Kyle's POV
Me and Stan walked home after we found out that Cartman was stalking me. That fatass is probably trying to ploy a new scheme to humiliate me, because he never has anything better to do. Why does he always target me though? Seriously, I've never done anything to him, yet he always just wants to torment me and, overall, make my life hell. Well, not this time tubby, this time, I've got the upper hand. Now that I've caught him during his scheming, I can stop him before he does anything to me. Stan might want to help, so I see no reason to stop him. I might need all the help I can get, considering what Cartman is capable of. Stan knows this too, which is why he's refusing to go home today. He vividly remembers when Cartman blackmailed me with that ginger cow stuff back in primary school, and he's vowed to never let it happen again. Such a thoughtful friend. Now, we're sitting on the floor, playing Candy land for the millionth time, because Stan broke my Xbox last month and my mom hasn't gotten to buying me a new one. We would use our phones, but I'm worried that Cartman might be signed into my accounts because he was watching me in Tech last Tuesday while signing in. I wouldn't put it past him to be able to figure it out just by seeing which keys I press.
"Two blue. I win again!" Stan said, moving his little piece and throwing his hands up in victory.
"Are you cheating?" I picked up the cards and scanned through them.
"What, no. You just suck dude!" He tossed his little character into the air, catching it with ease.
"You can't just suck at Candy land! There's no strategy or anything complex. It's based solely on luck. The only way to lose like this is if someone was shuffling the cards in a certain order."
"I'm not cheating. If I were cheating, I'd be kicking your ass back to last week, but you've gotten really close to beating me. Sadly, God's on my side every turn."
"Whatever. Hey, what do you think Cartman's up to?"
Stan shrugges and gathers the different colored people back onto the first square for another game. I reach for my phone and look through my recent texts with Cartman.
"He's been really weird lately. First, he avoids me for weeks on end, then he asks me about my sexuality, then he asks me how I feel about you, now he's stalking me?"
I read over the last text I had with him aloud to Stan, who doesn't really pay attention. He starts to play around with the little people as I read.
"FATASS: Hey Joo! U Liek guys or chicks?
KYE:What? Why do you want to know?
FATASS:Bcuz, im doin smthn. Dudes or chicks?
KYE:Like I'd ever tell you
FATASS: pls joo! i wont tell no one
KYE:No, and text normally."
I scroll down to our recent messages, where he asks how I feel about Stan, and read it over before telling him.
"FATASS:hey joo! how do u feel abt Stan
KYE: wdym?
FATASS: just like, in general. do u like him or smthn?
KYE: No, he's my best friend. You know this.
FATASS:just checkin"
"Sounds like he has a crush on you or something."
Stan says this sarcastically, but I can't help but ponder this. I mean, it doesn't make sense in context of who Cartman is, but it makes sense if you take everything he's been doing lately into consideration. Avoiding me, then asking about my sexuality, then asking about how I feel about Stan, then stalking me. He might just be plotting another plan to antagonize me, but this feels different this time. Stan notices my serious face as I query this thought, and rubs my back affectionately.
"Hey dude, I didn't mean that. It's probably nothing. Let's just go back to playing board games."
"It's not nothing Stan. It doesn't feel the same this time. Also, why would Cartman stalk me? He already knows basically everything about me, after years of knowing me. What could he possibly be doing that concerns me?"
"Dude, you're probably stressing over nothing. Cartman's most likely just trying to get on your nerves again. Don't give the satisfaction."
"But Stan, this isn't like the other times. Usually when I catch him in the act, he'd come up to me by now, explaining his plan, but he hasn't."
"Look,if it makes you feel better, we can stop by his house and investigate okay?"
I'm not sure I want to go to his house, not with the possibility of him liking me, but if Stan's by my side, I might be able to keep him away. I nod and we set out to Cartman's house. I feel my stomach drop when Stan knocks, and I feel like running. If Cartman so much as breathes the same air as me, I'm punching him in the face. When Cartman answers, he looks completely surprised, but I know he's over exaggerating the look to seem surprised when, in reality, he expected us to show up.
"Oh, hello Stan and Kyle. What are you two doing here?"
Stan snarls and steps up to Cartman. I never realized how tall those two have gotten. Cartman's still pretty fat, maybe even gained a few pounds, but he's gotten pretty tall too. Maybe from his dad's genes. And Stan is a little shorter than him, but a lot skinner. I think I might weigh more than him, but not 100 percent sure on that one
"Cut the crap fatass! Why were you stalking Kyle?!"
"Bold of you to assume I was stalking Kahl. Do you really think I'm so absorbed to Kahl, that everything I do revolves around him like the moon?"
"Yes! It's always been like that. Are you telling me that you're not doing this just for Kyle, cause that's bullshit."
"You can argue with me all you'd like Stan, cause I could care less, but that doesn't change the truth."
And with that, it was over. We didn't even get in the house. Cartman just shut the door and left us outside. Stan tried to break in, but I reassured him that it wasn't worth it, and to let it be. We left back to Stan's house to play games, and study. Stan's having a hard time in school because he's constantly texting Wendy in class instead of listening to the teacher. I've told him that texting Wendy all the time will hurt him in the long run, but he insists that it's important. I swear, sometimes I wonder if Wendy is as smart as I once thought. She knows that Stan's falling behind because of her right? Whatever, it's not my place to talk about relationships. I've learned not to interfere with my friends relationships, cause it would just drag me into their mess. I have enough going on, and I don't need any drama right now.
