beam and P'Mina. I gained new friends. I'm sure it's already evident but I'm a loner in my previous school. Many people don't like the true me. They think that being a homosexual is contagious. But you never thought that way. You let me enter your world and gave me more friends.
Thank you. For all your funny stories, for your jokes that I will never grow tired of hearing and laughing at, and all your quirky quips that I will never ever forget. You're one hell of a legend, P'Forth. I hope you will never change.
But above all, thank you because you taught me how to love without asking anything in return. Thank you, because your sweet smile erases the pain whenever I remember that you love someone else. Thank you, because you've shown me how you love unconditionally.
So in my dreams, I know how you will love me too.
Wayo
T/N: SHAKET BESH!!! 😭😭😭😭😭 (It hurts friend!!!)
Fuck! Fuck this shit! Now it all makes sense!
That's why Wayo was punching deeply with his statements earlier! Why didn't I notice this? And to think they are my friends!
All this time Wayo was in love with Forth and here comes stupid, me, who didn't even felt anything. All this fucking time, Wayo was jealous of my closeness with Forth. Why didn't this shit tell me? If I've known, I should've set some boundaries.
Shit shit shit! But wait, why should I avoid Forth? We're friends. Just friends. No malice. Ugh, but how bout Yo? I don't know what to do.
I returned the letter. I don't care if it's the right book where it was originally slipped in. What's important was that he doesn't notice that I read the letter. Good thing it took him so long to come back.
"Ugh, it's frustrating! The comfort room here on the ground floor is under maintenance. I went to the second floor just to powder up!", Wayo complained as soon as he came back. I acted busy like I was focused on my layout.
T/N: Remember that I told you that I'm thinking the setting is in my Alma Mater? Guess what? Our University Lib has 5 floors. Hehehe. On the ground floor, there are desks that you can use to do your schoolwork.
"Oh really?"
"So, how's it coming? Shit, I'm sure we'll have the most beautiful mag. I mean hello, you're like a master layout designer."
I couldn't respond. I was legitimately doing the layout design.
"Uy, earth to Beam! It's a compliment phi!"
This time, I turned to him. "Huh? What?:
"I just complimented your mad layouting skills, phi.", Wayo laughed. "Do you have something in your mind? Thinking of a problem?"
Problem? Problem? Nothing, there's no problem. I just didn't know that you love one of our friends which is close to me and your jealous of our closeness. Really nothing. No problem at all.
"Nothing, no problem at all." I returned to layouting. "Let's see, uhm..." I smiled at him. "I'm not sure how this next page will look."
"Oh, that's all? Don't fret. I'm sure you'll eventually get it. You get everything.", Wayo answered then laughed.
You get everything...
Fucking shit! I feel like I'm part of some lakorn.