We went to bed at 12, but I couldn't sleep for the most part. I'm pretty sure I'm an insomniac, but I don't want to tell anybody, because they'll just worry. So usually I just lie in bed, thinking. Most of the time, it's just weird thoughts, like when you say the words 'forward' and 'back' your lips move in those directions, but tonight was different. I couldn't get the idea of Cartman liking me out of my head. It was so repulsing that I felt sick just thinking about it. I'm not even sure if I'm gay or not. I mean, girls are hot or whatever, but I can never imagine myself ever dating one. I have never imagined future me with anybody. All I see is me and my friends, just older. That might be a bit childish, but that's the way it's always been. I don't know any other life from the one I have. I should tell somebody about my worry. I know if I don't, it'll just pile up until I break, and that's probably what Cartman wants. I turn in bed, to see if Stan is awake. Generally, he's awake at this time. I mean, it's not even in the AM yet.
"Stan, are you awake?" I whisper, even though I don't have to. His door is closed, and we're too far for his parents to hear us, but just to be safe, I whisper.
"Yeah, are you?"
"How could I have asked you if I wasn't?"
"Oh yeah. So, what's keeping you up?"
"I'm just worried."
"Let me guess, the Cartman thing again?"
"I can't help it Stan. I feel sick just thinking about it. Seriously, it actually makes sense, and that scares me dude. I don't want Cartman to like me!"
"Kyle, Cartman doesn't like you."
"How are you so sure?"
"Because, I just am."
"How? You know I'm not just gonna let this slide. I need legitimate reasons."
"Because if Cartman liked you, he would've said so already."
I take a second to think over this thought. Would Cartman have told me if he liked me? Well, Cartman's pretty secretive, but he can't keep his mouth shut when it comes to me. Also, if he wouldn't tell me, then he'd most likely tell Butters or Kenny.
"Maybe, I guess we can ask Butters or Kenny about it tomorrow at school. Just to be sure."
"Okay. We should get to sleep. Good night Kyle."
"Night Stan."
Little did Stan know that I barely slept that night. I fell asleep around 2 AM, woke up at around 3AM, went back to sleep, woke up again, all the way until morning. It's almost painful, but at least I wasn't worrying about the Cartman situation all night.
When Stan woke me up for school, I nearly punched him, I was so tired. When I was up and getting ready, Stan was already in the shower. I didn't bring any extra clothes, so I settled on wearing one of Stans shirts. I picked a light green shirt, faded a little, and some jeans. They were kinda baggy on me, but fit nonetheless. Since I had forgotten all of the bare necessities, I didn't get to brush my teeth or brush my hair today. I settled for eating an apple and just shoving my unkempt hair into my hat. I didn't plan on taking it off today anyways. When Stan got out of the shower, and got dressed, we went off to the bus stop. Since Cartman's mom started taking him to school everyday, it was pretty shocking to see him there, along with Kenny and Butters. I made a visible effort to stay away from him, by stand as far away as possible. Stan noticed, but said nothing, probably thinking the same thing I was. I figured now was as good a time as any and moved up to Butters and Kenny.
"Hey guys, I need to ask you something. Can we talk at breakfast?"
"Well, of course Kyle." Butters exclaimed. Kenny just nodded and I walked back to my place next to Stan. We stood there in complete silence for a while, until the bus came. We all made our way on the bus and took our usual spots like robots. It's just our normal routine at this point. Me and Stan discussed how we were gonna spend this weekend, but my mind was elsewhere. I was trying to figure out how the hell I'm gonna ask Kenny and Butters if Cartman likes me without sounding weird about it. Also, I need to figure out how to do it without Cartman getting suspicious.
Before I know it, we arrive at school, and everyone piles into the building for breakfast. Nobody actually eats the schools breakfast, not even Cartman, so we all just hang around until first period. I tapped Butters and Kenny on the shoulder, implying that they follow be behind the school.
"What's up Kyle?" Butters asks. Kenny doesn't say anything, per usual.
"Do you guys know if Cartman likes anybody?"
Butters grabs his chin and looks off, trying to recall anything.
"Not that I know of. Why?"
"I think Cartman likes me."
Butters gasps and Kenny turns to me, confused.
"I know its a bit far fetched, but based on everything he's done to me recently, it seems like a big possibility."
Kenny grabs Butters shoulder and tells him something, that makes Butters nod and walk off. Kenny turns back to me, and takes his hood off. He almost never takes his hood off, so I figure what ever he's about to say next is very important, and I listen closely.
"Cartman hates you. He's stalking you and Stan because he has something 'big' planned. He won't say what though. So, stop worrying. It's probably not too bad."
"He's stalking me and Stan? That explains his reaction yesterday. Thanks Kenny."
"No problem."
Kenny pulls his hood back up and walks inside the school. I don't follow him, instead I go to the front of the school, where Stan waits with Wendy for me. We all share first period, so we go together. As Stan walks with Wendy, he talks to me.
"So, what'd they say?"
"Kenny told me that Cartman hates me still, thank god. Also he just has something big planned. At least he doesn't like me."
"Something big? Like what?"
"I don't know dude, don't worry about it. Nothing can be worse than what I thought was going on."
I don't understand why Stan's acting so worried. I've proved time and time again that Cartman's no match for me, as I easily foil his plans, but I guess that' not how Stan sees it. I attempt to assure him it's fine, but he doesn't believe me, and I can see the visible worry on his face all throughout class. I dismiss his worries, and choose to focus my attention on school. I'm not too worried about Stan. He has Wendy to talk to.
AN: Hello Children, Older Craig (the author) here! I didn't put an authors note on this chapter, I realize which is good because it gives me the chance to say that I'm rereading this fic and going back to fix some things. For example, if you are coming back to this then you'd know I changed how Cartman looks in this fic bc for some reason, I made him out to be skinny aka "The fat evened out through his body". I REALLY don't like that trope anymore, just because IMO it's kinda fatphobic. And it changes nothing about the story so I cut it out. New readers, if the quality in writing changes every so often, that is why :)